Bad Things (Hinata Shoyo Ambm)

Chapter Sixteen

*A slight mention of some past rape

Hinata's Pov
It felt like a very vast and hallow hole was where my heart was. The more days that passed the hole just grew twice the size of once was. And everyday just got more harder for me.

Most days I didn't even wanna get up from the intense headache, to me sobbing my heart out to sleep. It just grew way worse. It at least had to have been a month since Calum broke up with me.

Just the thought had my lips quivering just a bit. It still feels like it wasn't real. It can't be but then I wake up every morning with texts from him. I feel like I was a zombie, I would go to practices and I wouldn't say too much cause I didn't have the energy I barely said a word to Kageyama, anyone.

I did everything in silence and to catch up on my sleep. I would sleep in classes or during passing periods at lunch. I firmly started cuddling the hoodie, I had slipped on this morning feeling tears blur my vision hiding my face in the sleeves.

God of even still faintly smells like him... He had such a pleasant smell one that made me happy really.

"I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough for the both of us to be together." I wept quietly wiping at my face but they just grew fast.

"Onii-Chan! What's the matter?" I jumped a little seeing a very stern looking Natsu. Shit I thought wiping at my eyes fast forcing a smile.

"Ah big brother is okay Natsu come here." I smiled moving towards her. She leaned herself in my arms moving to sit in my lap. I sniffle hard my nose stuffed but I held her close to me wrapping her up in the blanket with me.

"Are you sick Shoyo? Your face is really warm and you've been crying again." She frowned pressing her hands on my face I just smiled.

"I'm okay. " I lied just for the sake that she wasn't too worried.

"Shoyo... Where's Calum I haven't seen him in a while." I felt that pain come back but I gulped it down quickly.

"Calum.. He's just been busy Natsu but we might not see him for a while alright." I told her gently slowly rocking her with me.

"Shoyo you know I'm not stupid hmph, he broke his promise didn't he? You've been crying again... is it because you remembered." I shut my eyes tightly. Natsu was really really smart for such a young age.

It was something I always put in the past of my life because it still stung. I was still only in middle school when it happened and I was still trying to get my volleyball skills up. Some older high school guy offered to help me.

I was very naive and innocent so I got the help from him for a few weeks. I trusted him he made me feel safe, but my trust for him was what lead to him raping me and using me abusing me to his advantage. It's the memory that started me crying to sleep so badly, seeing a therapist my mom never likes to bring it up.

Technically Calum wasn't my first time, but mentally in my mind he was because we both loved one another. I never told him with fear that he would leave me, judge me. Never see me the same.

"He made a promise to you?" I asked her gently moving all her hair from her face a bit.

"He promised me that he wouldn't make you cry to sleep anymore, now I gotta kick his butt." I breathed out a small laugh and hugged Natsu much closer to me.

"I think Kageyama is the one who should have his butt kick Natsu." I chuckled snuggling to her more she could always make you feel better when it got really rough.

"I can kick his butt too- Oh onii chan last night I was watching a movie cause it was just randomly playing, wanna hear the song that was playing." I contemplated it before nodding handing her phone to go on YouTube she started typing quite focused but I watched her hand my phone back before this soft music started playing out.

I focused on the title "Heartache one ok rock." I whispered but I then focused on the song quite focused while Natsu was humming along with the beat.

I hated that I was so sensitive at the moment because the lyrics sort of just crashed down on me out of nowhere and before I knew it. My body was shaking roughly and I started crying a bit hiding my head.

Natsu was quick squeeze me fast in a hug screaming out.

"Mom! I made Shoyo cry on accident! I'm sorry." She yelled even more but I just wanted to cry and just let it.

"Natsu.... Shoyo is just really fragile and sensitive right now sweetie, here come here." I felt Natsu was picked up and felt mom started stroking at my hair a bit.

"Shoyo it's gonna be alright." I hated everyone saying that because obviously it's not gonna be okay, nothing was gonna be okay, it's just getting worse and worse.

"Its not gonna be okay mom... Nothing ever is I miss him so much... Yet he doesn't even want me anymore... Maybe deep down he really doesn't love me anymore... "