Grown up kid

He kissed me

When I got home I rushed inside. Pony was the only one home that I could tell. I made sure it was just us two. "I kissed somebody."

"Who?" Pony was reading a new book. This one was titled 'The Painted Bird.'

"You know Michael? Well we went to Bird Creek and before we left he kissed me and then I kissed him."

"Congrats kiddo," He had picked up on the kiddo thing from Soda.

My cheeks were red and Pony noticed. "Do you like him?" He asked.

According Sandra I did. I kissed him. I'm positive I did now. "Yeah. Like how you like Johnny."

I went to my room to get fresh clothes that were covered in rain and dirt. I noticed Michaels blood shirt folded on my bed. Pink spots covering it. I picked it up and sat on my bed. What if I had jumped that day? What if Michael would have saw me jump. I hug the shirt to my chest. A distant smell of his cologne lingered on it. Or maybe the smell came from me. I liked it.

I sat in my room for the remainder of the day. I still could hardly believe he kissed me.

The clock read 9:36 pm when someone knocked on the front door. The whole gang was over to celebrate Steve's birthday.

"Eh! You invite anyone else?" Steve asks looking around the room making sure everyone was accounted for.

I decided to open it and I'm so glad I did. It was Michael. "Uhm- It's someone from school I'll be right back." I had lied to Michael and told him my family knew about us. I slip out onto porch and the night is reasonably cold.

"Hey Aidy. I was thinking about earlier."

"Yeah me too," I was tense but now just looking Michaels eyes my shoulders loosened and I smiled.

"I was thinking," He takes my hand in his. His thumb rubs across the back of my hand. "We should make this official. We both like each other, we kissed earlier. I think it's time."

"You mean like be boyfriend and girlfriend?"

"Yeah like that," He grabs my waist again and knees go weak. I didn't care if Darry or Soda or anyone on this planet saw me. I got up on my toes and kissed Michael again. The way Michael held my waist. I swear I was going to faint. "Yeah I definitely liked that," I relaxed my toes again and returned to standing flat. I looked up at his brown eyes. His hand migrated to the crease of my lower back.

The door opened and nearly hit us. "Oh," Steve backed up and closed the door.

"Who's that?"

"Steve. It's his birthday."

"Am I interrupting?" Michael pulled away. I was too scared to kiss him again.

"No. We aren't that close. He's Soda's friend mostly." I had told him everything about my brothers but he never really opened up about home. I never forced him. I knew that some people, like Johnny, couldn't open up about home. It caused too much pain. "Well. I should get back inside," Michael rubbed my hand once more and walked down towards the fence.

"Tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Tomorrow." As soon as Michael drove away the gang gathered at the window. Everyone smiled but Darry. I slowly opened the door and stepped back inside. "I'm back."

"I know I dropped out but I don't think you usually just kiss people from school," Soda says, laughing a bit.

"Y'all saw that?" I looked at the ground. I was wearing the shoes Michael had gotten for me.

"We saw everything Aidy," And Darry saw it too.

"Look I was going- I was going to tell you guys. It just happened today. It's Steve's birthday and I thought the focus should be on him."

"Tell us about that dude," Darry sits on the recliner, cross armed.

"Well- Uh- His name is Michael- Michael Miller. He's fifteen. Today we went to Bird Creek Bridge and he kissed me. And I think we're dating now- we are dating now. That's why he came over. To ask me out." I felt myself going on longer than I should have but i kept telling them all the times we hang out and then finally today when we held hands while cloud watching and when the rain finally escaped the clouds we stood there for an extra moment and kissed. Darry grew more disapproving.

"You're fourteen Aidy you don't need to be doing all this," Darry says once my story of Michael finally met its conclusion. I didn't understand this, not one bit. I had nearly died, twice, in the past two months and now I was so happy and alive. Michael watched as my finally wounds turned to scars and held my hand on the bridge I nearly jumped from. I had hurt so much before Michael found me and now I was free from it all. "I need you to end it this isn't good."

"I almost jumped off that bridge the day he found me!" I had held that on my shoulders for the past three months. The room filled with this silence. This was worse than the moths.

"You what?" Soda was behind me in the kitchen and his face was like he had just came face to face with a long dormant spirit.

"I-" I looked in his eyes and regretted telling them. Now they'd worry. I could kiss any opportunity with Michael goodbye. 

"Aidy."

"I'm fine- I'm. It's nothing it was months ago. It was after the stabbing."

"Aidy."

"It was nothing I just stood on the guard rail. I wasn't gonna-  I wasn't gonna let go."

"Aidy."