Days, weeks, months passed he did his best to ignore the feelings for Julie that slowly awakened deep inside him and the issues between him and Ryanne continued growing day by day. Sometimes he didn't answer her calls, they rarely talked.
In the second week of July he was officially enrolled as an irregular student in an online class of De La Salle- College of St. Benilde, he continued his BS-HRM and told no one but his Mom.
He occupied himself with school work but every time he's not doing anything his thoughts were always filled with nothing but Julie. He tried ignoring the urge to check on her social media many times but the more he did, the more he didn't sleep at night. Until one day he didn't fight the urge to stalk her on her social media account...he didn't know but he always found himself calmer or at peace every time he looked at her pictures, he even printed one whole long picture paper and put it on his wall. When he found out she was playing COD, he played too. And never goes a day he didn't check on her social media accounts, especially her instagram, his day would never be complete without seeing her pretty face...she's become his inspiration, motivation, determination and a source of happiness...he almost forgot that he had a girlfriend.
One day he realized what he was doing was not healthy anymore. It's creeping the hell out of him...but the urge was too strong, he survived for three days but after that he gave up, she made him calm by just looking at her pictures and made him sleep at night peacefully, he let himself drown more deeply each day.
He tried to reached out Ryanne to save the relationship even though he knew it's impossible now that she always find her alibis not to talk to him, and sometimes when they talk they always end up fighting...he felt that she was just waiting for him to give up, she's not the Ryanne he learned to love anymore. Even though he didn't drink like the past few months, she's still nagging him...what made her mad more was when she asked for a video call he refused because every time she asked, he had an on going online class. He had a class from four in the afternoon to nine in the evening that she didn't know, it always made her fuming mad and accused him of cheating on her.
He loved Ryanne, he tried to understand her but as days passed their relationship became toxic. She easily gets irritated, mad and yells at him and still he tries to understand her.
It's been two months now that Ryanne stopped talking to him. And he just concentrated on his studies and almost every night found himself checking Julie's instagram, parang naging tambayan na niya hanggang sa makatulog siya. And slowly he tried to minimize drinking.
One night he was so bored, he was done with his school work earlier and he has nothing to do anymore. He tried to find something to watch on Netflix but nothing got his interest.
He went back to his room, it was past ten in the evening and still couldn't sleep.
He took his cell phone and laid down flat on his stomach on his king sized bed. A racy smile painted on his face.
' Don't Elmo. Shit! She's really beautiful and hot in all sense! ( And an idea got in his mind.) I'm so bored. I just want to know how she would react. Don't. You're just gonna hurt her. I just want to make fun, I'm so bored...and of course I know she's really good with anything she does (Thinking of the message he sent her when she posted her bagsakan cover.) I can't deny that. And I know she also strives really hard for where and what she is now. Okay, I'm just so proud of her, that' s all. Try harder Elmo, you know you've been keeping tabs on her for the longest time. Given the chance, titibok uli ang puso mo sa kanya. If you're not ready to fall yet, stop this craziness already. Do You think papansinin ka pa rin niya? She's Julie Anne San Jose, the Asia's Pop Sweetheart, the Asia's Pop Diva, you? Nothing but trash. I just want to have fun not to make her fall or I fall for her again. And I know, I know I don't deserve her anymore. I got it! No need to rub it on my face. (He took a deep sigh.) Okay. I admit! I don't have the right to miss her...but fuck! I do! I really miss her! So bad!'
