The stories in my flesh (Sequel to scars)

Part 38

Anthony is by the door waiting for me as my shift ends. Nick walks beside me and he sees Anthony there, he huffs and walks away from me. "I'll see you later then." Nick says.

Anthony walks to me and opens his arms for a big hug, I hug him back smelling his shirt. He smells good, like soap. Maybe he just took a shower. I can feel his muscles through his shirt as his grip gets tighter and I've never realized he was this strong. "Sorry." He says pulling away smiling sheepishly. "It's okay." I say with a smile. "I didn't tell you I was picking you up well because I don't have your number. Do you have a phone of something I can contact you on?" He asks as he puts his arm around me.

"No. Maybe I can get one when I get paid next time." He nods and opens his car door for me.

"How was work today?" He asks as he begins to drive. "Terrible." I say thinking of Brittney and the tripping and Macy. "Why's that?" He asks concentrated on the road. "Britney showed up-" his eyes immediately move away from the road and to me. "What? Did she hurt you? What did she do?" He keeps glancing at the road and then to me back and forth.

"You know how Brittney is. She's so- she's so Brittney. I tripped and spilled coffee all over her." Anthony grins, "I hope it was hot." I can't help but to smile, "I'm sure it was."

He chuckles. "But then I got in trouble with my manager." I say and he stops chucking, "Oh no. What did he say?" I sigh, "He kinda screamed at me and told me to be careful and that if I ever did something stupid like that I would get fired." He frowns, "It's not like you meant to trip. He's a douche." I nod in agreement. "But Sydney, are you okay?"

"Oh, yeah I'm fine. Getting screamed at wasn't fun but-" he interrupts me. "No Sydney, no. I didn't mean that. I'm asking are you for real okay," he glances in my direction. "Were you okay seeing Brittney?" I hold my breath for a few seconds until I can't hold it any longer. He stops at a red light and stares at me. "I don't think I'll ever be okay with seeing her." I say in a whisper.

"I just wish you hadn't met her. Your life would be so different." The red light changes and he starts to drive again. "My life would be different." He nods as he sighs. "But I wouldn't like that life." I say, he raises an eyebrow. "Why wouldn't you? You wouldn't have those nasty memories of her and of what she did to you. Maybe just maybe you wouldn't be so scarred deep inside of it wasn't for all those things they did to you."

"I'm not just scarred inside." I say but I suddenly regret saying it when I see Anthony's face. His face changes to sadness and I regret mentioning my scars because I know I hurt him.

He parks outside his apartment building. As he opens the door for me he stops in front of me. "You haven't cut since you left the hospital have you?" He asks. I shake my head no, I get tempted every once in a while. I'm not going to lie almost everyday. But I won't do it. For Anthony and for Nick. I get out of the car and he hugs me again. "I don't want you to be hurt anymore." He says.

I look into his eyes, "I'm not hurting when I'm with you." He kisses my forehead and we walk to his apartment. "You know why I'm kind of thankful Brittney talked to me that one day I was all alone?"

He opens his door and we go in, "Why?" He asks. "Because of that I went to the party and I met you. I probably didn't met you in good circumstances." I blush thinking of how we actually met. "And because of that one night at the party we got to know each other later on. And then I fell deeply in love with you." He says, my heart beats harder as he says he word love. "You showed me the meaning of happiness." I say with a smile.

We walks to the kitchen and I help him prepare a recipe he learned in his class today. "Did you hate me after you know- the party? And what happened?" He says as he fills up a container with flour, I crack three eggs and put the egg yolk in the flour like he told me to. "No, I didn't hate you."

"Then why did you try to push me away?" He says adding water to the egg yolk and flour. "I was ashamed and embarrassed," I take out the mixer from the kitchen cabinet. "I felt like you were disgusted by me." I say, he plugs in the mixer and looks at me. "Why did you think that?"

"I mean I had never- well, you know.." I feel my whole body get hot. "And then I ended up drunk and having sex with you. Of course you were drunk too and you didn't know what you were doing. Why would I think you were disgusted? Nobody had ever shown interest in me, and then you started showing interest. I thought you were just planning your revenge on me, because I never thought a guy like you could love a girl like me."

"I didn't think a girl like you would love a boy like me." He says starting to mix the flour and egg yolks. I stand there feeling pretty surprised. Why wouldn't any girl fall for him? He's handsome, gentle, caring, amazing and super supportive. He stops mixing and I look at him, "Why?"

"Because, Sydney you're different. I know you think you're just an ordinary girl but you're not. I know you still have insecurities that drown you and tear you up inside, but that's all up here," he touches my temple. "I wish you could see yourself the you really are. Absolutely beautiful. You're human and I know you make mistakes but in my eyes you're perfect the way you are."

"This is why I love you. You have a beautiful mind and you were the first one to see the best in me, you never gave up on me." He smiles, "I'll never give up on you." He pokes my nose joke fully.

"Can I just ask one more question?" He says pouring the mixture in another container. "Yes. Go ahead."

"Why did you think I couldn't love a 'girl like you'? What do you mean a "girl like you"?

"Who would love a girl with scars?" I say staring at my ugly wrists. He holds my hands and kisses my both of my wrist. "I do."