"I was r-raped, Juggie.".
"W-What?".
The muscles in my face went numb. My heart stopped. He froze beneath me, his head raising to stare at the top of my head while he gulped audibly. He began to loosen his grip around my waist, lifting us back upright.
"Betty... I-God, I'm so sorry. Do you-".
"My mom. My mom hired someone to do it. I took them both to court and, spoiler alert, they didn't believe that the girl with the most desirable mother in town could ever go through such hardships. Throughout the process, I was rejected and belittled. It was as if everyone turned a blind eye. I lost in court. They didn't believe that the perfect mother could ever harm her daughter. The hearing didn't even last 30 minutes.
Th-They both called me pr-pre- I'm sorry, Jughead. I c-can't do it. I can't say it. It h-hurts too much.".His erstwhile tears barely had time to dry before his cheeks were re-coated. I shifted backwards off of his lap, placing myself on the chilly wooden floor in front of him, and his hands slid off without resistance.
"Betty, I'm so proud of you for telling me, you have no idea. That takes an incredible amount of strength to do. I knew you were strong, but I hadn't realized the depth of the situation. I can't imagine... I-I don't know what I can say other than tell you how hurt I am on your behalf, not to mention angry.", he said, though his expression remained soft and troubled by this revelation.
"It's okay, Jug.", I said, the clear faux happiness dripping from my voice as I grinned exaggeratedly. "I deserved it. I'd cost my mother an incredible amount of pain, so it was only fair that I got what I had coming. I wish I'd realized that before I'd taken them to court.", I stated.
"However, that doesn't mean I'm any less t-traumatized by it. That's normal, right? D-Do I have the right to be upset about what happened to me?".
"Are you serious right now, Betts?", Jug inquired, his voice raised, nostrils flaring.
"No, Jug. I'm lying to you about what happened to me. I'm lying to you about why I am the way that I a-am now. OF COURSE IM SERIOUS!", I yelled, digging my nails into my calves as they were what my hands had been laying on.
His expression shifted momentarily, almost instinctually, and he shook his head rapidly.
"O-Oh, God. I'm sorry, Betty. T-That's not what I meant at all. Of course I believe you.
What I meant by that is do you seriously blame yourself? Do you honestly think you deserved what happened? Do you believe that the things they did was defensible?". I watched his leg bounce anxiously, his shoulders caving in as I practically observed the pain he felt for me.
"Y-Yeah... I do. I know you're going to tell me that I'm w-wrong, as I always have been, b-but that's how I feel. I-It's what I've always been- I'm sorry, Jug. This is really hard for me to s-say after all this time of k-keeping silent.". I fell forward, the wave of pain striking through my legs due to how inflexible I was not bothering me in the slightest, going unnoticed.
"B-Betty, c-can I hold you? Only if you want to and if you're comfortable. I hate seeing you upset.".
"Yes. P-Please hold me, Jug.". He reached out, grabbing hold of me from under my arms and hoisting me back onto his lap. I shuffled around until I got comfortable while he wiped my face dry, though that state didn't last very long. I reciprocated, swiping his tears away as best I could before I cuddled snuggly into his chest, soaking his shirt as I clung to it.
"I-It's not your fault, Betty. You have to believe me. Nothing that happened was your fault at all. The accident wasn't your fault. Your a-assault wasn't your fault. You landing a shitty mother wasn't your fault. Y-You haven't done anything other than be the wonderful girl that you a-are.", he cried quietly, grasping the back of my neck and holding me tightly to him while he resumed our previous rocking motion from earlier.
We sat for ages, struggling to rest in the uncomfortable atmosphere that had settled around us. Our sobs had subsided, our eyes too dry and both of us run down.
He let out one last sniffle. "Betty, why don't you go get some real sleep, okay? You need the rest desperately, I can tell, and you've had an unimaginably long day.".
I pulled away, sliding myself back onto the floor in a hurry and diverting my eyes to my feet as au stood up.
"Fine,", I answered monotonously. "But you have to sleep, too. You stayed up all night worrying about me, and it's clear that you need just as much sleep as I do. More, perhaps.".
He huffed sharply, slumping his shoulders. "Deal. Come on, let's go.".
"Actually, Jug, I'm... I want to stay alone tonight. I'm don't think we should stay in the same bed anymore, at least not for now, not after what we-I did yesterday.".
He winced, distress flashing across his face for a moment before he compelled his face to soften. It didn't all wash away; the hurt in his eyes lingered, but visible understanding joined alongside it.
"Yeah... um, okay. Goodnight, Betty. Let me know if you need anything.".
