Memories ~ Attack on Titan

Chapter fifteenth

I was pushed and shoved as the crowed of cadets and soldiers gathered outside to hear farther instructions. I looked around and was relieved when I saw a familiar face.
Thank god, Reiner.
I pushed through the crowed and grabbed onto the sleeve of his jacked trying to pull myself to him. He noticed this and laughed. He grabbing my hand and pulling me hard sending my crashing into his body. I backed away best I could and looked up at the boy annoyed, "im actually relieved to see you Reiner." Reiner ruffled my hair but I quickly swiped his hand away and slicked down my hair. His face turned serious, "Rin, I have to go find my friends, please be careful and I'll find you as soon as possible." I felt confused, "Reiner wait. Don't just leave me here." But Reiner ignored me.
Reiner was a good friend, but he was bipolar as hell.

ALL SQUADRONS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR RUNNING SUPPLIES, RELAYING MESSAGES AND PHYSICAL COMBAT UNDER STRICT COMMAND OF THE GARRISON REGIMENT.
THE INTERIOR SQUADRONS WILL TAKE THE VANGUARD.
CADETS WILL TAKE THE MIDDLE GUARD, BEING LEAD BY THE SUPPORT SQUAD.
REAR GUARD WILL GO TO THE ELITES.
I EXPECT YOU ALL TO MAN YOUR POST, ESPECIALLY KNOWING THAT THE ADVANCE TEAM HAS BEEN WIPED OUT.

A gasp was heard among the crowd when he said this.
The advance team was whipped how? How is that even possible? How the hell do they expect these cadets to be able to do anything when their highly trained soldiers were cleared out so easily?
What the hell are they thinking?

THATS RIGHT, THE OUTTER GATE IS NOW HISTORY. THE TITANS ARE IN. MEANING THE ARMORED TITAN IS ALSO LIKELY TO APPEAR AGAIN. IF HE DOES THE INNER GATE WILL ALSO BE HISTORY.
The others started whispering, this was bad.
QUIET.
THE ONES IN THE VANGUARD BY READY. YOUR MISSION IS SIMPLE, DEFEND THE WALLS UNTIL THE EVACUATION ENDS.
NOW ALL OF YOU SHOULD KNOW, DESERTION IS PUNISHABLE BY DEATH. IF YOU NEED TO, LAY DOWN YOUR LIVES.
DISMISSED.
everyone threw their hands to their chest, including me. Then everyone started running, but I stood my ground. I was looking for someone I knew and honestly I was afraid if I moved I'd be swept away. I waited until the area cleared and I saw some of the others in my class, Christa, Marco, and Jean. I felt a wave of relief wash over me. I stoped when I approached them. A man in front of us vomited and I suddenly got the urge to do the same. I scooted next to Jean, he looked so angry, but I knew he was just scared. Jean was a coward, he pretend to be big but he wasn't. He had wasn't a fighter.
He didn't acknowledge me, he instead stormed off leaving me standing there again looking like an idiot. I shook my head, feeling anger rise to my face.
How dare he treat me like this. After everything we've said to eachother. I get he's scared but he's not just going to leave me worrying about him.

I stalked behind him, my head was so flustered that I didn't even notice Eren walked straight towards us, until his shoulder rammed into Jean's
"Move it." Jean yelled as he pushed Eren into me. "what the hell man what's your problem?" Eren said not even trying to keep the slowly rising anger out of his tone. Then Jean went off, "what the hell kind of question is that we're about to get eaten alive you want me to sing you some happy song? You're loving this aren't you, you psycho, your whole dream is to be eaten. Well you and Rin enjoy that I'll have e no part in it!"
"Jean-" eren tried to interrupt but Jean kept going.
"No! Not all of us are suicidal you know. You two just love talking about going outside the walls and waiting to be killed by these monsters. Go get yourselves killed if you want I don't give a damn!"
Eren turned to me for a quick moment and he picked up the feelings in my eyes. Thats when Eren lost it too.
Ouch. You don't give a damn huh? That's how it's going to be? Fine I'll play that game too.

