Bad Taste (Part II) // Colby Brock

209 - Rebecca

It'd probably been another couple of days when Colby went missing for an extended period of time. I fell asleep to him on the other side of the bed but woke up to him gone, and time passed and he didn't show back up. He didn't tend to spend that much time away from me—it was him or Tara usually—but neither of them showed. If my mind wasn't so blank; so useless, I'd be worrying and coming up with a hundred scenarios.

Instead, I was thinking about how alone I was lying there.

No matter how many times the thought crossed my mind that this was nothing like me, I couldn't change my actions or get up or do anything productive. I was stuck in place, waiting for something to save me when I knew nothing would. It was something I had to do on my own, and I didn't think I was was ready for that yet.

But of course, in a house full of vampires, there was no privacy or being alone. I didn't know if they'd been here before I woke up or if they'd snuck in while I was staring at the empty side of the bed, but the sound of Katrina's breathing mixing with mine drew my attention to the two girls sitting on the couch. They were patiently waiting for me to notice them but, not that I had, they still didn't say anything.

I felt suffocated under their gazes and sunk further into the covers, bringing them up and over my head so the warmth would swarm me. It worked for a couple of seconds. The thoughts would never leave me, though. The image of my mother certainly wouldn't.

After a couple of minutes—or maybe an hour—I thought I hear the door open downstairs then Tara said, "Hey, I think I know the answer, but do want to go out tonight?"

I didn't answer her, causing footsteps to lead up to the bed. Katrina—I knew because of her perfume—laid down next to me on top of the covers.

"Are you worried about Colby?" she asked, both of us ignoring Tara's question. But I didn't respond to Katrina, either. She continued, "You don't have to be if you are. He's just gone to patrol with Sam." She paused. "Well, he's back now."

"Yeah. Do you want him to replace us?" Tara's voice was closer now, but I still didn't answer either of them.

I had to admit, deep down, that hearing Colby was back in the house made me feel a bit better about lying in an empty bed. Not that I thought I was capable of caring too much yet. I was being selfish like that.

When there was still no answer for another minute, Katrina slid from the bed and two thumps sounded across the room. I pulled the covers away from my face, letting the room's dim light shine into my eyes for a few moments, then I rolled onto my back and stared at the ceiling.

I waited for something, anything to happen.

Somehow, my call was answered—though not with what I wanted.

The door opened and Jake slid through, a smile visible on his face even from my peripherals. He was striding across the room with his long legs, his footsteps missing as if he were skipping steps. By the time he was right next to me, he was looking down at me with that too-happy grin that made me want to punch him in the face.

"Rebecca," he said, but didn't add to it. I rolled to my side so I couldn't see him and went to hide under the covers before they were stripped away from me and thrown across the room. My head snapped—the fasted movement I'd done in a while—in Jake's direction to find him watching me with narrowed eyes. "I don't think so," he said. "We're going out and that's that."

I didn't respond, so he smiled at me. "That isn't a no."

"But it isn't a yes," Tara pointed out from the couch. I looked between them, wondering if they were on the same side, then sighed and closed my eyes.

"No! Come on, Rebecca. Get out there. This isn't like you and you know it."

"Jake!" Tara zipped next to the bed and started to drag Jake away, too panicked to notice me looking at him again. I felt my heart beating faster than expected as I thought over what really getting out of this bed meant; what going out meant. I wasn't ready for it, but a part of me wanted it.

"Look at her," I heard Jake grumble, spinning Tara in his arms. She looked at me and she saw me considering it, and suddenly she was sitting next to me.

"I really want you to come out with us," she told me. "Just me, you, Sam, Katrina and Jake... and Colby. Like a triple date." She smiled at me hopefully, but I wasn't responding. "Please? I'm refraining from forcing you out, babe. I really want you to come. I'm beggi-"

Before she could finish her sentence, I was sat up. I dreaded to think what my hair looked like by now and I didn't even let Tara's reaction get to me as her squeal filled the room. She clapped excitedly, patted my shoulder, then grabbed Jake and ran with him out of the room. Katrina was waiting at the door and she smiled at me before she followed them.

I couldn't believe I was getting out of the bed to go out with two of my closest people. But I supposed I could leave the house for once and see where it got me.

My normal clothing was off the table, so I found a hoodie from Colby's part of the closet and pulled on a pair of leggings and sneakers. I wasn't in the mood to dress up, nor was I in the mood to fashion my normal curls. After a strenuous amount of brushing, a wash, and more brushing, I was dragging it all up into a bun. It looked painfully similar to the one I'd had at the gala, but I didn't let myself think about that too much. I couldn't.

When I stepped out of the bathroom dressed and "ready to go," I found Colby sitting on our bed staring down at his phone. He glanced up for half a second then did a double take, and then he found his feet and took a step toward me. Though I didn't back away, he wasn't stupid, he knew I didn't want him near me yet.

Instead, he nodded to the door in questioning and I nodded. We started walking, which gave me the tiniest bit of confidence as I muttered, "Where are we going?"

Colby glanced at me, surprised, and said, "Out."

I didn't bother with asking more. We walked down the stairs to meet Sam, Kat, Jake and Tara at the door, they called out their goodbyes, then we left.

Sam and Kat went in a separate car, leaving me in the passenger seat of Colby's, and Jake and Tara in the backseat. Colby almost reached over to grab my thigh when he sat down, but he corrected himself and acted like he was moving something out of my way. I stared at the side of his face as he started the engine, and I considered what was so wrong with me that made me not want him to touch me.

I was being stupid, wasn't I? Putting my... grief on him when he didn't deserve it. Why did he have to be careful around me because I couldn't handle it yet?

I knew the answer to that: he wasn't the guy he used to be, he loved me, and he respected me. And all of that meant he wasn't going to push my boundaries until I was ready.

I wasn't.