《Don't give up on me 》- 1

33.

////// Il est recommandé de lire cette partie avec la composition ci dessus, il suffit d'appuyer sur le triangle//////

Bonne lecture💕

Je prends mon courage à deux mains et commence a lire cette lettre.

" Dear Husband,

First, I'm going to give you a few indications you'll need for your own good. Amani hates onions, don't even try to put some in her meal she won't eat it. But my baby loves mushrooms, I know she's weird right?
When she's mad or upset and that she starts crying, just let her brother hug her, it helps her a lot, otherwise she'll get a headache.
She loves to change hairstyles every week, but don't forget when you brush her hair, always start with the end. She also seems to love cars and Motorsport; I can see her sometimes watching it in secret. She's obsessed with wheels. But please limit her screen time, my baby's smart, and too young to be obsessed with electronics. About my little prince now, he'll eat everything you'll prepare, but keep it healthy. If he's upset, just be patient, even if it takes time, he'll end up talking and sharing with you. I would say that before you came into his life, he was very calm, in a withdrawn way. But that changed with you, he became more open. Babe, I'm sorry to break your heart, but I don't think he likes football. So, you better not push him with your project Mbappé!
Now Ismaël, you must be asking yourself why I started with those indications. Because if you're reading this letter, something must've happened to me, and I couldn't tell you this myself. And I know that you must be extremely tense right now. So before reading the rest of this letter, just breath my love.
Ismaël, you of all people know that words aren't my specialty, maybe that's why I decided to write a letter. I'm sorry, I'm sorry I couldn't share my feelings like you do, I'm sorry for how I acted those past months, I don't want to blame the tumor for it. But mostly I'm sorry for keeping the twins a secret. Cause they've never been happier, cause I've never been happier since you're here.
I've said horrible things to you, things I didn't mean, things I will always regret for saying.
At first, I wished we could forget everything, forget those last five years, forget those difficult months, forget the lies, the secrets and just remember the happy moments we had. And that was naive of me, cause it looks like life doesn't work like this.
I know things always have an end, this life is just a test and ephemeral. Things always change and I guess, if I'm being really honest, it scares me. I don't want to forget about those difficult moments anymore, cause they made us, they made the people we are today, and remind me how strong our love is. Cause Ismaël, you were my first and you'll be my last. My first kiss, my first lover, my first everything. And you came back in my life at my most vulnerable moment and forgot everything to take care of me. The thing is, since the beginning of our relationship you consumed me, and you still do. I have no words to describe how much I love you, and how those years without you were difficult. And this is it, this is the reason why accepting my fate Is so painful, cause what I have for you is so strong that I don't want to go. I don't want to go Ismaël, I don't want to leave, I don't want to disappear. I'm not afraid of dying, I'm afraid of being separated from you and the kids. Cause I love you and our children with every fiber of my heart, and I can't imagine a world without you. So maybe it's a good thing I'm the one dying. Wow i tried to make a joke, but you know me, sorry not funny. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry if I didn't tell you this more often, I'm sorry if I made us lose time. And I just wish we had more time. I'm also sorry that I'm crying right now, and that my tears are wiping off what I'm writing. So let me end this letter which is already long enough before I get another migraine, by telling you that you'll be fine. You and the kids are going to be okay. You'll get through this, and not alone, cause you have and will always have our 2 beautiful babies, they're the living symbol of our love. So please Ismaël, I'm asking you, don't shut yourself off, continue to express your feelings, just stay how you are. Show them that it's okay to not be okay, and that it's okay to cry. Goodbye Ismo, we have said goodbye before, but now we'll have to wait for a little longer period of time before we say hello again. And you know why?  Cause we're meant to be, so May Allah reunite us, and if it's not here, in heaven. I love you.

         Amy"