Your Addictive Heart || l.s

Epilogue: Said and Done

I don't have a lot of time to write the rest of this and I know you deserved more than a rushed apology and an unspoken goodbye but this is the best I could do. The truth is I've tried to write it all down about a hundred times but nothing felt good enough. There's nothing I could ever write or say to make what I did to you guys okay. It hurts the most to think of how I let you down, Harry. You were the first person to show me unconditional kindness and it was a beacon of light through every darkly tainted day. Every single one of you impacted my life in a way I will be so grateful for and it's my biggest regret that I couldn't be a better friend to you. You made me want to look for the best in people and believe there's good in everyone. I know you think that your compassion is a weakness but it isn't. It takes a whole different kind of strength to give second chances, to look past a person's facade and find goodness, to give your heart out so regularly——even to strangers when we live in such a cruel and ungrateful world. I choose to believe in a karmic universe and I believe one day you will have the best of everything. Just promise you won't run away. Ever. I know it's easy when you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel but I know it's there. I saw it growing brighter and brighter every day that I spent with you guys. That's why it's so hard to run now, even though I know we need to. You guys made me feel like there was something better waiting for me. That's how I want you all to feel. So, tell Liam he's extraordinary. He's not living under anyone's shadow. He's his own source of light and if he tries to burn any brighter he'll surely burn out. Tell Olivia that she's the closest thing to perfect but life is messy and she needs to get her hands dirty for herself like she does for her friends. Tell Zayn not to worry. He doesn't say much but he loves the loudest. I sent in a little video to admissions of all the hard work he did to recover the musical and I expect he'll be getting some good news soon. Tell Niall that sooner or later he's going to have to stop cracking jokes and put his heart on his sleeve granted, his heart may take up a lot more than a sleeve but he deserves to share those parts of himself without fearing that it might scare people off. He's kind of like our maple bacon milkshake...sounds funny but incredibly sweet. And Anna. Sweet Anna. When she's loyal I don't think there's a bridge that girl wouldn't burn for you. Be patient with her and tell her to be patient with herself. She's impulsive, stubborn, and at times her worst enemy. She's going to keep getting herself into trouble and I need you to keep bailing her out. I know that's a lot to ask but I promise you she's got a good heart and she's punishing herself more than you know. Tell her she's worthy of being loved...don't tell her now...but when she starts looking at Lottie, and not just when she thinks nobody is looking, tell her she deserves to be loved by someone who's going to love her just as recklessly and head-on as she will and then remember to turn her around anytime she starts to run. Tell Louis thank you. As big of a heart as he has, I don't know why he hides it. You're very lucky to be loved by someone so selfless. He saved my life in more ways than one. He doesn't realize it and maybe he never will but that's not the point, the point is he's a hero. He saves people. That's just what he does. Show him that even heroes need to be saved sometimes. He's the strongest and the bravest person I know, but he can't fight all his battles alone and he shouldn't have to. I will never forget what he did for me and I will spend the rest of my life trying to be a person worthy of that kind of compassion. Oh, and tell him that we're friends. Whether he likes it or not. I don't know if I'll see you all again but maybe someday we'll cross paths again. I'll have a new name and maybe a different hair cut and we'll have a fresh start. You'll tell me all about your life and this time I'll try not to ruin it until then take care of each other.

All the love,

Diana ♡

Louis sat on his front porch step and neatly folded the letter along its creases. He huffed out a sigh and set it aside.