When Heaven Smiled

19

Chapter 19
Firsts

I held his hand before closing my eyes. Tahimik kaming dalawa habang nagdadasal ng taimtim. I secretly prayed for him. Alam kong naninibago pa siya sa ganitong set-up. But I wanted him to feel that I was supporting him. Siya ang nag-initiate. He said he wanted to experience praying with me.

Lord, please know that I am aware that I owe You a lot. Thank You for your protection. I appreciate everything that You constantly give.

Today, I ask You for guidance. To everyone, I am still young and I know nothing about love. I know nothing about relationships. I have no right to feel these feelings since they were shallow—for them.

But I know that You won't put Maxon in my life if it isn't in your will. My story wouldn't unfold this way, if it weren't for him. I already encountered a lot of changes the moment he came. I appreciated both discomfort and pain; the freedom of learning what it is like to be independent little by little.

Huminga ako ng malalim. Ang mga mata ko ay nanatiling nakapikit. The emotions I was currently feeling were pouring even though without words. I felt Maxon's thumb encircling at the top of my hands.

Please guide us in every step. Guard our hearts. Hindi ko pa man siya sinasagot, alam kong may plano ka para sa akin at para sa kanya. And if it's in your will that we have to separate for our growth—huwag naman po sana. Pero kung iyon po talaga ang nais N'yo, tatanggapin ko. Just give me a sign so we wouldn't hurt each other.

Help him reach his goals, always give him a sense of direction in this life.

At sana po pala mataas ang makuha naming grade sa exam!

Napahaba yata ang panalangin ko dahil nang imulat ko ang mga mata ko, nakadilat na siya. He beamed. Ngumiti ako at bumitaw sa pagkakahawak sa kanya. Titig na titig siya sa akin.

"Review na tayo sa Philosophy?" anyaya ko sa kanya. Nagsimula ko na isalansan ang reviewers at handouts ko sa center table namin.

"Okay," Maxon answered. Hindi pa rin inaalis ang titig sa akin.

"Maxon, itigil mo 'yan," Sita ko dahil nararamdaman ko pa rin ang diin ng titig niya. "Kaunti na lang iisipin kong patay na patay ka sa akin." I laughed at my own joke.

"True naman po, Ma'am." He uttered dreamingly.

I rolled my eyes and bit my lower lip. Bwisit.

"Okay, batuhan tayo ng tanong ah." I told him formally so he could focus. "Doon muna tayo sa tatlong philosophers."

Maxon cleared his throat and read his index card. Inayos niya ang pagkakaupo ng Indian sit sa carpet namin. Mabuti na kasing dito kami sa sala para makita rin ng mga kasambahay ang ginagawa namin. Mahirap na kapag nag-report sila kay Papa.

"What method is examining a topic by devising a series of questions that let the learner examine and analyse his knowledge and views regarding the topic?" Maxon asked while staring at the paper.

"Socratic method, the other term is method of elenchus." Mabilisang sagot ko. It was easy. "Ako na next."

Inilapag niya ang index card niya dahil doon naman ako sa handouts nagtanong.

"His studies in logic led to the formulation of a formal process of analysing reasoning which gave rise to deductive reasoning." I arched my brow and eyed him.

"Easy, si pareng Aristotle." He clasped his hand proudly.

Tumango at nangiti. Hindi nagtagal ang review namin sa Philo kaya sumunod kami sa ibang subject.