The Luna Legacy - Genesis

CHAPTER 65 - I CAN'T STAY

I Showered and I packed my bag, then I went to the kids' room, and I tell them that we were going back to our old house. Abby saw the state that I was in and immediately got concerned.

"Who did this to you?" she says, and I shook my head telling her it was an accident.

"So why are you leaving, are you breaking up with Noah? Did he do this to you Taylor" and she looks fearful.

"Abby, Noah, would never hurt me, at least not physically. I just need some space from Noah right now that's all, I just can't be in this house when he gets home" I say to her. She doesn't ask any more questions she goes and pack her bag and then helped me to pack Tom's.

As we are driving out the gate, I see Noah pull up and block my car from leaving. He gets out and walk toward my car. I still have my windows up and he knocks on the glass "Taylor open the door".

I roll the window down and say, "Noah please I can't do this, not right now, please I need to go" and my voice begins to crack.

"So, you're leaving, no trying to talk you're just going to leave?" he says visibly hurt.

He puts his hand inside the car and open the lock then open the locked door and gently takes me out and I do not protest. He hugs me tight as he says "baby, please don't leave, please give a chance to make this right".

His sweet embrace, his intoxicating smell it is pulling me in, but I know that I can't let him get away this easy. I pull away from him and he looks me over and says with pure rage and he doesn't try to hide it not "Charlotte did this to you?' he stares at my scars, the vein in his forehead bulging. I have never seen him angrier.

"What's done is done, Noah, yes your ex attacked me. This is the kind of danger that I am in being with you. Just let me go" I say to him my anger is evident. He looks up at me with hurt and angry eyes the.

"Taylor, plea..."

"if I stay, we are not working anything out. So just let me leave, I have the kids and I just can't stay in this house with you tonight, so I am leaving. There is no point trying to talk to you I can't even look at you right now" I say and turn my head away from him.

"Ok, then I will leave, please don't leave Taylor. Please stay here with the kids, I will do whatever you want me to do just please stay" he says, the emotion in his voice potent and raw. Why after every fucking thing he has done I am the one feeling like I am betraying him by leaving. Why do I feel bad for wanting to leave?

I have always been a rational person and I promised myself that I would never be the girl who ignore red flags in relationships not like my sister. Not like Natalia!

I get back in the car and I say "Noah, please move, I am leaving" and roll my windows ups as my tears run down my face.

He signals to his driver to clear the road and I drive off into the night. Its times like this that I wish I had my mother or my big sister even. I wish I had someone to talk to, someone who can make this feeling go away.

The pain in my heart is unbearable, I don't know if I can handle this, all I want to do is turn this car around and drive back to him. Is this why Natalia never left Giorgio, because of how much it hurts?

Abby rubs my back then she says "It's ok Taylor, I'm sorry about everything. I am sorry I gave you such a hard time about everything"

We got home and I push the key inside the slot opening the door and walk inside. It has been months since we have been inside this house, everything seems so small, strange and unfamiliar. The walls seem to me moving in on me, they feel close, suffocating me.

I am unable to breathe, being here between these empty walls remind me of what isn't. Being here solidifies my decision but my heart has not accepted it, I can feel how it restricts inside my chest.

I go straight to my room close the door behind me and sit on the floor with my back against the door. Soon after a knock on my bedroom door jolts me from my self-depreciation thoughts. My heart leaps as the thought of Noah coming back to apologize again. If it's him, I will forgive him. My heart cannot handle this emptiness. My heart leaps as I open the door expecting to see one person but when have I ever been that lucky in matters of the heart?

The kids walk inside, and Abby says "can we sleep in here tonight? Please". They both look up at me with puppy dog faces and I couldn't say no. I know this was Abby's idea, she knows that I am not as strong as I want to be, Noah makes me weak.

All three of us cuddle up together in my bed. I waited until they were sleeping, then retreats to the bathroom and curled myself on the floor. I couldn't stop the pain coming from deep in the pit of my stomach I hold my belly and cry. I have never felt pain like this before, I want it to stop, I don't want to feel like this.