Descend Upon Your Service (LLS #1) Completed✓

31

After that night, I felt like I was dead. Para akong nakalubog sa lupa kahit nakakalakad ako nang normal.

"Huy, pre. Ano bang nangyayari sa 'yo? Kagabi ka pa tulala."

A lot of them noticed my actions, but I don't care. It felt like a part of my body was taken from me. That part has a huge function in my life... my heart.

Katumbas ni Eya ang halaga ng puso ko. Ngayong wala na siya sa piling ko, para akong namatay at tila kaluluwa na lamang. I didn't even want to continue my life anymore that day. Pakiramdam ko'y bawat segundong dumadagdag sa oras, siya ring dagdag sa bigat na nadarama ko.

While mourning for my almost dead body, I saw a pen and a paper at the top of a table. Hindi ko alam kung anong naisipan ko noong mga oras na iyon at bigla ko na lamang hinablot ang dalawang bagay na iyon.

I just found myself writing at that piece of paper. I didn't even noticed that I was writing my feelings for Eya that time.

Hinayaan ko na lamang ang palad ko na gawin ang gusto nito para kahit papaano'y mabawasan nang kaunti ang nararamdaman ko.

"Tangina mo! Anong nangyari kay Eya? Pinagkatiwalaan kita, Zach! Akala ko matino ka. B-Bakit ganoon ang nangyari sa k-kapatid ko. Bakit, Z-Zach?"

I didn't even know what to say, what to do. I just stared at Emma while crying in front of me. I just felt a tear fell from my right eye after hearing those words.

"T-Tangina, Zach. Kapatid ko 'yon! K-Kapatid ko 'yon..."

Napalunok ako nang mariin nang maramdaman kong bumabara na ang lalamunan ko dahil sa pagpipigil sa mga luhang gustong kumawala. I can sense her love for her sister.

"Zach, kapatid ko 'yon! K-Kahit palagi kaming nagbabangayan n'on, kahit palagi niya akong barahin, kahit palagi niya akong asarin... o inggitin, okay lang sa 'kin. Basta ligtas at masaya siya, okay na ako."

Para akong napipi at nabingi noong mga oras na iyon habang pinapakinggan ang mga sinasabi ni Emma. I can still remember the day when we had an agreement that she will not tell Eya about my identity. Gusto ko kasing ako rin mismo ang magsasabi.

"I... I'm sorry."

Those were the only words that had left my mouth during that time. Pakiramdam ko'y kapag nagsalita o gumalaw man lang ako, mas masasaktan ko si Eya.

I handed her the letter that I made for Eya. Akala ko'y iyon na ang huling beses na manggugulo ako sa buhay ni Eya, but I found myself writing a letter for her as the days passed by.

I shared everything that happened to me everyday without her.

Nagsimula akong magtrabaho sa Grab gaya ng plano ko ngunit hindi iyon naging madali. I think I had encountered almost 30 fake bookings. Mas nalugi pa ako, pero wala akong magagawa.

Muntikan pa akong ma-holdap habang naghahatid ng pasahero. That passenger was literally a carnaper. I can still remember the fear that I felt while a knife was pointed in my belly. Luckily, he just took my phone and money away, and let me at least have my car.

"Kuya Zach, 'wag ka nang malungkot! Hiramin mo na lang muna ang cellphone ko, oh. Hihiram na lang ako kay Ate Elle, hindi naman din ako mahilig diyan." Chloe smiled while handing me her phone.

That was when I realized, I still have them. Hindi pa natatapos ang buhay ko dahil mayroon pang sila. Nariyan pa sila. At that moment, I started to build myself again.

Abot-langit ang kabang nararamdaman ko habang nakaupo sa harapan nila Pat, Krishia, Maxene. They reached me out to talk about Eya. Nasa Starbucks kami noong panahong iyon.