Maybe We Were Meant to Be (Tay Jardine and Jenna Mcdougall)

The End Is Where We Begin

Tay:

I sat on the bed wishing Jenna was here with me. I knew she was just in the other room, but the emotional distance between us made the physical distance seem to be so much more. I would do anything right now to get her back by my side. I had been complying to the doctors orders just so I could have her back.

It had been 3 weeks that I had been taking the pills and so far I was feeling pretty good. It wasn't as bad as I had thought it would be, I didn't feel like a completely different person, I just felt like a normal me, a really happy me. Despite the bad situation I was caught up in I was feeling okay, in fact, I was feeling great.

I had a certain feeling I would be able to convince Jenna we needed to be together. There was nothing I was more sure of. I had a ton of great ideas about how I could do it, but every time I started one of them I couldn't stick to it because I wanted to start another. There was sheet after sheet of crumpled paper of fractions of songs. I had started trying to make a sketch of Jenna, a clay figurine, a photo album, an apology letter and many other things.

I told Jenna how sorry I was for putting her through all I had everyday. I also told her how glad I was that she had kept me on the meds. I kept her updated on how I was feeling. I tried to make her feel included in my life, if I let her become anymore disconnected I knew I'd loose her completely. She didn't seem to resist at all, but there was no progress. She made me feel disconnected from her. I was getting a little fed up with it.

"Jenna, can we talk?"

"What's going on Tay?"

"I've been making so much effort to open up to you, but you refuse to do the same. I want to know what's going on in your head? I want things to get better and I think the only way that can work is through communication from both of us."

"To have a healthy relationship you do need to always communicate, but you broke that connection. I was there for you and you distanced yourself from everyone. Not even your band mates knew you then."

"That was the past. I'm taking the medication and I am feeling better. Can't we go back to before all that happened? Or start over completely?"

"How can I know your not lying and hiding your true feelings for my sake? You could be back in the hospital tomorrow."

"I would strip right here and show you that I haven't hurt myself, if that would prove anything. I am of both sound mind and body."

Jenna took a second to think. She nervously cleared her throat. I don't think she believed me and she wasn't sure she wanted to call my bluff. "Fine. do it."

I felt belittled having to do it, but at this point I didn't care. I was bare except for my bra and panties. I saw Jenna looking over every inch of my skin, she even got up to check my back. She seemed surprised that I was infact getting better. I smiled as she looked back up at my face. "I told you. I'm really trying. Things can work out."

"I still don't feel the same towards you. I still love you, but it's not how it was. I can't pretend none of this happened." she said disappointingly.

"Well then let's start over. May I take you on a date tonight?" I asked hopefully.

"It's worth a shot. I would love to go out with you." she smiled, I felt my heart lighten and almost fly away.

I skipped down the hall to start getting ready and hummed happy tunes as I put on my make up and got dressed. I was going to make the next few weeks the best of Jenna's life. I had to get her back. I knew she and I were meant to be together. We were perfect together.