Today is aunt Josephine's gather up. At least I was told it was a gather up, but seeing aunt Josephine's maids putting up the decoration makes it seem more like a festive ball. There is a big table with all kinds of foods to take the hunger away and fill the already fed.
A few guests have arrived. A few I don't know and some I do. For example... Rachel Lynde. She is quite the gossip mouth arround Green Gables. She doesn't leave a single detail out of a conversation when talking about someone else's business. Worst of all, she creates rumors. Rumors that she may think are true but are long from being even a part of this world.
Ruby and her parents were there as well as Billy and Moody. They were talking in a corner.
Diana and I are peeking from the little slit between the frame and the door, looking at all the guests. I am still not dressed for the event, but Diana has a very beautiful yellow puff sleeved dress on.
"That's enough peeking." Diana tells me, almost shutting my face in between the door. "We need to get ready if we want to attend the gather up."
"That is no gather up. 'Tis a whole party." I tell her. She laughes and sits me down in front of the vanity. She grabbes a blue ribbon. Tying it beautifully in my hair.
"Where's the dress?"
"On the bed."
"Go put it on." She tells me.
***
I look at myself in the reflection of the window. That doesn't look like me. My cheeks have been lightly painted with a pink paint and my lips look more red. My ribbon matches my dress and I feel the corset around my waist dig into my ribs, making me look thinner.
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"You look dashing!" Diana brings up.
"Thank you. You do too. Yellow suits you very well." I tell her. Diana is a very beautiful young woman. And she deserves to know that.
Together we walk down the stairs to the main area. It feels like a moment you would only read in a book. The moment seems slow and it's even slower descending the stairs when I have on shoes that make me look taller.
"Look who's here." I whisper in her ear. My eyes go to the boy named Jerry.
"Oh my, I had no idea Jerry would be here. Maybe I should go back up and change into-"
"You're fine. You look dashing!" I tell her, grabbing her sleeve and pulling her down the stairs with me.
"Bonne après-midi, mesdames." (Good afternoon, ladies.) Jerry says as he takes Diana's hand. "You look beautiful, Diana." He reaches down and kisses her knuckles. I can't help but shriek. They are truely adorable.
I look around and everyone is dancing around. They switch partners every few minutes in the middle of the dance, continuing their choreography with whoever is next in line.
"Let's go dance." Jerry asks Diana with a smile.
"Oh no, I can't leave Florence alone."
"It's fine, Diana. Go have fun. I'll be alright. I surely am not getting lost."
She smiles excitedly and runs into the circle of dancing bodies, clasping her hand around Jerry's. They join the choreography and dance like nothing was going to stop them.
"Will you join me for a dance." I voice asks behind me. I immediately smile to myself. I try to hide the smile before I turn around but it stayes on my face like it's sewn on. I turn around.
Turns out, it's not who I thought it was.
"Mr. Phillips." I say. My smile turns into a frown but I hide my fear.
"It's good to see you, Florence." He says. He reaches out his hand, expecting me to take it. And I do. I am afraid of saying no to him. I'm afraid of what he can do to make me feel even smaller than he already has made me feel. I'm afraid he'll destroy me. We walk to the circle and join in on the dance. We swiftly move on the floor as the music wavers around us.
"You truely are a master piece." He whispers to me. "A beautiful master piece."
To that, I don't answer. I don't know how to answer. I just want him to let go of my hand. I want him to stop touching me. He spins me around and dips me down. This is supposed to be a special moment. It is supposed to be a fairytale story but it feels so far from that.
"So devine. You seem unreal."
His words twist me in a way.
"Do I?"
"Oh yes." He gets really close to me. To the point where I can feel his breath shiver against my ear. "Tell me, Florence, do you ever think about... marriage?"
Oh god.
"I... I don't know."
"Hmm. I do, you see. You and I... I think it is incredible that I found you."
"Is it?"
"It is, indeed." He says grinning. "How about we get out of here for a few minutes? Just you and I?" He asks.
"Uhh..." Before I know it, I have spun to the next dance partner.
"Do you need to get out of here?" Gilbert, my new partner, asks me. It's as if he was listening to the whole conversation the professor and I had.
"Yes please." He grabs my hand and leads me to a corner where no one can see us.
"Please be honest. Did he do something to you? Florence, did he or did he not touch you without consent?"
There is no way I can hide it anymore. At least not from Gilbert. He knows it happened and I am not going to deny the answer anymore. I even try to deny it to myself but that is going to stop. What happened is making me ill and I need help.
"He raped me." For a moment I can't believe that those words have left my mouth. It has only now hit me that I am a victim of sexual assault. That stings. I feel weak in the knees and I feel like tears are beginning to fill in my eyes.
Gilbert swallows hard. I think he's not saying anything because he already knew what I was going to say. He expected it. I see a muscle in his jaw shift. For a moment he looks angry but then his expression softens. Instead of saying anything, he pulls me in. He hugs my body as I try not to weep into his chest. Yes, I try, but I do not succeed. I wrap my hands around him and let it all out. My head gets sore as I let my energy out as cries. Gilbert keeps me secure in his arms and does not let go. Not that I want him to.
