blurred devotion. brent faiyaz.

.《 29 》

she grew weak in the knees, so i sat her down on a chair at the table.

she then grabbed a napkin & swiped at her forehead.

" marco. "

i almost fell back. wtf am i doing wrong to deserve all this bad karma? i was overwhelmed by the info.

damion ( her baby daddy if y'all forgot. )

damion's brother. a horrible person. he made fun of my baby netty's death. disrespected me on several occasions, shoved me out damion's house infront of damion. i looked down towards the floor. this shit was too much. finally, livin my life. doing what i wanted. just for this shit to happen to me.

i felt a growing pit in my stomach. like i had to throw up. i clenched my stomach with my hands & almost retched.

" girl, you okay? " amriah looked up from the table & grabbed my shoulder.

" yeah, yeah i'm good. " i struggled to get out.

" here. " amriah pulled out a shiny bottle from her bag & placed it infront of me on the tabletop.

i looked at it.

" a ginger shot ? " i raised my eyebrow at her.

she smiled & opened the bottle. she then raised it to my mouth & poured the contents down my throat.

i gagged. it was slimy, sticky, & was hard to swallow. almost like peanut butter, just poorly liquefied. i stuck out my tounge.

" ugh. " i wiped the corners of my mouth with my sleeve.

" don't think i'm dumb saint. i saw all that artificial sweet shit you was eating. " she shook her head & stood up to throw out the tiny bottle.

i rolled my eyes, hands still on stomach.

" i told you, that you gotta start eatin like white folks. all this healthy shit. ya body is fragile mama. yk that. " amriah told me giving me a soft hug.

i nodded in her embrace. my arms wrapped around her waist & i sighed.

she started to massage the top of my head.

" listen, ik this is all sudden. saint, if you won't come i want you to know that i know for a fact yo strong self gon be alright. i love you & i always will. i just needa. get outta town. just like how you- " she paused & seemingly choked on her words.

i looked up at her. " it's alright amriah. ik what you gon say. just like when netty died. " i was numb to people bringing it up, but it always brung back an old pain.

i finally stood up & grabbed amriah's hand making our way to my room.

i entered my closet & choose a simple outfit. nothing too big.

a simple oversized yankees jersey & blue jeans, matched with a blue fitted.

the time amriah & i spent packing her stuff was silent. rarely any speaking. but i knew we was both okay with that.

trey came to pick us up. well, really amriah but wth he think?? i wasn't gonna see my bestfriend off? tuh.

the airport was muggy, dry, & empty. it was a ghost town.

" so, this it ? " amriah faced me with tears brimming. i smiled at her & held her close.

" i love you saint. & i'm gonna miss you so fucking much yo. "

i chuckled.

" it's okayyy. just three weeks. just go with mama rose. give her my love. "

i gave amriah a hug once again.