Dare - Draco Malfoy

Chapter 19: December

Maeve:

A thick layer of snow is now covering the grounds. The sky is grey, gloom spreading over everything. The sun has been gone for months.

One more week of classes before we leave for the holidays. Draco and I haven't talked for over 2 weeks and I didn't look for him. We ignore each other in classes and take different routes to the common room. I never linger around. I always shut myself in the dorms when I am not in class.

My thoughts are mixed in a haze of confusion. I do miss him. I miss him more when I am alone, like now.

I've been sitting by this window, reading for hours lately. Curled up in a ball, a crackling fire to keep me company.

"I am tired" Is my excuse to avoid people.

I shut myself in. My workload is better, now I have time to focus, always being alone. Aria spends most of her time with Isy outdoors or gathering with the others but I can't. I wouldn't stand it. She checks on me most days, I know she is there for me, but right now what I need is something she can't give me.

I feel empty, not knowing what is missing. Or I do know?

Sunday evening came unexpectedly early, my stomach is rumbling. I always try to have dinner and lunch earlier or later than everyone else, to avoid meeting people. I close my book and rest it on my lap. I close my eyes.

In one week time I will be home, away from all this. I need it. I need to be away from him.

"Hey" Aria just entered the room with Isy.

I look back and nod in acknowledgment.

"We are going for dinner. You coming?" She asks cooly.

I look at the clock. It's only 6.

"Yeah okay" I mumble as I get out of my pit.

-

On Sundays people eat later than usual and tonight is no exception. The hall is empty but for a few. Draco being one of them. My stomach wrenches.

"Oh shit Aria, I forgot something upstairs. I'll catch you back here in a moment" I lie.

She looks at me with suspicion but nods and lets me.

I turn hurriedly away and start walking the opposite direction. I don't want to be around him. He has a way of making me feel when he's with me. When he's too close. One more week. I have to resist one more week and I'll be away.

I have to keep the promise we made to each other.

It kills me.

-

I start walking briskly down the corridors. My thoughts make me loose myself in some old corridor. I haven't been here before. I just want to be far from the hall as possible. A group of voices startles me. I look up and see some fourth years passing by. I wait until they leave to turn back and direct myself to the dorms. My hunger is gone now. I'll just go to sleep early.

Ready to end the day in bed, after a shower, I fumble in my drawer to find some pyjamas and lift the sleeve of an unfamiliar white shirt. I thug at it to lift it from the pile of messy clothes and gulp as I see a tiny snake on the collar. I close my eyes remembering the night I got this. I let the fabric through my fingers, feeling the soft cotton before pulling it out fully. I remove the towel wrapped around me letting it fall to my feet. I let my arms inside the sleeves and button myself up. The shirt reaches the middle of my thighs. I release my hair from under the collar and pull them up in a pony tail.

I wrap my hands around myself, lowering my chin to smell the fabric on me. It smells like frozen winter and musk. It smells of him.

Monday came and went, as did Tuesday. After DADA classes in the afternoon I feel the urge to run back to the dorms, as usual, and finish my transfiguration exercises for tomorrow. I speed past groups of students and rush for the dungeons. I push the door open and find almost everyone had the same idea. The common room is packed already. Aria and Blaise talking, close to each other on a couch. Nott and Isy by themselves. It's loud. Everyone's excitement is palpable. There's only three more days till the holidays.

Draco is by the table, with Goyle and the others. The passage to the dorm's stairs is blocked by a group of guys in a circle, chatting and laughing. This means I have to get close to the table, close to Draco, to pass through.

I focus on my destination, looking straight in front of me. But as I pass I feel a cold hand grabbing mine. I flinch. Draco's eyes are fixed on a point in front of me, he's not looking at me at all, but his hand is on mine. What is he doing?

He is looking around carefully concentrated. The rooms is full but that's makes it easier for him to hide his gesture. I feel his fingers moving on my hand, shoving something in my palm. He looks up at me for an instant, and lets me go. I take one last look around. No one noticed anything.

I run to the dorms.

I open my hand to find a folded piece of paper. I unfold it slowly.

"Meet me on in the old classroom. Tomorrow, after classes."

My eyes widen. My heart races. I have been trying to avoid him for weeks and now this? Three days before the holidays?

I get to my bed and sit. I let my bag down and open my hand to read the piece of paper again. The letter makes my heart race under my chest. Why would he want to see me now?

I take my hands down my legs, massaging my knees. My mouth starts to water. What is going on?

My fingers down my legs, pulling the sock down. I go for a shower.

I remove my shirt and throw it on the floor. I open the shower tap and I take a look at myself in the mirror. My neck is back to pink. No more marks visible. I got used to the sight of hickeys on my neck. Small round patches of blood under my skin. But it has been a while since Draco's lips touched my skin. I take a deep breath and fully undress. I walk in the shower and a torrent of burning hot water falls on my skin. Goosebumps prominent on my skin now. I take soap and wash myself, I rub my arms and body. I close my eyes and take myself in. I gently touch my breast and let go. I open my eyes and freeze.

I close my eyes again. A stream of warm water on my naked front. I let my hand down my stomach, under my belly button, on myself. I let my fingers slowly slide down my clit. Draco. I can't think of anything else. He's everywhere I am. I close my eyes tighter as I slid my fingers in me. My heart is racing. My finger tips inside me go deeper in. I start moving them in and out of me bending my back slightly. I am slow at first. The hot water on me is making my skin steam up.

I move faster now. I feel strange as I move my fingers where I want to. No teasing. I follow what I need.

I can feel hot air leave my mouth. I take my hand to the wall for support. My eyes clenched together. I bite my lip. Draco. I feel his hands on me. Thoughts of us resurface.

I think of the way he grabs me. The way he pulls and thugs me onto him.

I remember his eyes furrowing when he was in me. He way he held me.

I am dripping now, my hand aching.

With a chocked gasp I reach a weak orgasm. I open my eyes. I stare at the wall in front of me and think of him. Why do I want him like this? Because of a letter?