The stories in my flesh (Sequel to scars)

Part 41

I walk beside Nick as we leave the cafe. "Aren't you gonna see your boyfriend today?" He asks, "Later, maybe." I whisper. "Ahh." He says walking ahead, "Wait for me." I say he doesn't wait though, he keeps going until he reaches the taxi.

~

As soon as I hear a knock on the door I quickly run to it. Nick is in his room so I'm sure he didn't hear. "Anthony." I say giving him a hug, he kisses my head and hugs me back. "I'm glad you opened the door and not your friend." He says. "I have to tell him I'm leaving." I say, Anthony doesn't say anything but his face expression tells me everything.

I walk to Nicks room and knock on the door lightly. I don't hear anything so I slowly open the door, I see Nick quickly close a notebook and put it under his pillow. "So- sorry I knocked but you didn't answer and I .. Well." He stares at me and scratches his head, "It's fine. What do you want?"

"I was just telling you that I'm going out with Anthony tonight." Nick nods his head, "Yeah I knew. But you didn't have to tell me."

"Well I just thought you'd want to know-" he interrupts me, "Well I don't." I bite the inside of my cheek, "Okay." Then I close the door.

"Are you okay?" Anthony asks as he starts to drive off. No, not really. What's going on with Nick? I don't know! And that bothers me so much. "Yeah." I say laying my head back on the seat. "You don't look okay." He says, one of his hands grabs mine and he slowly squeezes it lightly. "I'm just tired. I couldn't sleep much last night."

"And why?" Because of the nightmare. But of course I don't mention that. "I don't know, I guess it's because .. Well I don't know."

"You seem like you're in another world." He says glancing at me, I can barely see his eyes because it's dark outside. "Maybe I am." I say closing my eyes.

When I wake up I start to freak out. I fell asleep in his car! What if I snored?
Or worse what if I talked in my sleep? "Woah, woah. It's okay love, it's okay." Anthony says. I rub my eyes, "I didn't mean to fall asleep." I whisper, he chuckles in the dark. "It's fine really. Now let's go have dinner."

I then look where we are parked. It's not his apartment building, it's some fancy restaurant. Oh God. "We're going to eat here?" I ask as he gets off the car. He opens my door, "Of course we are silly." He pokes cheek playfully, "Why can't we just go to your apartment?" I ask looking at the restaurant. "Because I want to take you out to a pretty restaurant."

I really don't want to be here, he must've seen my face expression because he looks kind of hurt and disappointed so I suck it up and fake a smile. "That's so thoughtful of you dear." I say getting up. He smiles happily and it has to be the most adorable smile in the whole wide world. He holds my hand as we walk in and I hold my breath when he walks to pay.

It looks so fancy, there's a huge chandelier in the center. The girls are dressed in beautiful clothes and the guys look so educated and they're well dressed as well. Anthony finishes paying and he holds my hand smiling, he looks wonderful. He has nice clothes and everything. As we walk to look for a table people look at us and I look down feeling my cheeks heat up.

The reason I didn't want to be in here is because of this. I'm not dressed appropriate, I have simple jeans and a tshirt. My hair is down but it's neither straight or curly. And I feel so embarrassed about my appearance, I didn't want to embarrass Anthony but it's too late now. The people are staring at me and I know what they're thinking, "Why is this handsome guy with her?"

We sit on a table and I stare at my hands. "Sydney?" I look up and see Anthony looking at me. "Sorry." I say, he gives me a questioning look. "What? About what?" I clear my throat touching my cheeks with my hands because they're cold and it might make the redness and hotness of my cheeks go away.

"I- I didn't know we were coming here to eat, I could've worn something better .. I'm sorry, I just look like an oddball here." He reachers over and grabs my hand. "Sydney, don't say that. I think you look flawless just the way you are. You don't need any fancy clothes or makeup. You're naturally beautiful."

"You're amazing, I swear." I say clenching his hand a little. The restaurant is filled with beautiful girls with flawless skin and stunning bodies yet Anthony doesn't even glance at them. He looks at me, at little me. I still wonder how in the world can he love me?

~

The apartment door is locked, I stand on the dark hallway knocking on the door. Why won't Nick open the door? I hit he door hard that it makes my hand burn. Finally I hear footsteps coming to the door.

Nick opens the door and I hold my breath for a few seconds when I see he's not wearing a shirt. He rubs his eyes, "It's like eleven o'clock. I'm trying to sleep." He sounds grumpy and I finally breath. "It's your fault for locking the door." I say walking in, he turns on the living room light. "My fault? Oh really? You shouldn't be coming this late first of all." One of his shirts is on the couch. He grabs it and puts it on good thing because I felt a little awkward talking to Nick shirtless.

"What? So now you're telling me what to do?" He rolls his eyes, "I'm just saying get here before eleven because I'm not going to sit around and wait for you to come back from hanging out with your little- whatever his name is."

"His name is Anthony." I say starting to get annoyed. "Tell him to bring you earlier." He turns around and starts to walk to his room. "Nick," I say trying to get him to turn around, he keeps walking. "Nick," I say again he completely ignores me and I walk to him. "Nick!" He turns around when he hears my voice rising.

"What? What do you want? I'm trying to go to sleep dammit!" He starting to get angry and I know I should keep my mouth shut because I know how angry Nick can get. "What is wrong with you!? Why do you keep acting like this with me?"

"I'm acting like I've always acted. I haven't changed a thing." He says "Yes you have. I try to talk to you but you keep pushing me away! And I'm tired of it." He runs his fingers through his hair, "Don't you think I get tired of you leaving me behind? I'm just doing what you're doing. You always leave to go with him, and it makes me feel alone. I stay here alone every night while you're having so much fun with him."

"Nick I-" he interrupts me, "Just stop. Okay? I don't want to talk right now, my head hurts." He's about to open the door but I pull his arm away. "Listen to me!" I don't realize I'm screaming.

"I don't want to listen! Leave me alone!" He screams loud and I flinch. He's never screamed at me and he looks beyond pissed. I feel my heart go to my stomach because I'm both scared and hurt. "Just go!" He screams again. I start to cry because I'm that weak I can't hold it in. "Please, I don't want to say anything stupid or hurt you in any way." I can see he's trying to calm down and I know he has anger problems. I nod my hand silently and walk to my room.

I wipe my tears and lay on my bed staring at the ceiling. I'm breathing fast and it feels like there's not enough air in the room.