My Way Home Is Through You (Frerard)

Chapter 9

Letting my eyes slowly flutter open, I found myself lying on Gerard's chest, my hair messy over his shirt and my hand flat on his stomach and his arms wrapped around me, just as I had fallen asleep early this morning. I smiled when I heard him talking, for a moment I though he was talking to himself, it was very random, but then I heard Kyle's giggling fill the room and I smiled somewhat wider. Looking up, I saw Kyle st right up against Gerard's side so he didn't fall off the bed, Gerard lying right in the centre of the bed looking at Kyle. When he caught a glimpse of me moving, he looked down, tightening his arms around me and smiling, I could help but smile back. Kyle smiled too when I looked at him, leaning up, I kissed Gerard softly before slipping out of the bed.

"I'm going to make coffee." I smiled fluffing Kyles hair up on my way out.

"Yes please." Gerard grinned widely, I simply laughed rolling my eyes and heading out of the door.

Today I had one aim, one aim only. I was determined to follow my plan through, I have had enough of broken promises, unfinished tasks, questions left unanswered, I had enough of that with homework, I wanted a nice day. A nice day I would have, I would be sure of it. It was safe to say that dream had shaken me, and shaken me hard at that, in fact a better phrase would be it scared the living shit out of me. An insane asylum, was the worst thing I could dream of, I would rather be on death row, if I ended up there I would never cope. I'm pretty sure that wasn't what scared me most about the dream however, I think it was Gerard, Gerard scared the shit out of me.

What scared me about it, wasn't the place - although that would too - but the fact that Gerard sent me, Gerard signed me up, Gerard left me there. He was trying to help, I understood that, I got that, but I felt so betrayed, there were other ways, better ways. Even in my dream I wasn't crazy, the people there, oh they would have been, what would I have done.

Actually that's wrong, the scariest part, was how real it felt, because I swear to God, that was the most realistic dream I have ever had. When he turned away from me I thought my heart was going to deflate, I thought my whole body was, usually in a nightmare you don't feel it, but holy shit I did. Every word he spoke, every expression he wore on his face, every movement he made, they were all so exact so precise, exactly what he does for real and I was shitting bricks. Even Kyle, everything he did was so...him, it was all exactly how I would expect him to react, to behave, I was fucking ducks.

I knew it was a dream, I knew it was fine, I would never need to go anywhere like that and in the rare possibility that I did, I knew Gerard wouldn't send me, not if I didn't want to. Getting worked up about a dream was silly really, it wasn't real and it would never happen, hence my determination to have a perfect day. Kyle could do whatever he wanted, Gerard could do whatever he wanted too, within reason, but aslong as they were content then I had reason to be.

Just as I had finished making the coffees, the phone began to ring, surprising my momentarily. Checking my cell phone, I wondered who would be ringing the home phone at half past nine on a saturday. Flipping it off, I left the coffees going to answer the phone, before the answer machine picked up. I always hated getting the answer machine, I had no reason, I just didn't like it very much so always made sure to pick up the phone when I could.

"Hello?" I said smiling at Kyle who came bolting down the stairs.

"I'm Alex." What sounded like a little girl, said in reply, she sounded like one of those people who was happy and amusing and stuck their hand out for you to shake when you became acquainted.

"Maybe you have the wrong number sweetie." I chuckled running a hand through my hair and trying to ignore Kyle tugging on my trousers and talking to me.

"No, Kyle said this was his number." She said sounding a little confused, I turned to Kyle listening to him asking me 'Is it Alex?' Maybe she did have the right number. "Yeah, Kyle said this was it and that his Daddy might pick up, he said Frank, b-but then he said Gee an- I'm confused." She sighed.