Faceless Instincts

Epilogue

"Papa," tiny Sussanne ran towards her father as I handed her the paper boat she had just learnt to make.

The sun was setting and the evening air was crisp yet soothing on the skin. I made my way through the backyard following her and Dorian came into view, walking towards the  table reading a book and sipping on wine. His face lit up as he saw  Sussanne and immediately kept down his wine and book, "Come here," he said and she ran into his arms, "what's this?" He asked and she showed him her boat.

"I made it." She cackled in her baby tongue and Dorian tickled her in stomach, making her laugh.

"Can you make one for me too?" He asked and she nodded. I sat the table and looked at him, "how are you feeling today?" He asked, settling down with Sussanne in his lap and I shrugged.

"It's... Heavy." I said and he gave me a small smile, "I just... It's hard to believe that it's already been seven years..." I trailed off and he took my hand, Sussanne still in his arms.

"I am sorry for.." He was cut short by another sound that came from inside the house. The Ashford residence rumbled and Dorian and I knew what it was. We didn't even bother to stand up, we just sat there and waited.

Soon Tanner and Nikolai came running out of the house, guilty looks on their faces but pure joy in their eyes.

"What did you do now?" I asked and Nikolai grinned like a boy.

"Papa," Sussanne jumped out of Dorian's lap and ran towards Nikolai, "look." She waved her boat at him and he took her tiny frame into his arms, and sent her flying in the air before grabbing her again and planted a big kiss on her cheek, "I made this." She gave him her boat and Nikolai studied it with precision.

"Never have I ever seen a boat this perfect." He praised and Sussanne pointed towards me, "mama taught me."

Nikolai walked towards me and planted a soft kiss on my lips, "never have I ever seen a woman like your mama either." He said and Tanner made face.

"Eww... Dad." He said and sat beside me.

I snuggled him in my arms and gave a peck on his cheek which he immediately rubbed off, "eek.. mom."

"Trust me, buddy, I had to see a lot of that when you weren't around," Dorian said and Tanner freed himself from me and ran up to Dorian.

"That's why we are best friends." Tanner squealed and Dorian laughed, ruffling Tanner's hair.

A smile spread across my face as I saw everyone happy, I didn't want anything in my life more than this. However, I knew I also had to face the ultimate reality in a few moments.

"You ready?" Nikolai asked and I looked at him and then Dorian who nodded.

"Yeah," I said and went inside to pick up the flowers that I had arranged from the kitchen counter and made my way towards the car.

"Where are we going?" Sussanne asked Dorian who clutched her in his arms as Nikolai drove.

"We are going to visit one of your mama's best friend."

"Uncle Tanner?" Tanner asked and Dorian nodded with a sad smile.

Soon, we all stood in front of the iron gate. My heart felt heavy as my eyes stung with tears while we made our way through the rows. Memories came flooding down and I took a deep breath.

In the corner of my heart, I still wished and hoped that it wasn't true, that somehow I could go back and change it, but I also knew that it wasn't possible.

Seven years had passed since that night. That night didn't just end an eclipse but it also took my best friend away.

I read the tombstone and no matter how many times I did that, it was never enough for me to realise the truth in it.