Her.

Sixty Three.

Pandora sighs, "It's nice to see London brings you joy." A hint of jealousy in her voice, she gives a fake smile. Pandora couldn't help but become jealous of her; being apart of her life...while Pandora missed so much of it...her heart heavy with pain from her family keeping them apart...but she let it go. Faye rolls her eyes already knowing where Pandora was coming from, "I mean don't ya think it's a tab bit narcissistic with the mirror thing?"

Faye laughs as she inhales from her vape, "Oh hell yeah, but that shit was hot." She smiles sitting up from the couch meeting Pandoras judgmental look. "Dude, you can't judge me...if you would've heard her begging...you'd think it was hot too."

"I rather go on with my life not thinking of that." Pandora raises her brows, "Emma seems to like me, she's cute. I dunno she has a really sassy personality and London seems to be the opposite."

"Yeah, I mean...Emma is her own person. I love her, you know?" Faye exhales before inhaling again.

"Don't you have therapy in a few minutes?" Pandora says making Faye gasp dropping her vape cursing under her breath grabbing whatever she needed in a hurry with Pandora laughing at her distress before blowing a kiss goodbye as she left.

~

Faye sits down in front of her therapist out of breath, "Sorry Sorry...so much traffic." She manages to say as her therapist who gave a smile. Faye points to Avery's new hairstyle; her light brown hair falling in thick waves up to her shoulders considering she normally wore a slick back bun. "I like it." Faye gives a small smile.

Avery had helped Faye since she left the hospital; helping her deal the real world, giving advice, trying to get Faye to understand the habits she had weren't healthy-even if Faye was being stubborn. She was thirty seven but how well kept she was along with good genes would make anyone think younger. "You cancelled last week, Faye...Wanna tell me why?" She fixes her glasses sitting up right.

"Oh...It was a bad day..." Faye lies knowing Avery saw right through it.

"Faye..." She begins leaning on her desk. "You know thats a lie."

"Okay, Okay...Just me and London have been working on our relationship and apart of me is stressing the fuck out." Faye sighs. "All she ever wants to do is talk and talk about random shit and I just..." Faye wanted to finish the sentence but she felt bad.

"Sex?"

"Yes...Yes!" Faye says. "I'm just so use to fucking when I feel any sort of emotion...London sees it but she doesn't to bring it up..."

"Faye...You have to realize your past sexual encounters are very much different from someone you're in a relationship with." Avery begins. "You have to break the barrier when it comes down to that."

"I love her. I absolutely adore that girl...but it comes down to the sex part...God...I...It's so hard to break it." Faye shakes her head. "She's always been big on taking it slow and speaking romantically but...I'm not that kind of girl."

"Faye, you keep putting in your mind that you can't do it...the more you make it reality."

"Okay, Okay..." Faye bites on her lip. "I just don't wanna fuck anything up...I'll go fucking crazy if I lose her." She says with Avery raising her brows. "Sorry I didn't mean it..."

Avery clears her throat, "How have the hallucinations been? You still seeing your mother?"

"Not...as often but she does occur time from time..."

"Why do you think she's still appearing Faye?" Avery ask with Faye looking confused. "I mean what inside you...has Haley still taunting you? Does it have any part with Harry?"

"I never had a childhood, Avery. I could never relate to these fucking kids playing Barbie or Monster High...I was raised with murders...rapist...I just still feel the guilt on the night she died...if I hadn't been so cold...She'd still be here." Faye raising her brows surprised she was even bringing it up. "I can't believe I said that...but I just can't help but have the guilt...She was always crying suicide and I would beg...then she'd laugh in my face...I...just thought she wouldn't do it."

"That's a lot on you, Faye...but you can't go and throw blame on yourself when it was toxic routine you thought had the same outcome like the last one." Avery shifts her glasses. "Faye, the more you let Haley and Harry 's life define you...You grow more anger and vile thinking a path of destruction is the best way to go about it, you are so blinded by all this...rage...you just can't accept an ounce of care."

Faye swallows hard, breaking contact wiping a single tear trying her best to not cry, still putting a brave face. The sessions with Avery weekly making Faye's mind more open to things she never thought of, "That night with Harry; it was so scary to see how quick I let him back in...He's a monster; he would never come back unless it was to hurt me...And I stood there hugging him...crying...his face soft with a remorse...acting out his feelings so well...and then I blank out." Faye looks at Avery with tears in her eyes. "When I saw the video of me on a rampage...my face so twisted...the violence...I can't even remember it still...But, I'm scared of myself, Avery...I'm the fear that keeps me up at night."

Avery sighs, standing up making her way towards Faye, wanting to comfort her. She sits right beside, Faye. "There's no denying that the anger you have is scary...but maybe a simple distraction could help; going out for a day, a trip...maybe even confession to a priest." Faye furrows her brows. "It helps with my other patients...they just go and confess and walk out going about their day."

Faye has a tear running down her cheek, she reaches to wipe it but Avery beats her. "Why are you so understanding?"

"Faye, you're so young to have such heartache dealing with intense trauma." Avery expressed. "I want you see the world isn't so bad...falling in love, growing happiness, gaining family...is all such a blessing."

Faye gives a small smile as Avery kisses her cheek, Faye's eyes wide with her cheeks turning pink. "I don't know if I liked that."

"It was an innocent peck, Faye." Avery smiles, setting her hand on Faye's thigh. "Your not hurting anyone."

~

Faye knocks on Pandoras door, nervously thinking back at her appointment wondering if it was best thing to even speak about it or keep it to herself. Pandora opens as Faye barges in a complete nervous wreck, "Pandora, is Emma here?"

"No..." Pandora says noticing at Faye being nervous. "You okay?"

"Avery kissed me."

"What?" Pandora's eyes go wide. "W-What do you mean she kissed you?"

"One moment we were discussing my trauma and the next she kissed my cheek." Faye explains with Pandora relaxing her shoulders at the sound of 'cheek'. "No! Pandora, you don't understand! I didn't like it...She kept caressing my thigh while giving me advice...I don't want to lose London."

"You won't lose London if nothing happened."

Faye shakes her head violently, "Dude! I'm in a relationship I can't have my therapist trying to fuck me!"

"Dude, it sounds like she was flirting while still being professional...Let it go." Pandora rolls her eyes. "It was a cheek kiss...and if It was nothing more than tell London."

"If I do that, London ends up life in prison." Faye raises her brows. "She's fucking crazy, why do you think I've been massaging her and giving all this lovey dovey shit?"

Pandora laughs, "Rose, I'm sure she isn't that crazy."

"She woke me up by yanking my hair because she had a dream of me cheating." Faye throws her arms in the air. "I had to bake a fucking cake for her after that in two in the fucking morning, okay? I literally kissed her ass all night and day because she kept saying 'I know what your doing'."

"Pero te gustan los locos." Pandora shrugs.