13th Doctor x Reader: Lost

Chapter 64: Admiring

A/n: Fluffy

You tell her everything (except the boring bits... and the emotional bits, really just the basics). Afterwards, she looks at the ground for a moment, then looks back at you with a much more serious expression.

"You know those weren't air vents, right?"

"I didn't think so." You sigh.

"They push gas into the hall. You were asleep for hours." Her voice is soft, and you realize what she's implying. They could've killed you, or you could be lying dead in a vent right now. No one would've ever known what happened to the two of you.

"I didn't know what else to do." You softly say, looking down.

"It doesn't matter." She shrugs, taking your hands. "You're here now." You nod, wrapping your arms around her neck and holding on.

"I'm worried about her." You confess. "Izzy. She had a knife in her pocket, that's how we pulled the screws out."

"You want to check on her?" 

"Mhm." You nod, taking her hand and walking down the hallway.

At the doorway she lets you go in first, following. The Doctor has finished, a splint running from her hip to leg, along with a wheelchair by the bed.

"She's okay?" You ask, staring at her sleeping figure with sadness.

"Might take a few days, but she'll be fine." The Doctor nods. Looking around, you realize Yaz and  Jenny have left. "Y/n." She lowers her voice. "I know you grew up in a difficult situation from what I saw, but... has she ever engaged in any kind of self harm?"

You shake your head, "not that I know of." The Doctor nods, looking over at her as well. "Why?"

"Saw a few scars, just wanted to make sure she's alright."

They could always be from some type of injury, but the knife in her pocket. No, she isn't that type of person. She always tried to put happiness in the world. Then again, you haven't recognized this new Izzy. Two years can do a lot to a person. You know what four years did to you.

"Okay, I'm going to... do find something to do." You shrug, leaving the room. A huge piece of you is just relieved she's safe now. The other pieces just want to cry. You still blame yourself, a little bit. You wish you could just take her problems away. But you can't, and you won't cry.

The familiar clicking of heels follow you down the hallway. You smile a little to yourself, just letting her follow you. Eventually, you come to your desired room. The music room. You have no idea how to play any of these instruments, well, a little piano from what your mom taught you as a little girl.

You sit down at it, playing a few notes. A presence sits down next to you, and you can feel her eyes on you.

"You don't know what you're doing, do you?" She asks. You don't know if she's referring to the piano or really life in general.

"Nope." You sigh, referring to both.

"Sit down, have a little chat. But don't give up." Missy wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you closer. "Come on, there's something I want to show you." She takes your hand, pulling you along the corridors. You constantly glance over your shoulder, worried someone would see you.

In the counsel room, she pulls a few levers, simply piloting the TARDIS.

"You were a bit tipsy," she pauses, a brief look of regret on her face, she must be referring to the disastrous coronation. "You asked me why there were two moons. Now you can see it happen for yourself." 

You follow her out of the TARDIS, into a field slightly wet with dew in the late night. She lies on her back, pulling you down next to her. The moon is slightly past the center of the sky, so you guess it's about one or two in the morning. Suddenly, a large rock pops into view, smashing into it. 

The entire night sky lights up with a little color, large rocks separating. A huge chunk blows off the back of the moon, slowly drifting off.

"Wow." You gasp, snuggling into her side. "What happens next?" You know this'll most likely take days to clear up. You vaguely remember the night sky from the ball, and it didn't look anything like this. Both moons looked exactly the same.

"Humans panicked, the tides went crazy, but it all settled down in the end." You hadn't thought of the tides, or any other effects of this, but of course, humans always find a way to adapt, make it through.

The two of you stay like that, laying in the grass, your head on her shoulder. Though you spend more time looking at her than the moons. Every angle of her face, the swirl of her hair on top of her head, how she smells like a spicy vanilla. You've wanted these moments for longer than you consciously knew. Just the thought of loosing this somehow makes your heart shatter inside.

"Gone somewhere poppet?" Missy asks, stroking the back of your neck.

"Just admiring you." You smile, placing a kiss on her shoulder.

"And?" She presses, a teasing tone to her voice.

You hum, playing along. "Stunning." You whisper.

She holds you a little tighter, not responding. A somewhat distant look crosses her face. You hold your head up with one arm, concerned.

"Now where'd you go?" You ask, tracing an invisible pattern on her arm sleeve.

"I feel the guilt everyday for what I did. Don't know how you forgave me so easily." She whispers, eyes becoming a little glassy.

"You're a better person today." You argue.

She sits up, shaking her head. "I burned entire cities just to see the pretty patterns the smoke made in the sky, and that's only the beginning."

"You told me not to give up, so don't give up on yourself." You argue, looking into her eyes.

"I don't want to hurt you."

You weakly smile at that. Everyone tries to dance around that topic, like they're stepping on broken glass. No words seem right to respond to that, so you settle with kissing her cheek.

"I know you wouldn't." You squeeze her hand.

Instead of saying anything else, she captures you in an intense kiss, channeling an overwhelming amount of emotions. You do the same, trying to show her how much you admire her.

At that moment, a loud bang echoes throughout the sky. You're the first to pull away, taking in deep breaths of warm air.

"Back to the TARDIS?" She asks, her voice innocent, but her eyes ask with a suggestive look.

You nod, jumping up from the grass. Taking one last look at the exploding sky, you smile. The Universe really can be an amazing place.