Written on the Stars

Apart Of the Stars

I groaned once the phone's ring woke me up in the middle of the night.I turned over and looked at the time. 12:56. Who is calling at this time?

I picked up the phone and pressed it to my ear, "Hello?" I said in a groggy voice.

"Is this Monica Holzmann?"A man's voice was heard from the other line.

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion,"Yes, who is this?"I questioned.

"This is Dr.Maken, your fiance has been in a car crash,"I snapped my eyes wide open and shot up from the bed,"He's currently in the hospital, but we couldn't save him...He's dead."

I was soundless and numb like my emotions swapped away from my body, leaving me just an empty cold shell. I prayed that this was a prank and I would hear laughing from the other line but instead I heard the doctor continue on about something, I stopped listening.

The silence is deafening my ears, the dark is frightening me, my sorrow is gaining upon me, and it hit with a torturous hit to my heart, breaking it into millions of pieces and sending the phone to the ground. Tears ran down my cheeks, making their way to my chin and then dripping on my legs.

Loneliness surrounds me and slowly sucks me into a swirl of emotions, deadly emotions.I struggle to find the air and my chest hurts so badly, yet my emotions overran it.

He's gone, Gilbert's gone, without a goodbye or a warning or a hint, nothing, he left me with nothing but agony. I sobbed while I swung my legs over the bed, landing on the ground and getting up. The world spun around me. I stumbled with every step and I hung to the walls. I walked down the stairs, holding the rail intensely.

I nearly fell over, but I caught myself by the wall. I allowed the sobs to exit my body and I screamed out my heart as tears got so heavy and so much fell out of my eyes that it was like a waterfall.

I tottered out to my car and raced to the hospital in a hurry.

___

I walked into the waiting room and I saw Antonio sitting down with his face in his hands and Felicia's sister, Chiara, sat by him, rubbing his back in a reassuring way.

"Antonio?"I asked through my tears and his head popped up from his hands.

"Monica!"He jumped from his chair, catching Chiara by surprise."What happened? Is everything alright? Is Gilbert okay? They haven't told me yet!"He rushed. Tears, like me, filled his eyes.I took a deep breath and I couldn't find the courage to tell him, but I had to. I couldn't leave him questioning.

"Gilbert,"I took a deep breath. I guessed by Chiara's expression that she caught on. Antonio still held on to the hope that his best friend was still alive."Died."I choked while saying that word.

Antonio's tears finally left his eyes. His sparkle in his green eyes left as he slumped back into his chair, covering his face once more, sobbing.

"Sorry Antonio,"Was all that I managed to say.

" No, no," He whimpered in a childlike voice,"I should have told them to stop."

"What do you mean?"I crouched down in front of him.

"We-we were drinking and Francis asked Alfred to drive so, we did." Antonio poked his head from his hands watching me," I remember hitting my head on the seat and I could only see smoke. I knew that the car was going to catch on fire by the smell. I got out and called 911. I got Francis out,"He mumbled Spanish to himself and continued,"The Ambulance got Gilbert out, I didn't see him at all because they surrounded him and he was put in the ambulance and drive off." I let him take a break for a bit.

"I saw Alfred's body in front of the car. He flew out of the windshield. There was so much blood, so much..."He muttered to himself and I couldn't take watching such a cheerful person broken down in agony.

I walked away once Chiara made a gestured for me to leave.I walked up to the counter and between breaths I asked to see Gilbert. I had to say a final goodbye to him.I couldn't wait until the funeral to see his face even if it wouldn't look the same.

I followed them through the depressing hallways until his room. It was in slow motion as she opened the door to a chilly room.

I saw.

I saw my fiance laying in the bed dead.

It didn't look the books say, he didn't look like he was sleeping. He wasn't peaceful nor did he even look like himself.Burns filled his face and his face was yellow looking. He wasn't the man I loved, just an empty shell. His cheerful soul was gone and the body held no emotion or pain.

Did he feel pain when he died? Did he wish I was there?

I slowly inched closer to him and grabbed his hand. It didn't squeeze back, it wasn't warm and a bit sweaty, it wasn't comforting, it wasn't his.

This can't be happening. Just ten minutes ago I was happy and dreaming of my wedding, now I sob at my fiance's body, wishing that I'll wake up in his arms.

Silence is upon me once again and I wanted to scream to rip through it, I wanted to speak, I wanted to feel emotions, instead I was numb.

Yes, tears leaked from my eyes, but I didn't feel anything like it was a dream. This is a dream, a nightmare.

"Gilbert!"I bursted into tears, hugging him without any thoughts in my mind. I cried on his chest, feeling myself quickly wither away.

"Gilbert, I love you, I love you..."I repeated over and over to the empty shell until I couldn't speak.

"Ms. Holzmann?"The doctor stood at the door, watching me. I would always be called that. Never will Mrs. Beilschmidt pass anyone's lips.

"Would you like to know how he died?"He said. I could hear his footsteps come closer.

"Yes," I mumbled.

"Once the ambulance got there they found him in the passinger seat with his head resting on the boling dashboard passed out. He wasn't dead yet and we quickly got him on the stecher and in the ambulance, but he died before he got here.We tried our best to revive him, we're sorry..."He finished.

It took minutes that felt like hours before I spoke,"What about my friends?"I asked.

He breathed deeply,"The driver, Alfred Jones, died imminently, Francis Bonnefoy has a minor concussion, Antonio has whiplash."

I couldn't take it. My fiance, the one who I want to marry so badly, died so suddenly in a painful car crash. I have to live on without him in my life anymore and I have to raise a baby all by myself. The baby wouldn't have a father. Also, my best friend, who had so many dreams and was so young, died because of the dangerous alcohol.

I looked up at the sky, ignoring the doctor who was sighing papers. The stars looked so bright, but one looked so much brighter than the rest.