Worth it |Mattia Polibio

Part 22

Mattia pov

It's been almost a week. She's not answered my calls or texts. And I haven't left my bed since then.

I didn't have it in me to talk to anyone. I didn't even have it in me to face anyone because I was so embarrassed. Embarrassed because they all knew just how crazy I was about her but it still didn't work out. They all knew how much I put into this to make it work and I still managed to fuck it up some how.

Was I really that bad of a boyfriend?

Was I just not cut out for a relationship?

And I tried getting over her, I really did but nothing worked. She was everywhere, and I couldn't get rid of her.

I'd remember some of the things she borrowed, and it hurt my heart a little when some of them still had a hint of that apricot fragrance of hers.

I'd look in the mirror and move my hair out of my eyes. I'd start remember all the times she'd run her hands through it, and just how amazing it felt.

Sometimes I'd just stare at the photos of me and her from our first date and I'd start crying a little because I really took that day for granted. She looked so gorgeous and so beautiful and there wasn't even a single part in me that could argue that she wasn't.

I heard someone open the door, and then 2 sets of footsteps walked closer to me, " hey," ale said quietly.

I didn't respond or turn to face him. I was laying on my left side, my back facing him. I just carried on staring at the photos in my hand.

" how you doing?" He asked.

I closed my eyes for a second and cleared my throat. I shrugged in response because I didn't have a word for how I was feeling right now. I felt so empty inside and though she broke up with me almost a week ago I was still in a little shock.

I heard kai tut and he took the photos away from my hand, " Mattia you gotta stop doing this to yourself," he said to me calmly.

I knew he didn't want to argue with me, and they were both just trying to look out for me but it wasn't going to work.

" it's been a week Mattia , how long is it going to take for you to.....move on?"ale asked.

I didn't know to be honest. This was different for me because this wasn't a mutual breakup. This whole thing with Jordon was actually going really well for me and I wish she told me before that it wasn't going as well for her because I could've sorted it out. I could've fixed it. I would've done anything to keep her, " I don't know if I can ale,"

They both went quiet and I felt them both sit on the end of my bed.

I sat up and held my head in my hands, " can you guys be honest with me?" I asked them. I looked up at them both and they nodded, " I didn't do anything wrong did I? I treated her well right?" My voice cracked near the end and I took in a deep breath so I wouldn't start crying again.

" Mattia we've been over this, you did nothing wrong. Jordon said that herself in her text. You showed her nothing but love," ale said.

" then what is it? Why did she leave? Is there something wrong with me or?"

They both looked at me pityingly, " no mattia there's-"

I interrupted kai, " but there has to be. There has to be some reason that every single, fucking relationship I get into ends so badly!" I could feel the tears falling now, " she was everything to me man, she meant the world to me ," I closed my eyes and held my face in my hands, " she was so fucking perfect for me. Everything just felt so right with her."

They both went quiet again.I could tell they were trying to think of something to say.

" then go get her back," kai said. I wasn't expecting him to say that. I looked up at him, and by ales baffled look I could tell he wasn't expecting him to say that either.

Ale looked at me then back at kai ," Kai that's not-"

" yeah I know, I know," he said waving ale off, " we were supposed to make him get over her but he's too hooked up on her. She's like some sort of drug that he's addicted to," ale put his hands back against his head and I could tell that he was a little annoyed. Kai turned to face me, " if you really mean what you said about her then you should get her back,"

Ale scoffed, " what are doing kai? This wasn't part of the plan, we're supposed to be helping him,"

" I am trying to help him." He said a little angrily . They both stared at each other annoyed and ale turned away so kai carried on, " There are certain people that we should let go in life, like all your exes, we knew they weren't good for you and we knew they weren't worth your time. But some time in your life you're going to meet someone, someone you should fight to keep. Someone like Jordon, and you'll know she's the one because you'll feel like how you are now, you'll know that she's the one you want to risk it all for because she's worth it."

I honestly wasn't expecting to hear this at all right now, and above all from kai because let's be honest he's not really experienced in this sort of stuff.

He smiled at me sadly, " And hey I could be wrong with all this but I just want the best for you man and I want to see you happy. And I only ever saw you happy with her, she made you the happiest version of yourself I've ever see,"

" so you think I should go back for her?" I asked, sniffling a little. I felt like I needed this push but I was still a little hesitant with it all.

" no," ale said elbowing Kai. He shook his head, " don't listen to him!" He told me and he turned to Kai , " you're giving him false hope again and that's going to make him worse than before," he looked back at me, " don't get me wrong I really liked Jordon, I loved seeing the two of you together but you can't live recklessly like this and pine after one girl. It happens to all of us Mattia, and if It ended it ended for a reason right? So why go back for it?"

" because some people are worth going back for," kai snapped, and he looked over at me, " if I had something with someone like what you had with Jordon I wouldn't give up on it. Good things don't come easy Mattia and they sure as hell aren't easy to keep either. And if it doesn't work out then at least you can say that you tried, and you won't be wondering for the rest of your life how this could've turned out,"

Ale tutted, " I can't believe you right now," he said to kai , " I knew I shouldn't have brought you, you never stick to the plan,"

Kai scoffed, " your plan was ass," they both started arguing leaving me to think about everything.

I was confused to say the least and I was still a little lost on what to do. I laid back on my bed staring at the ceiling, hoping that I'd be able to make my mind up on something because at this rate I don't think I'll be able to sleep at night again.

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I just saw a tweet that said 'do I like being choked or do I just want to die?' And that got me thinking about half of y'all. So guys, which one is it?!?!😭😭