Always been you

2020 (30)

The first thing I notice is that Camila has a big bag with her and that makes me happy for some reason. She's waiting for me outside her house and I hurry to stop the car and help her with her luggage.

"I haven't been there in so long and it's always cold, so I didn't really know what to pack. It's different from where I've been these last years", she rambles next to me as I fight with her bag to put it in the trunk.

"I think you're going to be fine", I say sarcastically referring to the clothing situation but she's looking at me like if I had given her life worth advice when I finish.

"I'm nervous... or anxious, or both", she tells me and stands still next to the car.

I close the trunk and walk up to her. I had the feeling this was difficult for her, but maybe it was much worse than I expected it.

"We're going to be fine", I say holding her gaze.

She takes a deep breath and then nods. Before I know, I am kissing her forehead. I blink rapidly before she can look up at me and see how clueless I am about my action too. I turn to open her door and then walk around the car, not crossing stares with her.

I start driving and she sits silentely next to me. If this is how the trip is going to go then I'll be miserable for me, and it's also a long trip. I dig in my head for something to say and then it hits me.

"So... when did you get that nose ring again?", I ask her as I take the highway. I meant to ask her as soon as we ran into each other a couple of months ago, but for some reason I never did so.

"On my second volunteer trip", she says looking at me.

"It looks good".

"You always liked it, didn't you?", she smiles and I get butterflies because she knew I did.

"Yeah", I nod shyly.

"My mom was really mad when I got it the first time", she laughs.

"I remember", I say.

"That was the part of the reason I got it".

"You were... a handfull on our senior year", I comment careful not to offend her or trigger anything.

"Well you should know", she winks and smiles. I know she's messing with me but I can't help but blush. I hope she doesn't notice.

I still don't quite understand how Camila took my feeling for her so lightly. I struggled with them for many years and when they were really out, I was the only one losing my mind over them. I guess it was never that deep, for better or for worse...

"Did you have breakfast?", I change the topic.

"Yes, but I wouldn't mind some snacks", she grins and I know I'll stop somewhere to get them. "Did you?"

"Yes, but I wouldn't mind more coffee", I reply in the same manner.

An hour later I stop at a gas station and Camila goes inside the store to get snacks. I watch her as she walks in and a guy that was  going out turns around to check her out.  I wanna sceam at him, but he's soon gone so I calm myself down.

"I got you an expresso", she hands me a cup of coffee when I'm done pumping gas and waiting for her next to the car. The smile on her face could light up an whole building.

I thank her and our hands touch as she gives me the coffee. The chills are not a joke and are not because of the weather.

"So, how long do you think it will take us to get there?", she asks me.