365 Days of You

Chapter 12

Mina can't help but compare the night sky to her own state of mind. Just like these clouds, her mind is in a chaos.

Something is eating at her, worrying her, aching inside of her.

She tries to pinpoint the cause of this feeling.

Those eyes. The hurt behind them.

She thought this is another game to her, that Nayeon is going to get bored and give up on this charade sooner or later.

If it is only a game, then why did she see the hurt lingering in those arresting dark eyes? It couldn't have been her imagination.

And she definitely hasn't imagined her own heart aching at the sight of it either.

She tries to recall their last encounter, she needs that moment to ground herself to reality whenever her resolve slips.

Nayeon offered to pay for sex. She offered to pay her off with money for falling in love with her.

Mina has to bite her lip to keep from crying out.

She is over this.

She isn't going to waste her tears over someone who has no place in her life anymore, someone who treated her like she is nothing.

You felt nothing for me Nayeon, why do you pretend to care now? She asks herself.

She leans her head back on the couch.

Somedays she feels everything at once.

Every single moment with Nayeon, every single touch, every single glance and in those days she wants to laugh at people who says pain lulls over time.

Somedays she feels nothing at all.

This emptiness, this void, a heavy feeling constricting her heart in its walls, making it suffocate, rot inside with a wound that never heals and in those days she wonders just how much longer it would go on beating.

Nayeon has said she loves her.

Why now? Does she suddenly miss her sex worker after six months?

She scoffs mentally. Surely Nayeon has a million people queuing up her door if she wants a shag.

That thought alone makes her slightly annoyed and she doesn't know why.

Or perhaps, she knows why but isn't ready to acknowledge it, face the demons she's trying to keep at bay.

She has to face the demons she's running away from when she sees Nayeon after two weeks with a man in her arms.

Two weeks of expecting to see her with every ding of the bell, and a feeling of relief at the thought that Nayeon has finally dropped this game.

Two weeks of letting Nayeon escape her mind, only for her to spin her world on its axis just at the sight of her like it is nothing at all.

She sees the singer's eyes widen in surprise when her gaze lands on her. She sees a mixture of emotions on the face she once loved so much.

She sees hurt, surprise and confusion.

And something else that's tender she can't put a name to.

Mina clears her throat and drops her gaze after a moment.

She browses through the store, carefully avoiding bumping into Nayeon.

Out of the corner of her eye, she sees the man the older girl is with whispering sweet nothings into her ear. She hears her laugh.