LOVE IS GONE - is this an end for us? (junkyu x reader)

6

JUNKYU POV

i was brought out of my thoughts when i heard clapping, oh they were done

i thought i had moved on, hadn't i? but why? why now? why are you in front of me when i have been doing fine without you?

"junkyu-yah" the ceo called making me look at her with a confused face

"the song you recorded yesterday, let's have you perform it once and let me hear it before y'all group record" she said with a small smile

i had no choice but to nod, i have to perform the song i wrote due to her in front of her who was looking straight at me with an expressionless face. where did my minnie go? do you hate me that much?

>>>>THROWBACK<<<<

last few weeks had been the worst ones, the love of my life left me without a reason, i had to submit an entry song to qualify for the reality show that's going to be start in a month or so.

yes, an entry song, to select the trainees we all have to write a song and only the best ones will qualify to compete in the show

i have been having terrible headaches, i can't sleep, hwamin won't answer my calls, she disappeared, now when i need her the most, she's not here beside me.

love, where are you? didn't we promise to be each other's strengths?

a tear rolled down my eye

i dont wanna cry.. i took the pen in my hand as i started writing my feelings out on the piece of paper in front of me.

"because i loved you, because saying i love you isn’t enough, no matter what word i say"

i said that i loved you right? i begged you to stay but you? you just left..

"leaving me, who cherished only you
where did you go? did you go far away,
because you didn’t like me any more?"

you didn't even give me a reason? you were tired? i know that's not what it is, did you leave me because you didn't love me anymore? did you even love me at all ?

"don’t play around, i know you’re there
i feel like you’ll appear, so i wait aimlessly i need to go find you, go find you
if i cry now, i might not be able to see you so"

everyone keeps on telling me to accept my reality, to accept this reality of you not being by my side anymore and how i have to continue this journey alone, but im not ready to accept the fact that you don't love me anymore, please come back? if you can't come to me, i will come to you. please?

"this road that doesn’t seem unfamiliar, feels unfamiliar, asking me once again if this is a road i know of"

everything seems unfamiliar without you, my life seems unfamiliar without you beside me, it's get harder everyday, i try to put on a act but who am i kidding, i cry myself to sleep every night. i feel so empty.

"could that person, be looking for me
i’m looking for you right now"

rather than expecting that you have left me all alone, i will continue to believe that you will come, won't you? i can't find you anywhere, i asked everyone, no one would reply to me.. where did we go wrong? did i do something wrong?

"i’m okay (i’m not okay)
i don‘t want to see you ( i really want to see you)
i have to say, say these lies that don’t even come from my heart"

i try to convince myself every day, i need to make myself okay cuz you're doing well without me. i need to do so too then. i was a fool, why did i even think you'd care at all. the love in my heart is being consumed by hatred. i'm starting to hate the person who once was my happiness.