wait for me [illumi zoldyck]

57. Firsts and Lasts

Mia

"You better miss me."

Kyser smiles busing himself to the other end of my bedroom. He sits on an armchair near the small bookshelf he installed for me a few months back. Now, that memory feels distant, as though it happened ages ago. I was so angry at Kyser for every little thing, back then.

I'm half grateful that he chose to accompany me to my room after Cyrus left me with some time to collect my belongings. Strangely, I feel quite sad at the thought of leaving Kyser here all alone, when he has taken care of me for so long. I've become used to my daily routine on this cove, sharing my meals with Kyser and learning to use my magic. There were long periods during the day that I would spend alone, seeing as Kyser had other duties to fulfill, tending to other spirits.

"Don't think you can get rid of me that easily," Kyser chuckles, hiding a smile behind his hand as he watches me open drawers to collect my belongings. Anything I have has been gifted to me by Kyser, so I don't have much, to begin with. On my bed, a small pile of books and clothing grows.

A small smile finds its way to my face at his words.

"Will you visit me often?" I ask, chuckling softly. However, I feel a sad twist in the pit of my stomach, knowing that Cyrus is the only immortal who can freely travel between realms. Kyser will not be able to visit me as easily as he makes it seem. Instead, I expect that he will come to me in spirit form, just as he did when he served as my nen spirit.

Kyser continues to watch me, nodding softly. His purple eyes follow my every movement. As much as he tries to hide it, I can tell that he feels sad as well. 

"How do you feel? Finally being able to return, I mean," Kyser asks, sitting back in the armchair. He tilts his head back, staring up at the white ceiling absentmindedly, waiting for me to respond.

I shrug, pulling out a cotton tote from the bottom drawer of my dresser. Carefully, I begin to place the items from my bed into the bag.

I certainly feel happy that I am finally returning. I miss Illumi and my family more than anyone can imagine. However, accompanied by a feeling of melancholy, I can't help but feel uncertain of the entirety of this situation. I don't doubt that Cyrus will take me back to the mortal realm, yet I feel that there must be more to it. Certainly, a spirit like myself should not be able to roam freely as a human. I am meant to be dead, in either Heaven or Hell. 

"It feels unreal like there's some sort of catch to all of this," I admit, placing the packed tote against the dresser near the door. I round the bed and sit down on it, right in front of Kyser. "I feel like this is all too good to be true."

Kyser closes his eyes, breathing deeply. "The Creator will surely come looking for you," he murmurs, pinching the skin between his brows. "He did the exact same thing when Rene was taken away by Cyrus, all those years ago. Once he notices a spirit straying from where it belongs, and nothing being done about it, he'll come take a look for himself. "

"Cyrus never mentioned anything about that..."

Kyser sits up in his seat, shrugging. Although his nonchalant demeanor does nothing to rid of the look of worry in his violet eyes. "Rest assured, Cyrus will protect you. I'm certain that he would not choose to bring you back to the mortal realm if there was a possibility that you'd be harmed. He is a smart man."

I shift uneasily, fingers fidgeting on my lap. Despite his reassurance, I still can't help the feeling of uneasiness from stirring within my chest. I cannot do anything to avoid the undesirable encounter I will have to have with the Creator. Whether I stay with Kyser, or go back home with Cyrus, the Creator will come looking for me at some point.