Your Addictive Heart || l.s

Pack It Up

Harry snuck in early that morning but that didn't stop his dad from catching him.

"God, Harry. Where have you been? Do you have any idea what time it is?" His dad lectured him.

His eyes were still sore from tears that showed no restraint. He was tired. In more ways than one. "I was out, dad. With my friends." He just wanted to be alone now.

He was done with thinking about it all. He was done hearing his friends groan on about their betrayal. He was over crying over him again. He just wanted to be alone. He wanted to drift off and not come back for a while.

"I'm going to need to a lot more of an explanation than that. Do you think you can just come and go like this? Without telling anyone where you were all night. Your sister has been up all night worried sick." He lectured Harry with his same expressionless face. He wondered if his Dad even cared about him sometimes. Couldn't he see the hurt on his face? Couldn't he tell his heart had been ripped apart?

"I was with my friends. We were up all night drinking and getting high, dad. Is that what you want to know? Or do you need to know more?" He wasn't in his right mind but it didn't matter anymore. This was his chance to finally tell him how he felt.

"Earlier that day I was preparing for opening night for a musical that I have been working on for months. I designed all the costumes and this was supposed to my day to shine. Yeah, until my boyfriend decided to trash all of my...our hard work because despite every sign and red flag...I actually believed he loved me. So, there you have it. You know everything about me. And before you tell me how sick to your stomach you feel or how you wish you could have any other son in the world just know that I'll be out of your hair soon enough." He stared back at his dad blankly. He was sure he'd be crying if there was any part of him left to give.

"Harry...what are you talking about? What do you mean by that?" If Harry didn't know any better he could have sworn he saw an ounce of concern on his face.

Harry let out a sharp sigh. "I'm going with Mum. I decided." He nodded sure of his decision.

"Son, I- I got to tell you...I'm not- I'm not happy to hear that." He crossed his arms looking uncomfortable in his own skin. He looked small to Harry for the first time in his life.

"Well, I'm sorry I let you down dad. It won't happen again." He gave him a tight-lipped smile. "I have to go pack." He whispered. "Mum is coming for me later today. I'm going to spend the week with her and then we're leaving."

Harry rushed to his room and started packing. He wasn't pretty or neat about it. He just needed to get it done.

An hour into it he heard a knock on his door. At this point, he was starting to realize how harsh he may have handled things. "Can I come in, son?"

He let out a long breath as he stared at the mess in front of him. He had way too much to do and not enough time to do it. "Yeah." He answered in defeat.

"I just got off the phone with your mum." He said as he opened the door.

"It's too late. She said I could go." He continued his packing in front of him.

"I know. I won't stop you, you know? If this is what you want." He stood at the foot of his bedroom.

"It is," Harry reassured him without looking back.

"You know the day you came to live with us we were both so excited. I know I can be a little tightly-wound and you know, if I were you kids I probably would have chosen your mother too. But the truth is, I- I missed you kiddos." He opened up for the first time to Harry.

He didn't know what to say back. So, he didn't say anything at all.

"I was really shaken up. I put on a good front but you know. It was a big adjustment. After what happened to you at your old school I wasn't sure how to protect you. You know? When you're a dad you're supposed to be good for two things bad jokes and protecting your kids." He chuckled. "You know, it's not like when you were a little boy and I could pummel anyone who had a mean word to say to you. I can't be there with you all the time. I mean you're a young man now. A very kind young man." His dad continued.

Harry felt a heavy pressure in his chest. He never expected his dad to say such heartfelt things to him. He felt a pulling at his eyes again. Apparently, he wasn't all out of tears after all.

"I know how cruel kids can be. It wasn't always easy for me either. That's all I wanted for you. Things to be easier on you. I never meant to make you feel like I wouldn't love you no matter what. If I'm honest I don't know what I'm doing most of the time, Harry. I'm just trying to give you and Gems back some of the years I took from you. If you want to stay...I- I can try and ease up. I can do better... can you just- can you give your old man another chance?"

Harry couldn't look at him. He couldn't muster up the strength to face his father and his newfound vulnerability. "I- I can't stay." He said through stolen breaths. "Dad." He looked up at him with tears blurring his sight. "He broke me."

He clicked his tongue. "Oh, son. I'm s- I'm sorry." He wrapped him in his arms tightly. "It's going to be okay."

***
Looks like someone's got a LOT of baggage.

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