"What in God's name is this??", she shouted, my bedroom door flying open to reveal my angry mother, a pathetic cream-colored sheet of paper being crumpled my her fury, her other hand planted firmly on her his in an authoritative manner as her glaring eyes burned into my soft, freshly tear-stained skin.
"You got a B, Elizabeth. What. The. Fuck. What the fuck have I told you about getting Bs?", she snarled as she stomped towards the edge of the bed, her heels clicking while my fingernails buried deeper into my scalp.
"T-They're unacceptable. I-I'm sorry. I'm trying really hard, I promise I am. I swear it, Mom! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, just please don't y-yell at me. I'm so so sor-".
"You're SORRY? No, no, I AM SORRY. I'm sorry that I was burdened with such a piteous excuse of a girl to be my daughter, who has displayed nothing but failure and disappointment for our family. I had hope for you, Elizabeth, that you might've ended up better than your dead sister and father. Was that really so much to ask for?? Even THEY were better than you, and that's saying a hell of a lot. At least Polly got As and your father earned us SOME money. But you- you do NOTHING. I almost wish they hadn't died in that damn car crash, which wouldn't have even happened if you weren't babbling.".
"Mom, I was five years old... It wasn't my-".
"I still loved them though, but you HAD to take them away from me! YOU BITCH!".
My lip began to tremble, tears trickling from the corner of my eyes pitifully. I denied her eye contact as they continued, allowing myself one hesitant sniffle. That was, as always, yet another mistake.
Her palm made contact with my face in a flash, delivering a painful blow to my cheek as I let out a distressed whimper, blood rushing to my cheek to alleviate the burning tingle that took place.
"You're nothing but a heap of nothing.", she spat. "I wish you were never here. You better fix yourself before I do something we both regret, you slut.".
"I'M NOT A SLUT!!".
"Oh?". She spun around on her heel, eyebrows furrowed with anger, along with a cruel smirk that tore across her face. "How much do you want to bet on that, sweetie?".
"You may not have had sex or a boyfriend; you'd be disowned if I ever found out you have had either. However, you're still a slut, or at least you will be. Watch me be right.".
"I hate you, Betty. This is your fault. You did this to yourself, you ungrateful piece of...".
~~
I slowly opened my eyes, both of them already welling up as I came to my senses and recalled the flashback-dream I'd just experienced, the same memory that replayed through my head for days on end, no end in sight. That was only one of many.
My legs were entangled in the blanket that I still shared with Jughead, him still asleep beside me with his head on top of mine as mine laid on his shoulder.
I really am a slut, I told myself. Here's a man I met only a day or two ago... I can't even remember... I'm THAT incompetent... And I fell asleep on a man I hardly know at all. Mom was right... She always was, you worthless fuck.
"Betts? H-Hey, what's wrong??", Jughead muttered groggily, interrupting the painful silence I'd mustered for myself.
"N-N-Nothing... I-I'm sorry... Y-You shouldn't e-even be here or ha-have to-".
"Shh. Shh, don't cry, it's okay... Breathe with me.", he whispered, his arms folding around me tightly. He rocked us back and forth as he'd done before, attempting to calm me down.
"Follow my breathing, Betty. See? In and out. In and out... I'm wearing lavender essential oil. Can you smell it? It's floral... It's calming... What does it remind you of? What does it feel like to you? What emotion does it instill in you? You don't have to answer out loud. You can just think about those questions, alright? Just... Just listen to my voice, okay? I've got you... I'm right here with you. You're safe. Everything is okay. Everything is alright. You're healthy. You're going to be okay.".
