Love Don't Cost A Thing

31.

Meredith and Derek just stayed in bed all day. Meredith never went back to sleep. She just lay there, letting the wounds recently open try to heal. And Derek lay next to her, letting her pretend to not be crying, but actually crying. And he knew she never fell asleep. And there as no need. It was the day time.

He was proud of her for telling him, but felt slightly guilty that she had to tell it...remember it.

Meredith had loved Ben, her little baby brother. So innocent...and he had to die that way. Molested, raped by a stranger.

Meredith still felt guilty that she hadn't been there. If she had been there, she probably would have noticed he had been in there a long time...and could have went in there to check on him and probably stop they guy...whoever he was. And maybe Ben would still be alive.

The one time she hadn't been there with Ben...that happens.

It was unfortunate and horrible.

And she wondered if that guy was still out there...if he had done anymore damage to people.

She wished that she could just forget it all. Ben, Charles and what he could have done to her, was so close to doing to her.

But she had fought. She had been old enough, strong enough to fight, the one thing that Ben hadn't been able to do. And she had gotten some inguries, but they weren't severe and she would heel from them, unlike Ben, who had been 5, small and unable to protect himself.

She was lucky. And Ben hadn't been lucky.

And for that, she felt the most guilty of all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was the next day. Meredith was still in the same position it had been before. She wanted to forget, boy, she wanted to forget. But it was hard. Damn, she needed tequila....jose sounded really good right then.

But she laid there instead. Even though she didn't want to admit it, she knew the best way to get over this or to get better from this was to do it sober.

And now her friends were over. They were entering her room where Derek had her cuddled to his chest.

She looked up at her friends with tired eyes.

"Hey..." Cristina, Mark and Izzie all said softly.

"Hey." Derek sighed.

Meredith didn't reply. She wasn't in a "hey" mood.

"Um...we've got the homework you've missed...you can do it, when you feel up to it..." Cristina said as she cleared her throat.

"And we have yours to, Derek." Mark added as both Cristina and Mark put two piles on the floor. Derek groaned, but Meredith just stared at the homework with a blank expression.

"How is she?" Izzie asked Derek.

"Not good...when Ellis was up here a couple days after it happened, Meredith still wouldn't let her touch her." Derek said sadly.

"Mer..." Cristina said cautiously, slowly putting her hand towards her.

"Don't." Meredith said loudly, hysterically as scooted closer to Derek, pulling his arms tighter to her.

They all sighed and Cristina dropped her hand.

"How's it at school?" Derek asked as he soothingly rubbed Meredith's back. Her face was buried deep in his chest.

"Oh, everyone's talking..." Izzie sighed sadly as she sat on the side of the bed, next to Cristina. "It's been on the news too...but it was just a minor story....it's all blown over on the news. And Ellis actually went to the news station and told them where they could stick their camera's..." Izzie said, her eyes a little wide.