Trust, Love, and Lost Relations

You Make me Strong

Felicity's P.O.V.
I was shaken awake the next morning, hearing a voice in my ear. "Felicity, wake up," it whispered. I groaned and rolled over, trying to go back to bed.

"Felicity," it said again, I stayed where I was. I'm tired, I just wanna sleep. "Felicity," it said louder. I finally woke up enough to realize that it was Chris.

I gave up on falling asleep again, and rolled over. I rubbed my eyes and looked at him. "Hi," I mumbled, my voice cracking a little, due to just waking up. I cleared my throat.
"Hey," he said back.
"Why are you here?" I asked him curiously.
"I heard about what happened with Niko," he said gently.
"Who told you about that?" I asked him.
"Clarissa might have mentioned something," he said sheepishly.
"Of course she did," I mumbled, annoyed. Not everyone needed to know about that. "So, what does Niko have to do with you being here?" I asked him.

"How are you?" He asked.
"I'm good, you?" I asked, confused. That had nothing to do work this conversation...

"No," he said." That's not what I meant." What? I looked at him, confused. "I mean," he started, "how are you?" I still looked at him confused. "In regards to the jackass situation." Oh! Duh! I can be so dumb sometimes.

"I'm ok," I lied.
"You're a liar," he pointed out.
"No I'm not," I denied.
"Yes you are."
"No I'm not."
"Are too."
"Am not."
"Are too."
"I am not."

"How are you?" He asked again, more seriously. I didn't really wanna tell him. See, the issue with me is that I don't like people to worry about me. At all. I will avoid telling people stuff as much as possible, because my problems are not their problems to deal with.

"I'm fine." I lied again.
"I wish you would quit lying to me," he said, still trying to get it out of me.

"There's nothing to tell," I lied again. He gave me a look that said 'stop lying, I just want to help.' I looked at him again. I debated this for a few minutes. Should I tell him? He seems pretty worried...

"Are you ok?" He looked at me again.
"No," I said honestly.
"You wanna talk about it?" He asked.
"No, not really."
"Well, too bad." Dammit! I was hoping he'd let me get away with it. Ha! Yeah, good luck with that, I laughed to myself.

"I just..." I paused for a second, trying to think of what to say. "I just don't know why." I finally decided to say. He looked at me, giving me a look saying to elaborate.

"Why he all of a sudden wants back in my life. He was gone for the longest time, I thought I was over him. And then he just comes waltzing in, pretending that he cares, and trying to win me back. I just got my brother back for fuck's sakes, why the hell would he come back now?" I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. Oh no, don't do this now. I decided to finish, even if I did end up crying. No one else is awake, so I should be good, and I don't plan on actually crying.

"It almost worked again," I admitted, although I really didn't want to. "Luckily Zayn walked in when he did, and I had an excuse to hang up. It was different this time." I said, using it as an excuse. "He was saying stuff like he would do anything to get me back and he explained himself for the last time, although I don't know of that was true or not." My eyesight was getting blurry. I stopped talking for a minute, blinking quickly to stop the tears from falling.

After I decided the tears would stay away for the time being, I started again. " He's learning which buttons to press and what to say to get to me. This time it's gonna be really hard to say no, but I also  think I have a better chance this time than all the other times."

"So, what's the problem?" He asked, obviously very confused and trying really hard to understand. He's a good friend; he's really sweet in these situations, even if he isn't most other times.

"The problem is that I'm freaking out because I don't know if I'll be able to say no this time either, and I don't want my heart smashed into even more pieces." I said, the tears coming back. Jesus, when did I become such a wimp?

"Hey," he said, trying to get my attention. I didn't look at him. "Hey," he repeated, "look at me." I looked at him and he immediately seen the tears in my eyes. He quickly pulled me into a tight hug. "It's gonna be ok," he said, "you'll get through this." He hugged me tighter. That's when I broke down.

I was so sick of this jackass coming into my life, and yet, every time he does, I fall for him all over again. Every single fucking time.

Chris and I sat there hugging each other tightly for about another half an hour, until I finally stopped crying. I looked up and seen his shoulder was badly tear stained. "I'm sorry," I said, feeling horrible.

"It's fine," he said, "I'll just get a clean shirt." Chris had his own clothes here just in case he ever needed them. Most of it was just stuff he forgot to take home with him when he slept over.

After he finished changing his shirt, (in the bathroom, he doesn't like changing in front of people)  he looked at me seriously and said "now you have to make me breakfast." I grinned at him, glad he wasn't treating me like I was made of glass after spilling my guts to him, and nodded.

"Ok, sounds good." I smiled at him. "What do you want?" I asked him.
"Pancakes!" He shouted, excited.
"Alright, I think I can do that."

We were about to walk out the door and head downstairs when I heard rushed footsteps in the hall, as if someone was trying to run/tiptoe away. I looked up and down the hall and seen that everyone's doors were closed, and that there was no sound from any of the bedrooms.

Obviously someone heard our conversation, well if you could call it that. I was determined to find out who, but decided that that was a mission for another day. I walked down to the kitchen and started the pancakes.

I was trying not to think about it, but the whole time I was cooking, I was wondering who would intrude on a personal moment like that. I was vulnerable, and now someone knows about it. It can't be Clarissa, because she already knows, and she wouldn't try to run away. So, the only other option is that one of the boys has now seen me vulnerable. I can only hope he keeps it to himself, because that's one part of my past that I don't want anyone to know about.

It's one secret that I'd like to keep personal, and now someone has the power to completely ruin that. I can only hope that he keeps it to himself...