That one night
Car rides with my dad are normally awkward and rare. My father tries so hard to avoid me, ever since I stabbed Kyung my dad sees me as a freak. He thinks whats going on with me is not normal and doesn't want any part in it. It seems like he has been drinking more ever since, It was already bad before that incident but now he doesn't even look at me. Our relationship worsens the more the days go on which I found it really weird that my father agreed to drive me to a coffee shop.
It was two months after the incident with Kyung took place and I wanted a place to chill and relax. Father was already on his way out and allowed me in the car with him. The radio was playing low and we were driving by a neighborhood near a high school.
I hear him sigh at the sight of the school, "What?" I asked him.
"We should at least enlist you in an online school," Father mumbles looking ahead of him. I looked down at my hands that were fidgeting with each other before responding.
"All the programs I applied to wouldn't allow me in-"
"Of course, because you're crazy!" Father raised his voice still looking away.
"I don't want to go to school either way...its too traumatizing,"
"Quit it Jinhwan, you're just making excuses," I look up at him, "Without a proper education you will fail in life....even with one your might be too sick to work," He looks down at me and points his finger on my head, "You might kill someone with this brain,"
"Appa...the diagnosis isn't that bad, I don't believe in it," Quickly I move my head from his finger and he moves too. I look out the window placing my head on the window.
"What do you mean you don't believe it? You've obviously gone crazy...aish how did I end up with a son like you?" Father mumbles but his words are clear to me. I try to ignore it but it hurts, "When your mother was pregnant with you, I worked three jobs so you could live comfortably and what do you do? You make my life a living hell..."
"Appa you don't have to be so harsh...I wasn't born like this,"
"Exactly, your sick mother probably did this. She does whatever you say now and you don't even speak to her with respect," Father shakes his head turning the corner.
I start to mumble words into the air, "At least she's been nice to me..." Father stops at the red light and grabs onto my collar.
"Yah Jinhwan, fix your life. Go back to school and live normally. All the parents scold me for not raising you better but there's no way I can fix you, you need to realize this yourself," He quickly lets go of my collar as the lights to green and continues driving. I roll my eyes at his words, "You don't work, you don't study, you don't clean or do anything productive. Why am I working then? I should just live like a bum like you if life isn't that important," At this point I start to realize the main reason he wanted me to drive with him was to rant about how I am such a bad son, "You turned 17 and this is how you are living? You want to continue making me sick? I drink every time I think of you because there's nothing I can do anymo-"
I turn my body to him and shout, "Aish just stop already!" I felt the car harshly stop and the car behind father started to honk their horn annoyed at the sudden stop.
"Yah don't raise your voice at me!" Father taps the back of my head a little harsh and continues to drive, "You could use the time at the coffee shop to figure your life out..."
"Okay okay I will. I will think about it when I'm there," Me agreeing caused him to finally stop talking and pulled up into the coffee shop's parking lot.
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