(80 reads?! i am MINDBLOWN!!! thank you so much!!! sorry for not posting yesterday, i'll post another chapter later to make up for it :3 also, i'm thinking of doing a sequel for isabelle- just like her love story and stuff, so lmk if you'd want that after this one! sotc is like that by doja cat. happy reading!!)
Ness splashed the freezing tap water onto her face, flinching with the shock of the cold hitting her pale skin. She scrubbed furious at the spidery makeup that ran down her cheeks, like the trail of an aeroplane in the sky, desperately trying to remove the notion that she had ever been vulnerable.
She hated herself for distracting him, when he could have been helping, fighting. She knew he would beat himself up about it, and she hated that. She hated being the cause of his pain.
Ness always seemed to hurt him, yet he was the only person she'd ever cared about like that. She loved Isabelle like a sister, and she even had a tinge of affection for Jace, but Alec was different. Alec was a boy she could fall for, care about, a boy who could drive her crazy. A boy that she could love.
She felt so small and insignificant compared to the shock of the massacre. Here she was, worrying about herself, when all of those people were dead, all those Shadowhunters, those werewolves, those vampires, those Seelies, her own kind. All of those people who had lives.
Moms.
Dads.
Siblings.
Maybe even kids.
And Ness couldn't shake the feeling that it was her fault.
It made sense, right? The Institute had been doing fine before she came, no weird, necromantic demons, no massacres, no Gladius Inferni's and certainly no daughters of hell. If she had just left well enough alone, maybe Jace would have a nice girlfriend, and Isabelle could be in the Institute, doing what she loved the most, being a Shadowhunter, and Alec would be okay. He wasn't okay now, and it was because of her.
"Ness?" a voice spoke from the door. A female voice. Ness whipped her head around and came face to face with a smiling Isabelle.
"Izzy!" she shrieked, flinging her arms around the other girl. Isabelle laughed and hugged her back tightly. They embraced for a moment, before Ness pulled away and held Isabelle at arm's length, taking a good look at her. Isabelle's time in Idris had done her good.
She'd gotten a tan, so her skin looked more golden that ever before, and her face was flushed and healthy, her eyes bright and her mouth curved into a grin at the sight of the girl who had grown to become her best friend. She looked so alive, so healthy, so exhilarated. She looked so happy.
"You look amazing!" Ness exclaimed, admiring her friend.
"I feel amazing" Isabelle admitted with a smile. "I didn't get any answers, but the course was incredible". Ness nodded excitedly and gestured for Isabelle to sit on her bed.
"Tell me everything" Ness demanded, and Isabelle laughed.
"Nothing you'd be interested in" she scoffed jokingly. "I didn't get a boyfriend."
"I never said that" Ness protested. "But I'm taking you out for coffee, because somehow I don't think you wore a habit the whole time."
"I can't argue with that" laughed Isabelle, and in fairness to her, she couldn't.
"So anyways, when we at the dinner, he just stares at me, and I mean gawks and I was like "well serves you right, being so rude to me" and he kept trying to talk to me then and he was like "I know we didn't have the best first impression but I think we could vibe" and I just laughed at him, like "oh yeah, you ignore me for the whole day and then when you see I'm actually quite attractive you suddenly and conveniently forget about that?" like yeah, no" Isabelle scoffed.
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