Written on the Stars

Time can not Erase

(Monica's Pov)

I felt my whole world fell apart in a blink of an eye. I wasn't there to watch her breathe her last breath. I wasn't there to rush her to the hospital. I wasn't there to help her mourn the loss of my father.

I wasn't there was her.

I just wished to kiss her cheek and try to take away the pain that's been devouring her for years.I held Gilbert's limp hand, making sure not to move the I.v. I stuffed my head onto the blankets, trying to hide from my emotions. I peeked my head up at his sleeping face. He looked so young and innocent, yet he was so sickly and pale, his cheekbones stuck out more and his face almost blended in with the pillow.

I did this to him.I left him. I couldn't bear to look at him anymore, only seeing my guilt every time I face him. I quickly walked to the bathroom to be alone. I could see nurses and doctors walking passed me, but It didn't feel real like I was in an agonizing dream, no, a nightmare that I can't seem to wake up, even after I pinched myself numerous times.

I couldn't even make it to the bathroom stall before I sank to my knees on the dirty bathroom floor.My mind was elsewhere and the floor didn't bother me. I leaned my back against the tile wall, watching the ceiling fan go round and round, and the only sound was the vent. I hugged my knees, having them as the only thing to cling to.

I heard the bathroom door open. My head shoot up from my knees, hoping to see my mother.It wasn't. It was just a women with long, curly, brown hair watching me with her concerned green eyes.

"Are you okay?" She gasped, crouching down so she's at my level.

"No," I admitted, staring at the wall in front of me.

She breathed in deeply like she didn't expect me to answer her,"May I ask what happened?" She asked in a motherly voice, something my mother could never speak again.

"M-my mom." I whimpered, putting my face in between my knees, knowing she was looking at me with her piercing green eyes.

She was silent for a minute,"Would you like to get some coffee together?There is a bakery down the street."

I needed to get out of this miserable place filled with sobbing people.I slowly made it to my feet.

"I'm Elizaveta." She smiled, extending her hand.

"Monica." I shook her hand.

__

I laughed. I actually laughed. The thought made me angry, yet I'm proud of myself. I laughed at Elizaveta's joke once more as I sipped my coffee.Her smile brightened my

day a bit.We began to walk back to the hospital room. Fortunately, she never asked about my mom, making me feel more at ease.

The day was rainy and the dark clouds filled the skies. We opened the hospital front doors, holding our coffees. I brought a chocolate muffin for Gilbert if he feels good enough to eat it.

"It was greet meeting you.Here!"She handed me a slip of paper,"You can call anytime you want."Elizaveta smiled as she began to walk to the receptionist, asking for her friend's room. She told me that she was here for her friend with her husband.

I walked into the elevator with about a dozen other people. I stood uncomfortably as a teenager cried over her mother's death. The scene made me sad again and I tried to disappear in the corner.

"Monica! Finally you're back, they kept on stabbing with their needles and I'm peeing nonstop." Gilbert cheered, sitting up more and then holding his head like it hurt.

"Gilbert!" I said, breaking down. I ran over to his bed and lied my head in his chest, my tears staining his black shirt.

"Moni, what happened?"He asked, concerningly, petting my hair that was now messy from the days without showering.

"My mom," I mumbled into his chest."She's dead."

"Oh, Moni." He wrapped his arms my back.I moved my head on his shoulder and he allowed me to cry softly. "I'm sorry." Gilbert kissed the top of my head and held my hand.

"Gilbert."A woman said. I recognized her Hungarian accent. I turned around to see Elizaveta stood by the door, hand and hand with a man with glasses and dark brown hair.

"Monica?"Elizaveta walked over to the bed along with the man.

I quickly wiped my eyes and I sat up on the bed. The man whispered in her ear. "We'll leave you two alone." She said, walking out of the room.

"You know them?"Gilbert asked, hugging me.

"Well, "I began,"I met her in the bathroom and we went out for some coffee."

"In the bathroom?" He laughed. I just noticed that his eyes were brimming with tears.

I ignored his question. I couldn't do it. Anneliese, moving, and Gilbert. I felt everything in my life is slowly fading away like a sick joke from god. I'm going to be the only one left in this world. I couldn't bear to think of that. I was right, Gilbert did lead me down to wonderland like the white rabbit.

But this is far from Wonderland.