FutsuYuri: I Wanted To Reincarnate Normally!! Not In This Yuri Game!!

Chapter 61

Nikami POV

"Raijin."

"Ye-yea??"

With all of the emotions overflowing inside of me, I dashed towards Raijin, embracing her tightly as my muffled sobs echoed out the room. 

"I hate it… I hate it... What am I feeling? It prickles... It aches… It eats me away… But somehow, I want to protect this feeling? It's… It's so sweet… Raijin… I… I don't know what to do…" I looked up at her, all of the things I have so desperately hiding from people outside that door, the moment I made Yasachu sit on my lap made me want to touch the main character even more. 

"I don't… Understand…" Despite me feeling irritated when Raijin says anything, Shukona and Raijin are really the only people I trust with my weaknesses. 

"Ni-Nika?! Are, are you crying?! Nika-" Raijin, surprised at my sudden lunge, stumbled back as she looked down at me and stared at my eyes. Biting her lip, she hugged me back and used her sleeves to wipe some of my tears off. 

"Seriously… It scares me so much when you look blank and then just burst out in tears like this, I guess the main character really outdone herself… How did you even hide this? Is the curse gone or something?" Raijin spoke with a slight glare to the side, feeling like her heart just got covered in poisoned thorns. 

"The effect is slowly fading… Since it's nearly the end of the day, perhaps it's automatic…" I mumbled. 

"I think I know, you know… The uh, emotion stuff… I have played through Nikami's route... And she doesn't understand emotions... Since she has lost most of them a long time ago... Nika, what you are feeling right now… It's love. Romantic love, I mean…" Raijin spoke out, a bitter taste came into her mouth as she said that. 

The sin of envy really is such a bad feeling. 

"I... I know... I just… Never thought it would happen so soon... The first day isn't even over yet… I don't… I just don't understand… This damned game… I don't.... I don't want to feel such a horrible feeling…" I sniffled, whimpering as I looked up at Raijin that was wiping some of my tears off.

"Raijin… Why do you look so pained? Don't make such a scary face." I stared at her complexion, asking a question as I stopped my tracks. Somehow, seeing her like this, made me feel more sad for her than my own current problems. 

"I just…-" She paused. 

"O-of course I would feel horrible! You're crying! You're my best friend, even in my last life and this current one. Seeing you like this... I would slice my own stomach if it would make your pain stop... " Raijin looks away for a moment, as if guilty of something. Yes, it is painful. Telling the person you have loved for 2 different lives they are falling in love with someone that wasn't you. 

"Are you not jealous?"

"Huh?"

"You look like you're jealous."

"Wh-why would I be?!" Raijin yelled out. 

"We're rivals, of course… In love and in magic… If I'm falling in love with her right now, and even Shu seems like she is as well… You're in love with her too, aren't you?" I tried to make sense of what she was feeling, thinking that I was right. 

"Huh? No, I'm not." A quick reply came out of her mouth. 

"What?"

"We-well! The protagonist is cute and all, but honestly, I can't say I'm in love with her… She's loyal, kinda like a dog… Yea, she kinda seems like a little sister to me more than anything." Raijin spoke out slowly, answering me. 

"That's… That's not how you're supposed to feel, Raijin feels the need to protect the protagonist and be her prince charming… Little sister…? That's the first time I have ever heard of that, I have played through her route and…" I mumbled, slowly pulling away from Raijin and gasped as I got an idea. 

"Wait! How did you not fall in love with her?! Maybe, JUST... maybe I could go against this world and stop this feeling of coded love… What did you do?" I asked her, wiping away my own tears as I took a deep breath to calm down. 

"I mean, I really didn't do anything to take note of…" Raijin shrugged, placing her hand on her pockets and sighed. 

"Before that, you need to calm down. Okay? A burst of emotion while thinking can really affect your mind, or something, I don't know." She sat on my bed and gestured for me to sit beside her. Raijin was never good at dealing with something like this. To be honest, it was more of Shukona's role. It isn't really her fault, they haven't been together for years, both of them has changed. So of course she couldn't deal with this. 

"No, I don't need to calm down, I'm fine. I'm fine, Raijin. Just tell me everything you did that wasn't in the game-" I quickly switched back to my blank look, walking over to my desk and getting a notebook.

Before I could even put my hands on one, Raijin stood up and grabbed my hands. 

"Let go." I glared at her. 

"Fuck you, and fuck no, you literally just cried, you either rest or I'm forcing you to. What's with you and your quick change of face? I don't get how someone could force all of their emotions down... " She pulled my wrist and made me face her. 

I tried to struggle away from her, but she was stronger than me physically, and with that, I couldn't. 

"Fine. I'll rest. But you'll have to tell me everything. Now let me go. " I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Deal." She gave a flashy and satisfied grin then let me go, now walking back to the bed and laid down. 

"I mean, I didn't really do anything that changed too much of the game I guess… Being best friends of Shu, maybe? But you are as well… So dunno where you are going with this." She placed her hands behind her head and looked over at me. 

"Troupes… That has always helped me in this world… Just like Kiyu-sama's problems… And my own backstory itself is the typical «I don't feel emotions and when I do I get confused»… Should have known, this world is just a game after all, of course it's filled with troupes... A love potion given to someone, and it doesn't work… Ah? Is it because you are already in love with someone?" I asked Raijin, walking towards the bed and sitting down on it. Thinking as I did so. 

"KH-" Raijin shot up, she seemed surprised and baffled, making noises like she was choking on her own spit. Her face was even redder than her cape. Seeing that she was making these noises, she covered her mouth and her entire face. 

"I see. So I was right." I nodded, understanding why she acted that way. 

 "I just have to fall in love with someone that isn't the protagonist… Or be stuck with this coded love for that commoner… Ugh, both of those options suck. Can't I just not get forced to be like this? This is dumb. I hate this world." I whined for a while, before clearing my throat and glanced over at Raijin. 

And it seems like the prince(ss) has made a fortress inside my bed. 

"Hah. And what does the Crowned Prince of the Adventurine kingdom have in business with my blankets? Miss Rival in a burrito." I scoffed, chuckling softly at her strange behavior. 

With the blankets that was on the bed, Raijin wrapped herself up in them. Only her face was shown, and when she saw me glance back at her, she got inside of the blankets. Nowhere to be seen.

"Is it really so bad to fall in love with someone? I don't necessarily care about something like that, however, I hope it wouldn't get in the way of our engagement. Either we both like it or not, if the protagonist doesn't choose one of us, we'll get married as planned." I sighed, now starting to move along and sat on the side of Raijin that was inside the blanket burrito. 

"That's not the problem at all…" A mutter came from inside. 

"Curious, who is the person you like? As I said earlier, I do not care about such matters… However, it would be great to know in advance who to watch out for when we get married." I spoke right away, glancing at the blankets and poking at it.