(Jen's POV)
"So, tell me again how this Facebook fight started?" I snickered as I scrolled through Mason's feed, attempting to find the argument.
"Well, I was scrolling through the Of Mice and Men tag, someone said some things about you that weren't true in the slightest. I rushed to your defense and said...stuff." He continued to play with my hair as he shifted uncomfortably next to me.
"Oh my God." I giggled as I found the argument. My heart tumbled a bit as I saw the comment that started it all.
Brandon McDevitt: "Jen Carlile definitely looks like she came from a drug addict."
Mason's reply soon lifted my spirits.
Mason Bohn: "Hey, man, Jen happens to be the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my entire life. She is the light of my world and the love of my life. So go fuck a bucket of dog shit."
Brandon McDevitt: "How much do you have to pay to fuck her? Or does she have to pay you?"
Mason Bohn: "We don't fuck. If we did, no amount of money could ever buy the priceless gift of her presence."
Brandon McDevitt: "Not even good enough for money? Shame."
As soon as I saw the next comment, I began crying from laughing so hard.
Mason Bohn: "I hope four hippos come to your house and force you to blow them simultaneously and you choke on hippo cum and die."
Brandon McDevitt: "Jen probably has a bigger dick than you. This ceased to be an argument 5 minutes ago. I just wanted to see a little boy get worked up over his tiny pecker."
Mason Bohn: "Well, every pecker must seem tiny after all the huge hippo cocks you've had in your mouth. Go suck more of them."
My sides hurt from laughing so hard. "Baby, why are hippo dicks the first things you jump to in an argument?" I struggled to choke out while laughing.
"Oh hush, you have your quirks too." He said while I kissed his cheek.
Austin waltzed through the door, holding a bag from Panera. "I brought you some soup. Well, I use the word "soup" loosely. Doctor says you can't chew anything right now, so it's just the broth. I ate the chicken and vegetable shit out of it for you."
I took the bag from him. "Thank you, Daddy."
Austin leaned down and kissed my forehead. "You're welcome, darlin'."
He sat down on the edge of the hospital bed and pulled out his own food from the bag. "Feeling any better, babe?"I shrugged my shoulders, sipping water from a plastic cup. "It still hurts, but that's normal. All bleeding has stopped. And I'm with the people I love the most. So, not too bad."
"According to Doctor Friendly, you can leave here in about two days. He says your recovery is remarkable. Then we'll go see about getting all that shit off your teeth."
I sighed with relief. My birthday was in 5 days and I was afraid I'd have to spend it in my shitty little hospital room.
Mason leaned over and put his nose to the side of my face, nuzzling my hair. All the while, Austin stared him down, trying to look intimidating while eating a muffin.
I rolled my eyes and put Mason's arm around my shoulders. "I thought you said that he passed your test."
Austin shook his head. "He passed Aaron's and Aaron's only. That guy doesn't know a criminal when he sees one."
I rested my forehead on my hand. "The only thing he's guilty of is being secretly sexually attracted to hippos."
Austin choked on his drink and Mason shot straight up. "Since when am I attracted to hippos?"
I tossed my hair to the side. "Ever since I saw your little Facebook battle."
"Okay, that was a one time thing, and that doesn't mean I have an infatuation with any animals or anything of that-" I pressed my lips to his, knowing it would be the only thing that would shut him up.
Austin cleared his throat. "I'm right here."
"I know." I said in-between kisses.
Again, another short little filler chapter. I have something bigger coming as well, so don't get too mad at me just yet.
The argument about hippo dicks was inspired by an Aziz Ansari joke called "Online Fights". Aziz is one of my favorite comedians and I definitely recommend his stuff to you guys.
Chapter song: All About Us by He is We.
Love you!
-Gracie
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You're Not Alone
Fanfiction14 year old Jen DeMattos has managed to run away from her drug addicted, abusive mother. She meets Austin Carlile, front man of the famous band Of Mice and Men, who makes plans to adopt Jen as his own. From the jump, the two seem as though they've k...