He was trying to make peace with his past.
So was she.
James Barnes and Anastasia Morozov were similar in many ways, and possibly the only people on the planet who understood each other. Both having a past with HYDRA and experiments, being used and...
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*warning, mention and discussion of suicide attempt*
bucky
Talking to Yori, telling him what I had done to his son was the hardest thing I ever had to do.
"I didn't have a choice."
I don't know if he could ever forgive me, and as much as I wanted him to I didn't expect that of him. I had killed his son, and that was a pain I never hoped to experience. But there was a possibility that I could, if Ana and I were to have a family...
That was a risk I would take, if she would take it with me.
Yori had been the last name in my book, in Steve's book, which I had left with Raynor, a note in a small bag with the book. I thanked her, and left it at as few words as possible. That meant I only had one thing left to do...
Go to Ana.
Talk to Ana once more.
Be with her.
So why was I hesitating at her door? My hand was raised to knock on the wood, but instead my palm rested on its surface. What if she had changed her mind again? What if she thought the potential hurt didn't outweigh the potential good?
I didn't have time to talk myself out of it as the door opened, Ana staring up at me with tired eyes and a small smile on her face.
"He deserved a happy ending, I'm not sure I do."
"We are what we think, I believe that I'm starting to learn that now. As long as you think you don't deserve anything, it won't come to you."
When I had found her in my apartment I knew everything was going to be different, I never could have guessed how much would change.
"And I guess I still don't really know who you are. I mean, we've talked once... outside of me being the Winter Soldier I mean. I kind of jumped into trusting you, I don't know why."
"Our similar backgrounds probably. I struggle to trust people as well."
I guess I found out the reason I trusted her so quickly, our past together.
"Your metal arm, it's Wakandan... can you feel it?" Anastasia asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Like if I were to touch your arm..." She reached out and brushed her fingers on my metal arm. "Do you feel that?" She asked as my body shivered at the touch.
"Uh..."
I hadn't known what to say after that, because I had been so distracted by how gently she had touched my arm. That was the first physical contact I'd had after Thanos, and before that there had been so little that I had felt deprived. And then to have Ana, the most beautiful person I had ever laid eyes on touch me so carefully was nearly overwhelming.
