It's time for breakfast, I sit on the same table I've been sitting on. Today my hair is down because the scratches show of my hair is up, and of course I have a long sleeve shirt on. As soon as Amy sits beside she gives me a look, "Soooooooooo, Nick and you-" "Amy. No." I cut her off before she finishes. "But he let you borrow his jacket!" She says excited. "Umm yeah cause something happened." I say. "What? Huh?" She says raising her eyebrow. "Stuff." I say looking down at my breakfast. "Aha yeah, sure sure. Are you sure you two-"
"No!! Now shush cause he's coming." Nick sits down in front of Carrie who's attempting to eat her breakfast. "Hello Nick." Amy says with a grin, Nick looks at her but doesn't answer. "Psh, you could be nicer you know." She says taking a bite off her piece of bread. Nick still doesn't answer. "Aren't you gonna talk? Not even to your girlfriend?" I almost choke swallowing orange juice, Nick looks up. "She's not my girlfriend." I can feel my cheeks get hot with embarassment. "Amy!" I whisper harshly. She gives me an 'I don't know what you're talking about look'.
"Then why did you let her borrow your jacket?" I look down at my lap, Is he going to say it outloud? Tell it in front of everybody? After a couple minutes I look up, Nick is looking at me. "I can't tell you why, only she can." Amy turns to face me. "So why? You don't have to tell me or anything- it's fine if you don't." this time she's whispering, nobody else is paying attention except Nick. I look around making sure there's no nurses around, I pull up my dress a little so she can see the cuts.
Amy gasps, "You did that to yourself?" I nod pulling my dress back down, "Why? How?" Should I tell her? I mean I already showed her the cuts so might as tell her why and how. "I- stole a paper clip from doctor Smith, and I did it because I hate feeling nothing. The stupid pills they give me make me feel numb and weird and I can't stand it." Amy is watching me carefully like she's thinking, Nick is eating but I can tell he's listening.
"Oh Sydney!" she says loudly, the kids at the table turn to look at us, "Amy! Hushh!" I say trying to act casual, they go back to eating and she speaks, "S-sorry. But why would you do that? Is that the reason why you're here?" she asks, I nod and poke my breakfast with a fork. "How did you start- umm, that?" I sigh, suddenly I get tons of flashbacks. I think of Brittney, of her friends, of people humiliating me, of the disaster prom was. "Its a long story."
"We have time." she says, I shake my head no, "I don't want to talk about it." I can feel my chin quiver. "Oh okay, I'm sorry- didn't mean to make you remember your past." she says. "Its fine." I manage to keep myself together. "Can I ask one more question?" I nod, "Do you wear long sleeve shirts cause-"
"I wear them because I have bandages, if I don't cover them up people would start to ask me to show them what happened to me." her mouth forms an 'o' and I can tell she wants to see so bad. "Don't do it anymore Sydney, okay? It's too risky, if they catch you they'll tell your parents and you'd have to stay here longer." my heart beats fast, "Wait- how long have you been here?" she puts her curly/straight hair behind her ear. "Two months." two months? I haven't even been here a week and I already feel like its an eternity! "How long have you been here?" I ask Nick, "One month." he says.
"So- we have to stay here for months?" I choke out. "The time here is from five to six months, however your parents can take you out or leave you here as long as they want to. You could get out earlier if you behave and act good." This is too much. "But I'll be eighteen in a couple days. Can I get out then?" I ask, Amy hums. "No don't think so. Since you have depression and you have cuts, your parents can use that agaisnt you and say you are not capable to take care of yourself." I scratch my neck nervously, five or six months? Here? No, no, I need to get out as soon as I turn eighteen. So I can go back to California and look for Anthony. My Anthony.
"Hey Sydney stop scratching your neck so much, its turning red." Amy says, I stop doing it. If only you'd see the back of my neck.
YOU ARE READING
The stories in my flesh (Sequel to scars)
Roman pour AdolescentsI look around the circle it's my turn to talk, I look down at my lap. " I knew a girl who liked to draw. She drew pictures that nobody saw, she was more artistic during the night. In the cold shower out of any sights. She kept a secret no one knew...