Eren pushed Jean against the wall, "we trained for this, what the hell do you think we we've doing the past 3 years? We survived, and not everyone can say that right? Some people couldn't take it, hell some even died. But not us, am I right? We powered thought these few years so what's one more day. You can do this Jean, I get you're scared and taking it out on me is fine, don't don't do that to her. The MP's will still be waiting for you tomorrow."
My heart skipped a beat when he mentioned me.
I'm okay.
I looked at the boys, I've never seen Eren look so genuine before, it didn't even feel like I was looking at the same boy.
Jean looked shocked, he was quick turning back to his usual scowl. He then looked away and cursed under his breath, finally looked at me. Jean grabbed my wrist and started walking back the other directing. I let it happen but still let my annoyance be known, "damn you could have just asked." Jean ignored me however, "Damnit Daz stop balling and get on your feet." He shouted at one of our other comrades as he pulled me past the crying boy.
We stoped not too far away, Jean didn't look at me, he looked like he wanted to say something but his mouth wouldn't form the words. I looked up at him with cold, half lidded eyes, "Jean," I said firmly, but before I could finish he interrupted, "no Rin, I don't like that expression on you." I stood up straight and raising my eyebrows. I think Jean could tell he took me off guard because he walked closer to me and put a hand on the back of my head, he pulled me into his body and buried he face in my hair. I didn't hug him back, but he didn't seem to fazed, he just rubbed my back and I could feel him taking in my sent. After a moment he pulled away, and I looked up at him with a blank expression. I didn't have feelings for Jean, but now wasn't the time, this world and this life I was running towards had no room for romance.
Our moment was interrupted by a garrison member, "Rin, You're with me. You and Mikasa have been assigned to the rear guard on special orders." He said as Mikasa stood at his side. I looked at the man with frowned brows, "but sir, we're only cadets-"but this time Mikasa cut me off, "it's time to go Rin. Just do are you're ordered." I took a sharp breath. I looked back at Jean, "I won't be able to protect you so please just-" he interrupted with a small hit to the back of my head, "didn't you hear the man? Go." I looked at the ground.
I promised Marco and Armin and Jean that I would protect them, and how could I protect them from the rear guard.
The soldier spoke again, "we don't have time for this, let's go." He said and started to walk away, Mikasa waited on me as I whispered one more thing to Jean.
"You better not die. Fine me first thing when this is over."

The evacuation was taking forever, I was doing my best to help the others but the titans keeps coming and the people weren't moving. Mikasa and I were sent to the gate to see what the hold us was. On the way I saw a Titan heading towards me.
Wow, so this is what that look like up close. Nasty fuckers. Brace yourself Rin and do what you were trained to do. Nothing fancy, just take it out.
I steadied myself and connected to the wall behind the titans and then to the Titan back. I sliced the nape. First Titan down.
On the way Mikasa and I saw another Titan, she took this one down with ease, I stood on the ground as Mikasa stood on the fallen Titan. I looked at the crowd, "hey, what's going on?" I asked. Then suddenly a man interrupted, "Perfect, have these useless worms push my wagon and I'll pay you both." Mikasa looked so shocked and hurt. We exchanged a look. This man was disgusting. Mikasa said in a clearly offended tone, "seriously? Soldiers are dying, all because this is taking so long."
The man scoffed, "yea that's their job, you want me to shed a tear because they finally had to do what they signed up for? You're supposed to be willing to lay down your life!" Mikasa's face turned dark, "yea, no arguing with that, you're absolutely right sir" she said as she started to March towards the man. Anger flooded my vision, thought of cutting this man down plagued my mind. Then I felt a wave of shocks something pull the sleeve of my jacked, I turned around and saw a little girl, crying, her mother standing not far behind her. "Please miss, are we all going to die here?" My eyes widened for a moment before I forced my face back to its natural expression. I bend down in front of the girl, "I won't let that happen." I looked over and saw the wagon being pulled out of the gate. And all of the citizens started running thought. Then Mikasa moved to stand beside me. We watched as the families flooded through the gate. I felt a wave of relief wash over both of us.

"Good work, both of you, I'm so impressed" the soldier said to Mikasa and I as we stood on a roof top. I took a deep breath, "I could have done better, i dulled my blades to quickly, I'll get better" I felt so worthless, my dad would have taken down more Titans, then the soldier looked at me and said, "you don't have to hold yourself to such high standards cadet." Then Mikasa spoke, "I did what I could sir, I need to be more careful too, I dulled both my blades as well." The soldier sighed, "what the hell have you lived through to be so non-chalant."
I looked over at him with a cold expression. In that moment the man looked at me like I was Levi. He looking at the ground ," you look just like him you know, you both have that same terrifying look. I'm sorry, that was uncalled for."

Mikasa and I now headed for the others, hoping to find Eren and Jean. But I still had a nasty feeling in my stomach.