SUGA

Not Again

Jin sat and watched Suga as he slept soundly. He could get up and leave at any moment but he felt like if he did, Suga would wake up.

Of course he was curious as to why Suga refused to sleep alone, but he asked no questions. Suga would tell him when he was ready.

However, Jin still had the urge to ask him. The members might have been there to help Suga before he collapsed but no one knew what had happened to him the entire time he was in his studio. The thought made him wonder but it also made him worry... What happened to Suga when he was alone in his studio?

Was it something he saw that made him feel like he HAD to keep writing? Was it the members that made him feel like he was "lazy"? Did he even really want the members to help him-

*knock knock*

Jin was startled when he heard the knock on the door. He'd completely forgotten where he was for a second because he was so caught up in his mind. Taking a shaky breath and calming himself, he got up to let the person standing behind the door inside.

"What do you want?" Jin whispered tiredly.
"Geez hyung, hello to you too." Jimin replied sarcastically.
"I was just coming to get hyung so that he could eat lunch with us. Wait, why are you in his room?" Jimin asked confusedly.
"Where's hyung?" Jimin asked while trying to peek his head inside of Yoongi's room.
But Jin stopped him before he could fully look at Suga.
"First of all Jimin-ie, he's sleeping so could you whisper please and secondly, he just ate some food. Now that you know he isn't hungry please let him finish sleeping." Jin whispered harshly.
"Oh I didn't know that he was sleeping." Jimin whispered while tapping his chin.

He appeared to be thinking about something, but what? Jin wondered.

Jimin saw the bags under his hyung's eyes. He knew Jin was only irritable because he hadn't slept. Although everyone was equally worried about Suga, Jin was ESPECIALLY worried. He'd gone the entire day with no sleep or food; it obvious that it was taking a serious toll on him.

"Hyung, why don't we switch places?" Jimin asked aloud.
"Huh?"
"Ya know, I'll watch hyung and YOU can finally eat and sleep... And shower... And brush your teeth. Did you know that your breath smells REALLY bad right now?" Jimin said.
"Thanks for your concern, (although it was more of an insult), but I can finish sitting in here with Yoongi."
Jimin chuckled and hung his head low.
"Hyung, hyung, hyung, do you know what they're having? "
".... Food." Jin stated obviously.
"Not just any food,"
Jimin leaned in and whispered in Jin's ear.
"BBQ."

Jin's eye widened at the mention of his favorite food. Well, how could he miss the chance to eat barbeque? The delicious, crispy flavor of the grilled meat and juicy vegetables. Jin could already imagine the delectable taste of the smokey meat and it made his mouth water. He wasn't gonna miss it...Suga wouldn't mind.

"Jimin, I leave him in your hands. But PLEASE don't wake him up, understand?"
"Sure hyung." Jimin said a little too happily.
"I mean it Jimin, let him rest."
"Yeah yeah, go eat your barbeque hyung."
Without having to be told a second time, Jin sped down the hallway- straight to the dining area.

Sighing contently, Jimin closed Suga's door and sat in the chair Jin put beside his bed. He pulled the chair closer to Suga; thinking that it was too far away from his favorite hyung.

However, he didn't expect the chair to make such a big ruckus. A loud screech was heard throughout the room.
Jimin froze; hoping and praying that Suga was a heavy sleeper. But of course his prayers betrayed him because Suga began to stir and woke up.

"Hyung?" Suga asked groggily while looking around his room.
His eyes stopped on the culprit sitting next to him- a little too close for comfort.
"Jimin-ie? What are you doing in here? Where's Jin-hyung?"
"He stepped out to eat lunch."
"Oh..."
An awkward silence fell over the two members.
"..."
"..."
"I-"
"So-"
"You go first hyung." Jimin insisted.
"Go ahead Jimin-ie." Suga chuckled.
Sometimes Jimin was too cute for this world.
"Sorry hyung, I didn't mean to wake you up. In my defense Jin was the one who put the chair so FAR away." Jimin stated dramatically.
"S'fine I don't really feel like sleeping anymore anyway." Suga replied.
"But you haven't slept in a WEEK hyung! Are you sure you want to stay awake?"
"Yeah, I can't sleep anyway, I'm already awake now." Suga said, throwing Jimin a knowing glance.
"Yep, you sure are." Jimin said uneasily.
Both members were silent again. Suga began to stare off into space; thinking about his studio.

Jimin on the other hand was watching Suga. He had the sudden urge to stroke his cheek as he observed him. And he did.

The second Jimin's hand came into contact with his face, Suga flinched. He was now back down to Earth and confused as to why Jimin was touching his face.

"What? Is there something on my face?" Suga asked - placing his hand on the exact spot Jimin was touching.

Suga was a bit surprised but he didn't mind Jimin touching his face. Afterall, the members had been together for years now; they were used to physical touch amongst themselves. Even if it was something as sensual as Jimin stroking Suga's face.

"Jimin...?"
"Are you okay hyung?"
Suga looked at Jimin and quickly looked away. Of course everybody would ask, they were still worried but it was getting a bit tedious.
"I'm fine Jimin-ah, just tired."
Jimin looked at Suga curiously.
"Ah, not like I'm sleepy but my body is tired. Just hurts a bit."
Jimin got up from the chair and sat on the bed next to Suga.
"What are you doing?" Suga asked.
"I'm gonna give you a massage. Just tell me where it hurts the most."
"You don't have to. If I lay down I'm sure the aches will go away."
"Aw, but I want to hyung. I just want to help you." Jimin said pouting.
'That's what Jungkook said too'. Suga thought.
"Okay...i guess. My shoulders and back hurt just a bit."
"Alrighty."
Jimin positioned himself to where he would be able to massage Suga's shoulders.

'Hyung's skin is so smooth' Jimin thought to himself as he began to massage his shoulders.

It felt like heaven to Suga. His body had been aching so bad that it hurt to sit up. Though Jimin's hand were small, they worked like magic. But Suga shivered once he felt something cold on his skin; causing him to close his eyes at the feeling.

"Jimin-ah?"
Jimin was lost; lost in his own world. He didn't even realize that he had began to put his hands underneath Suga's shirt. His hands began to trace a scar along his back. It stretched from his shoulder to the middle of his back -- a ghastly cut.

"Hyung? Where did this come from?" Jimin asked as softly as he could.
He couldn't fully see the cut because the lights weren't on but he could FEEL how painful it must have been.

"Nothing just a cut from when I was younger. It's always been there." Suga replied nervously.
"But hyung, it looks like it hurts. Are you sure that it-"
"I don't think I need a massage anymore Jimin-ah."
"What? But you just said tha-"
"Actually I am tired." Suga replied while pretending to yawn.
"Okay hyung then I'll just sit in the chair and-" Jimin tried to say as he walked to the side where the chair was.
"No!" Suga yelled unintentionally.
"O-okay then I won't sit in the chair?"
Jimin looked at his hyung weirdly. Why was he getting so worked up over the chair? Did he sit in it the wrong way?
"I mean, could you maybe leave? I'm pretty sleepy now that you mention it."
"But I didn't menti-"
"Please." Suga pleaded.
After staring at his hyung for a few seconds, Jimin got up to leave the room.
Watching Jimin leave, Suga closed his eyes and breathed in and out.

The scar brought back too many memories that Suga wanted to bury deep in his mind. They weren't meant to resurface. But here they were again, filtering his mind and making him feel trapped all over again. His breathing became rigid as he remembered the horrible truth behind his scar.
His eyes prickled with tears and his heart sped up.

'Suga why don't you work harder. A weak boy like you won't ever amount to anything ... Just look at you.

You're so useless.'

Not again.