Maybe We Were Meant to Be (Tay Jardine and Jenna Mcdougall)

First Date

Hayley:

I sat in front of a gorgeous brunette with great eyebrows, with a coffee in her hand. She was laughing at a joke I had just told her. It really seemed like we were hitting it off. I had that first feeling of butterflies in my stomach sitting there. This might have been just what I needed and I found it just at the right time. I no longer was overly attached to Jenna and I had decided I was ready to move on. I didn't feel like this would be a rebound relationship.

The bookstore wasn't the first time I had seen her. We had met at a Paramore show a few years ago. She told me she was a huge fan and that I was a huge inspiration to her. I had heard it a million times, but I always loved it. It was the beginning of her career, but I could sense she was going to make it in the crazy thing called the music industry.

She waved her hand in front of my face with a big smile. "What are you thinking about so hard?" she asked.

"The first time we met." I replied, returning her smile.

"Last week in the book store?" she seemed perplexed.

"No. You came to a meet and greet in...2008? That was you right?"

"Oh, yeah it was. I didn't think you'd have remembered, especially after all this time." she had a shy little smile like I had made her day by remembering that event.

"I try and remember as many people that we meet as possible and it was a lot easier back when we were starting out and didn't have as many fans at every show."

"Even back then you had already released 'Misery Business' and 'Decode'. Do you regret writing 2 songs for that movie?"

"Twilight? Of course not. Why would I? That was our huge break."

"The movie doesn't really promote a healthy relationship." she said with disapproval.

"I'm not one to talk about healthy relationships." I replied in a low shameful tone.

"Why not?" she asked, surprised.

I regretted letting the words slip from my mouth. I debated for a minute if I should tell her or not. "I...um...I cheated on my last girlfriend and had a lot of trouble getting over her when she left me."

She looked at me first in shock, then worry. "I would never have suspected that. You're over her now? Please tell the truth I really don't want to get into another pointless relationship."

"I am completely over her. I've been going to a therapist to patch up any holes that may have been left too. Wow, this has probably been one of the most revealing dates I've ever been on. You must think I'm crazy."

"Don't worry, I know all about being in therapy. It isn't as bad as so many people make it out to be and it isn't only for people with mental illnesses. I don't think you're crazy now."

I took a pause. I didn't know where to take this conversation, I could ask her how her recovery was going, but I didn't want to offend her or bring back memories of the big scandal. She must have read from my expression what I was thinking about. "Don't worry I'm over cutting. I got help for my bipolar now."

"Wait, you're bipolar?" I asked puzzled. I had figured she was just depressed or overwhelmed by the stress of success and that had caused her troubles. I didn't do any digging into the matter because I liked to let people have their privacy, but ut seemed like she was very open about her illness.

"You hadn't heard that part of the story? Yeah, but I'm recovered. It's also more polite to say 'you have bipolar' our disorders don't define us unless we let them."

I blushed "Oh sorry, I meant no offense. My ex's new girlfriend was recently diagnosed as well. Maybe you could help them out with it. I haven't heard from them recently, but last time I talked with them they were barely hanging in there."

"You keep in touch with your ex? The one you were so hung up on?" she once again didn't seem thrilled by the news.

"Yeah. Jenna and I still talk. Our bands have to finish touring together sometime."

"It doesn't sound like you talk strictly about business." she said in an un-easy voice.

We were really getting a rocky start. I guess it was better to clear the air up now than let it be discovered later. "I've managed to stay friends with her. We aren't too close, but sometimes she needs a shoulder to cry on other than her male band mates. I promise you I am over any romantic feelings"

"I guess I'll trust you. We don't need to start off with secrets and mistrust. If I'm around when you talk to them again I'll try and give some advice. The change between euphoria and suicidal can be really difficult. Even more so because it isn't as people think that it is one minute we feel happy the next sad, you can spend weeks feeling amazing and then the next day all you can do is cry and that can last weeks or even months." her eyebrows were pressed tightly together at the memories, she didn't look too happy to recall those feelings.

"That sounds rough. Can we change the subject to something a little more light hearted?"

"Of course..."

We finished our coffees and sat for a little while longer talking. I was really enjoying her company, but unfortunately we both had other things to do. I told Demi goodbye and crossed my fingers hoping she would call me soon or answer when I called her. I felt like something very good could come from this.