eternity// 5SOS

18

Poppy

I woke up with a start, covering my face with my hands.

It was my birthday and I hated it. Even better, I had just had a really bad dream about today, so it was now 2am and I was stuck.

I grabbed my phone, dad having let me kept it tonight to text my friends a bit longer, then went onto the phone app and hovered over Luke's contact.

Then Ashton's. Then Calum's. Then back to Luke.

My breathing was getting tighter and I bit my thumb, tears burning up in my eyes. I didn't want my birthday anymore.

I pushed down on Luke and put my headphones in, my hands starting to shake.

"Poppy?" he said, his voice croaked, "Is everything okay?"

"No,"

"What's wrong?"

"I can't breathe,"

"What's wrong sweetheart? Tell me what's up,"

"My birthday,"

"Okay, alright. You are going to have a great day, honey, everyone will do as you ask. If you want quiet then you can have quiet, and me and the guys are all coming round so we can make sure you're okay,"

"I don't want it,"

"Why not?"

"I don't. It's not good. It's bad. It's bad,"

"Poppy, could you go and find your mum and dad? I think they can help a lot better,"

"Okay,"

"You're doing such a good job,"

I ended the call and put my phone down, feeling in the dark for my crutches. Then, I went to the stairs and left them at the bottom, shuffling on my bum to the top.

Desperately, I crawled and shuffled my way to mum and dad's room, opening the door. I couldn't help myself from crying.

The lamp turned on and dad looked down confused, mum climbing out of bed.

"Hey buttercup, what's wrong?" she said, helping me sit up, "Big breaths,"

"Birthday,"

"What about your birthday?"

"Bad. It's bad. Bad,"

I shook my head and covered my face, my hands still shaking.

Birthdays in the past had been bad. Birthday celebrations had always been different. The attention was always on me negatively.

"I'm scared,"

"It's okay to be scared, it's a new experience in the house. I promise it will be just like dad's, and Nathan's, and Elijah's,"

"There's no proof!"

"Hey," she hushed, brushing the hair from my face, "Did you not see all the banners on the way up?"

"No,"

"Okay, well there are banners, and presents, and dad got you a big cake,"

I began to cry quietly instead and she hugged me, dad climbing out of bed to sat the other side.

"Why don't we go downstairs and have a sneak peek?"

"Birthdays are bad. I don't wanna be older, mum. I don't want it,"

"We are gonna make birthdays good because growing older can be something really fun. You can do new things and mature,"

"What new things?"