Always been you

2020 (27)

It's not the morning I always envisioned, but I'm not complaining. I get out of bed cautious to not make any noise and wake Camila up. I grab my shoes from beside the bed and tiptoe out of her room. I didn't get drunk last night but my mouth is equally dry. I step into the kitchen and spend some minutes opening cabinets till I find the glasses. Water runs smoothly and fresh down my throat and it's a welcomed feeling.

I don't know if I should go or stay until she wakes up. There are some things I want to ask her, but I'm not sure if I want to hear the answers. Either way I prepare coffee because she's going to need it once she gets out of bed.

I hold my face with my palms and breathe deeply, elbow over the kitchen counter. Last time I saw Camila this drunk was at our prom and things ended a bit differently back then. For starters, my mom wasn't screaming at me the next day for making a mess in the middle of the night when we got home, or Camila's dad calling half the town because they didn't know where she was. In my bed, that's where she was. Safe and sound. None of that happen this time.

"Hi...", she says so softly that I'm not sure if she's actually here or if I imagined it. I open my eyes and look over at her.

"Hi", I sit up and clear my throat, suddenly feeling like I'm intruding in her house. "I'm just... I was waiting for you to wake up, I'm gonna leave now".

"No, no", she puts her hands up to stop me. "You don't have to. Sit down, please".

I comply hesitant and she walks inside the kitchen. Her hair is messy and her eyes look a bit puffy, but she's gorgeous as always. Immediately a ball of golden fur appears by her side, purring around her feet. She's barefoot and her legs look smooth. Why am I thinking this? Why I can't behave around her?

She gets cat food out and serves it to her pet that's impatiently waiting.

"Oliver came to wake me up. I'm surprised he didn't kick you out of bed", she chuckles shyly.

I hadn't even seen the cat since we got here last night.

"Why? Does that happen a lot?", I ask and automatically want to dig a hole and bury myself in it.

I didn't mean to be rude or try to offend her, I don't know why I said it. I shut my eyes as to avoid the awkward moment.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean-", I apologize but she interrupts me.

"It's ok", she murmurs and turns around. Her hair falls over her shoulders and back, long and shiny. The soft cotton pijama she has on covers her curves beautifully and I can't take my eyes off her. I want to go to her, move her hair to the side and kiss the skin on her shoulder. I barely removed her shoes and jewelry last night. I wasn't comfortable taking off her clothes this time, so she had just changed recently. Did she do it for me?

"You made coffee", she notices and moves over to coffee machine.

"I did. Figured you would need it".

"I'm sorry about last night. It wasn't my intention to drink so much", she says.

"No worries. I'm glad you called", I dare to say and hold my breath waiting for a reply.

She takes two mugs from a cabinet, still backwards to me.

"I remembered you told me you didn't drink so I assumed you were the right person to call", she explains and my heart sinks a little. That wasn't the reason I was waiting for, also not the reason she said last night.

"Right...", I sigh.

"I hope I didn't ruin any plans", she says and gets a tablet of ibuprofen from another cabinet, she swallows and takes a sip of water.