after all this time?

i'm afraid this is all a dream

Camila's POV

I decided to stop the car by the beach road so we could talk properly. Lauren waited patiently.

- First, I must say I do not want to fight with you - I started -, I just want to express how I'm feeling

- Yeah alright

Lauren was clearly impatient, but that was just making me more nervous.

- When I left Miami to go on tour Lucy was a complete stranger, just someone from your past that you didn't talk for years, and then I come back and she's in your birthday giving you old pictures and even a freaking song??? I mean, how did things escalate so fast?

Every word that came out of my mouth made me see similarities with how Lauren and I reconnected and that was making me feel sick. We started the exact same way and look where we are now.

- I don't know, Camila. She was there, alright? And I don't have many friends in Miami anymore, my best friend wasn't on my birthday party if you didn't notice

She was talking about Alexa. I completely forgot about that. Lauren kept on talking.

- And suddenly I'm too old to go out with my sister, so yeah I was bored and that was why I said yes to that ice cream

- It didn't stop there, clearly

- No, it didn't. My mom invited her in a couple more times and I let myself get closer to her again, you're right

I'm right. It's happening exactly how it happened with me, with the exception that Clara absolutely loves Lucy, she always did. Great. Amazing.

I didn't say anything and to be honest I couldn't even look at Lauren at that point. I was just staring the road.

- And now I'm sure Lucy and I absolutely have no possibility to ever come back together

I looked at her eyes. She was saying the truth.

- And you know why? Because all I could ever think was you and how much I missed you. Because I broke up with Lucy eight years ago cause I was in love with you, you idiot, and I still am and there wasn't one fucking day of regret since then

Lauren's POV

After I said it all Camila just stared at me saying nothing. I think she wasn't expecting it.

- Lauren... I didn't mean to...

- Yeah but you did

I could say she was holding her tears and so was I. That's so messed up. I looked down to Lucy's gift, all these moments on those pics mean nothing to me anymore.

One picture, though, was taken on a very specific day. I showed it to Camila.

- See that one?

It was Lucy and I inside the 5H bus, I was so drunk that day. I remember like it was yesterday.

- I was feeling like shit because I saw you kissing someone else

Camila was surprised.

- Who?

- I don't know, some guy. It was terrifying because I was realizing I had feelings for you, and Lucy was there and you were kissing a boy. So I had to pretend nothing happened, but of course I couldn't so I drank my ass off and got late to an interview the next morning

- I remember that interview, our manager almost killed you for that. I can't believe I didn't notice I was the reason

- The point is... - I said - it's always been you, Camila. It's always your fucking eyes, it's always your beautiful mouth, it's always...

I stopped. I was supposed to be mad at her. I think I drank too much at the party because all I can focus are her pink lips...

- I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Lauren. I'm so embarrassed, I'm sorry for being so insecure and for messing everything up like this

- Shut up

Before she could answer I jumped to her lap, kissing her mouth like it was the last thing I'd do. The small space on that car wasn't a problem.

- Lauren...

I pulled her hair hard so I could get on her neck, I was focused on leaving some marks.

- Lauren...

Camila called me again and I ignored her, so she finally gave up. Outside it was raining a little bit but inside it was hot as hell.

When I was opening my dress' zipper we heard a noise.

- SHIT

A fucking cop stopped behind the car. I jumped out of Camila's lap back to my seat, closing my dress as fast as I opened it and pretending we weren't doing anything. Camila patiently opened her window, breathing slow so it wouldn't look like we were about to have sex.

- Good night - the cop said.

- Good night, officer

- Everything okay? Please let me see your ID

He looked at me for a few seconds, then back to Camila.

- Yeah, everything fine - she handed him her ID.

- It's a little late for you ladies to be here, isn't it?

I don't know if it was the drinks or the fact that I was nervous but I wanted to laugh so bad.

- Yes, we just stopped so I could call someone - Camila said extremely serious, I was totally buying it - but we are leaving, if that's okay

The cop just stared, trying to understand what the fuck is going on.

- Alright. Be safe, ladies

- Thank you!

He gave back Camila's ID and we left. When we couldn't see him anymore we burst into laugh.

- Oh my God I can't believe we didn't get caught - Camila said.

- Thank God you're an actress

- I could see the TMZ report in front of me

- Camila Cabello and Lauren Jauregui arrested for having sex on the car... yeah that could be a great story

...

I was so tired when I opened our apartment's door that I just wanted to run to our bed, but Camila stopped me.

- Lo...

She came closer and then stopped, still a little insecure about what happened. I put her hands around me, making her stay close to me.

- I know you're sorry - I said - and so am I. I knew you were feeling insecure and should've said all that before. I don't ever want to make you feel like you're not the love of my life, cause you are

She opened a smile and hugged me, resting her face on my neck.

- Sometimes I'm afraid this is all a dream and I do stupid things because I don't want to wake up

I made Camila look at me.

- This is real. I'm here, you are everything to me. Everything