blurred devotion. brent faiyaz.

.《 19 》

for years, saint's dad had paid for everything she wanted, needed, or owned.

mr.williams or as his first name mike. or as the streets call him Big M, had always looked out for his daughter.

mike ran drug businesses. he was a kingpin druglord. he was always busy with his supply and render. & the need for his stuff was high, so he never had time for himself of his family. he neglected his wife, kids, & the rest of his family. when his son died, it hit him hard. so hard, he popped pills to die. even tried to hang himself, by driving to a deserted motel to kill himself with thick rope. but all in all, he couldn't do it.

he didn't keep track of saint. he knew she hated him after that. he didn't know what to do, say, & tell saint. he just kept his distance & loved her from there. he was never necessarily the father figure she needed. on days, where she would get bullied at school she'd come to him, & all he would tell her is.

' you eat those. ' ( a saying for like, " suck it up ''. )

as if she could understand that as a child.

mike was always onna move. & ever since his babygirl lost her babygirl, he knew he was a horrible parent. he knew there was nothing he could do. he stayed away from her & did nothing out of the fear of rejection. he was a coward.

after that, for some reason he felt in debt to his daughter. he would secretly pay off 80 percent of her bills without her knowledge when she moved to upstate new york. she would always pay minimal price for her financial worries. she always thought it was weird, but would ultimately brush it off blaming it on the area.

but then, she moved to atlanta. that really messed with him. even though, he never really was with his daughter he still felt that parenteral pain of his child moving away from him. & the fact that she didn't tell him, & he had to hear it from the streets. made everything worse.

from day 1, he tracked her down & made connections & started to once again secretly pay off only 70 percent of her bills. she never knew anything. & that's he way he wanted.

______

saint drove to the nearest hair salon & was feeling herself. she was yelling & screaming and all that !

______

i turned up the radio and began twerking in my seat. i thank GOD for this blessed opportunity. it was finally my time to spread my light around the world.

i pulled into the driveway & walked to the salon. inside smelled like burnt hair, nail polish removal liquid, & bathnbody works perfume.

i went up to the receptionist, placed my appointment, & sat in an empty seat. scrolling through my timeline on twitter, a text popped up on my phone.

brent 🍃 - i'm getting sick and tired of you...

i covered my mouth & laughed.

i wrote back,

me - lmfaoo bro my bad i forgot you texted me.

brent 🍃 - 🙄

me - stopp i'm sorry 😂 , but wh ? whatchu want ?

brent 🍃 - damn a nigga can't check up on you?

me - never said that, but i wanna know why you left so abruptly that day?

brent 🍃 - nunya

me - well thennnnnn, i'm doing good. but don't text me cuz ian gon be picking up. i'm busy. bye.