Bittersweet ~ Eremin ~ Modern AU

Chapter 30 - Refuge

Warning: Hints of abuse

Song: Hideyuki Hashimoto - Endroll
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Eren Jaeger (17)
Fall of Junior Year
Sunday, December 20th, 5:09 pm

   His actions went stiff at the sight of me crying, making me dismissively wipe my face off on my sleeves. His hand dropped down to my bruised collar bone, his fingers lightly grazing against my shoulder as he reached down for my hand. "C'mere..." His voice smoothly beckoned me.

   The lump in my throat was practically choking me, clenching my need to cry. I knew I was going to have a breakdown. Just the feeling of my cheek being cupped made me cry. God knows how hard I'll break if he hugs me.

   Trying to disguise my limping, I followed where the blond led me to which was the living room couch. I took a pretty bad spill and twisted my ankle just trying to escape my own house.

   Armin sat me down in this oddly proper way, only letting my hand go when I had plopped down into the cushions. He took a couple seconds to go squat down by the fireplace, lifting a little grate up from the bottom to click the fireplace on. Soon, the fire sprung alive, the blond standing up in front of the fire which gave him this mirage-like glow.

   His brisk legs hurried over to me, sitting down beside me to help himself underneath my blanket. I could feel myself hold my breath as his lithe limbs outstretched to me, our hips now connected when his arms hugged around my shoulders. Stricken with such a warming sensation, I dove right into his hug without second thought, hearing the blond grunt and stammer aimlessly. Coherence was practically nonexistent.

   My lips started to twitch and tighten again in attempts to restrain myself from bursting. Practically suffocating myself just to remain strong for Armin. But I couldn't take it anymore. My heart had no room left for my discomfort and rage. Gripping tightly on to the blond's shoulder blades, I let out the ugliest cries I've kept dormant forever. Gasping and choking out into the crook of Armin's neck.

  "O-Oh, honey..." He disappointedly murmured, but Armin did the best possible thing for me and kept his hug firm, showing no hesitation in comforting me. His tantalizing hand kept circling around my back light as a feather as I expressed every single burden I carried. I wasn't taking into consideration how much I had dampened his sweatshirt with tears, drool, and snot. It was embarrassing deep down. I wanted to pull away to fix myself up and suck it up. But I was convinced Armin wouldn't let me go if I tried. I'll make it up to him later.

   Eventually, climax had started to decline. My body started to rag doll on to Armin's, snuggling up to him submissively. This numbing sensation flooded my veins, my vision clouded with a hazy, solemn glaze. He had his legs tucked up beside him, leaning himself into the corner of the couch so he was able to support my weight on his chest. The memory of how I used to cuddle my mother flooded my brain, causing my eyes to seal shut as if I could erase that last happy memory with my mother. I wanted to replace it with Armin. I couldn't think about her right now.

   Eventually, I was able to quite myself besides the occasional snuffles, feeling the blond budge only enough to reach over to the table beside him. He then showed that he grabbed a small cube of tissues, plucking out a couple sheets to pad my face down like I was a child.

   Eventually, I nudged his hand away out of embarrassment and gave him a lackluster smile, continuing to clean myself up. I couldn't help but catch that Armin used a tissue for himself, mainly clearing his eyes. Our eyes locked for a couple moments, abruptly raising my head from his shoulder now that I knew I had gotten everything I needed out. "S-Sorry... That was ugly." My fried voice croaked out. It was as if my esophagus was coated in sandpaper.