NCT's Baby Boy| 24th member ~ Lai Yu-han

"I'm done pretending to be okay" Part One

Trigger Warning: Suicidal thoughts

Yu-Yu has been having a lot of anxiety attacks and social anxiety issues, so the younger had been very tense and hesitant around everyone. The members were quite worried for the day ahead of them, since they were all scheduled to have their virtual fan sign. They were mainly worried about the younger's anxiety levels rising.

The child reassured them even though they didn't quite believe him. Yu-Yu came up with a resolution that could help him stay calm and relaxed. The members agreed to the plan and allowed the child to fall through with it. The child knew that making flower crowns had always been calming.

The staff were allowing the child  to make flower crowns throughout the virtual fan sign. Yu-Yu was on to his fifth flower crown, when he was presented with a fan on the phone. The fan was quite nice which helped the younger stay calm. Yu-Yu was doing alright until one American fan girl caused him to freak out.

Yu-Yu was busy working on a flower crown, as he greeted the girl. "Annyeong!" The girl rolled her eyes and showed the child a fake smile. Yu-Yu tilted his head like a curious puppy. The girl kept staring at him which caused him to feel a little uncomfortable. The child tried to break the ice, "How are you?"

The girl said in the most snotty way, "It was amazing up until you came onto my screen. You ruined my perfect day with your ugly face." Yu-Yu not understanding what the girl had said, look towards the translator for help. The staff looked at the young boy and translated the first part.

The child pouted and looked at the staff with a sad smile. Yu-Yu looked up at the girl on his screen. He quietly apologized, "I'm sorry for ruining your day. I hope you have a better da-" Yu-Yu was rudely interrupted by the bitchy girl again. The girl shouted at him in English since she knew there would be a language barrier.

"YOU'RE SO FUCKING UGLY. YOU'RE NOT EVEN GOOD ENOUGH FOR NCT. YOUR VISUALS MAKE ME WANT TO GAG. I HOPE YOU FUCKING KILL YOURSELF. YOU MAKE ME SO ANGRY EVERYTIME I SEE YOUR FACE.

YOUR FACE IS SO PUNCHABLE THAT I SO BADLY WANT TO BRUISE YOUR FACE. YOU'RE USELESS TOWARDS EVERYONE. PLEASE GO KILL YOURSELF, STUPID ASS BITCH!" The translator stopped translating after she finished hearing the first sentence.

The translator was about to scold the girl, but Ten and Johnny stepped over. Johnny shouted towards the bitch, "You can shut your mouth. Don't even think about saying such horrible words toward my fucking son ever again.

You have no right to say anything remotely close to what just came out of your mouth. I advise you to shut the hell up before you get blacklisted by the company." The girl grunted and blurted out, "He's an ugly piece of shit. Why are you trying to defend him?"

The other members mainly Mark and Jaehyun heard the girl, and the two other members grew furious at the 'fan'.

Mark had enough of the girl badmouthing his little brother. Mark growled, "YOU CAN SHUT THE FUCK UP! WE'RE DEFENDING HIM BECAUSE HE'S DONE NOTHING BUT BEEN SO KIND AND GIVING TOWRDS US. HE DOESN'T DESERVE TO BE CALLED HORRIBLE NAMES AND TOLD TO KILL HIMSELF.

I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT PEOPEL LKE YOU ARE THE REASON WHY SO MANY OF US DON'T FEEL HAPPINESS ANYMORE. GO LOOK IN THE MIRROR BEFORE YOU TRY TO COME AFTER MY BROTHER'S LOOKS." Jaehyun had to calm himself down, before he could say something to the girl.

"HONESTLY, YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSLEF. YOU'RE THE REASON WHY WE RARELY EVER HAVE VIRTUAL FAN SIGNS. 'FANS' LIKE YOU MAKE ME WANT TO SLAP SOME SENSE INTO YOUR HEADS. YOU SHOULD GO LEARN SOEM DECENT RESPECT AND MANNERS."

The girl started to fake cry causing the rest of the members to roll their eyes. Ten was on the side comforting a shaking Yu-Yu. The older whispered to the child. "It's okay. Don't listen to that ugly girl. Baby, she's just a hater that somehow got into the fan sign."

Yu-Yu started to whimper as the girl glared at him through the screen. Ten demanded the girl, "You better stop glaring at my child, before I go over to America and whoop you into the damn atmosphere." Yu-Yu whimpered out loud, as his shoulders shook from fear.

"You're a meanie head. You hurt my feelings and didn't even apologize. I don't want you to be my friend. You're just a big meanie head. You yelled at me even though I did nothing wrong. I'm not gonna give you my flower crown, you big meanie. I hope you drink a rotten banana milk."

The girl blew off his angered statement. The girl tried to blame her anger on Yu-Yu. "but... oppas, he's so ugly. He can't sing and he makes me throw up." Haechan screamed at the bitch, "SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH! DON'T EVEN CALL US OPPA ESPECIALLY AFTER YOU JUST DISRESPECTED OUR CHILD. USE COMMON SENSE."

The girl was about to say something else, but the translator cut the phone off and smashed it to the ground. The members all looked at the staff with a shocked expression. The staff walked away to report what had happened as the other members tried to calm the young child down.

Yu-Yu asked in a heartbroken tone, "Is what she did true?" The child stared at the ground trying to not full on breakdown. Ten reassured the child, "Of course not! Don't listen to anything that she said." Yu-Yu asked while a tear rolled down his cheek, "Do I have to kill myself to make everyone happy? Is my presence not enough?"

All of the members hearts broke at hearing the younger's last question. Mark stated with a serious look, "That's nonsense... you know that your presence is what makes people happy." Yu-Yu shook his head not believing the older.

Yu-Yu looked up at his members, "Really? It seems like fans would rather have me dead then in the group. Hyungs it hurts to have to struggle with such a messed up mental health on top of people like her. I genuinely don't know if I'm okay, but I have to pretend to be or else I'll get more hate or become a disappointment.

I don't even want to be alive at this point.

It hurts so much to hear people call you ugly, want you to commit suicide, and say things that can trigger you into a state of panic. Why am I the one who's always being kind, yet receiving quite the opposite in return. I want to be good enough for everyone... not a punching bag that is being overused.

I'm done pretending to be okay."

How do you feel about Yu-Yu expressing how he truly feels?