Memories ~ Attack on Titan

Chapter forty three

It was time. We positioned the barrels in front of the door leading down to where we assumed Reiss and Eren would be. We knew we weren't getting in and out without a fight so this time we weren't unprepared. Levi looked to his squad, then over to me, "ready?" He asked in a hushed tone. I nodded sharply. I had to be ready, hesitation wasn't an option. Levi kicked the door open suddenly before pushing the barrels down the stairs and into the room. We took Kenny's squads brief moment of confusion as an opening to run into the room and down the stairs, as Sasha shot the barrels with a fire arrow, causing them to explode and fill the room with smoke. I ran next to my boyfriend, "Jean! We might get separated, I have to head to the front and back up the others!" Jean looked over at me and forced a smile, I could see all the fear behind that smile but I knew he understood. I flew to the front next to Levi, the two of us barreled towards the opposing squad. They aimed, and missed. Hange and a few of the others were sitting on a far cliff shooting out signal flares. The green smoke, mixed with the black smoke from the barrels, made it almost impossible for the enemy to catch us. They couldn't shoot if I didn't know where target was. I couldn't help but notice how weird this room was though, it was huge, but not so big, that I couldn't see all ends of it. It look like it was made out of ice or glass. But it wasn't cold and these pillars definitely weren't fragile.
What is this shit? Is it ice? No it's not wet or cold. Wait a second. Is this whole room made of Titan hardening?
Tighten hardening. That had to be with this weird place was made out of. Levi and I flew in opposite directions, I was watching his back while he counted the soldiers above. " 35 total! In upper parts of the pillars!" He shouted. " Continue the plan! Will take them all out right here!" I felt cold chills all over my body as all the others now join the fight. I flew around the room with incredible speed. I use the smoked him ask myself how to sneak behind a group of two soldiers slicing their heads off, clean with my blades. I didn't stop for a moment to look back, I just kept going forward. I saw 2 soldiers attacking Connie, I flew towards him. He managed to dodge the bullet and use the smoke to sneak behind one of them, killing him. Another soldier posited her gun at him but simultaneously as I cut her head off and arrow also pierced her body. I looked in the direction it was coming from, Sasha. It was hard but I knew I had to keep going forward. I felt my adrenaline pushing to the max. My brain felt like just a blur of rage and power as I cut down 3 more soldiers, I was able to snag one of their guns right before it hit the ground. I used the gun to shoot down 2 more soldiers. Then someone caught my eye, a blond woman in the middle, who seem to be giving orders to the others. I made direct eye contact with her, I thought my body behind a fume in my mind, wearing nothing but pure adrenaline. She looked almost terrified, was it because she was losing? And then behind her I saw my father. She looked back at him, fear now consuming her features. My father and I both charged her, but when I saw him, my body hesitated. Kenny Ackerman.
He shot at my father, causing him to have to hide behind a pillar. I felt fear and adrenaline consume me but it was to late, I tried to stop, but I ran into a pillar, causing me to gasp as all the air left my lungs and I fell. As I was falling I saw Kenny, "WOO HOO!" He yelled. That was the last image in my brain before I hit the ground hard. I think the impact was too strong for my brain to actually process how much pain I was in. I didn't remember passing out, I didn't remember watching the world fading to Black. I never saw the pile of blood the dripped from the puller where I met my doom. I thought that I had died.
I sat up slowly, rubbing my eyes. Damn. I don't remember it being this bright. My eyesight was blurry but after a moment it cleared. I felt my heart accelerate as I jumped to my feet in panic. Where am I? I was surrounded by white, white floors, white ceiling, and white walls, if you could even call them walls. It looks like it was just the world that was white now, empty and motionless.  I started to walk forward, then I heard a voice. "Rin." It felt like my heart stoped, "Miche.." I ran forward, trying to hear him again, desperate to hear that familiar voice that I'd pushed out of my head for the fear of my grief consuming me. "MICHE!" I screamed, desperate for a familiar face and not caring about the implications. Then I saw someone standing far off in the distance, so far that they looked like they could be a coin on the floor. I kept running, allowing the adrenaline to consume me, I needed to see him. The closer I got the more I could see it. Miche, standing with his back facing me, seemingly unmoving. My breath hitched until I got closer and closer until suddenly my body crashed into his. I hit with such force yet he didn't move, I wrapping my arms around him, squeezing for dear life. I pushed my face into his back, the realization of what just happened slowly kicking in. I pulled back slowly and looked at the back of my friend's head, "Miche.." I said but my words only came out in a whisper, I felt my heard pound in my chest while I waited for a response. Miche slowly turned around to face me, a small smile spread onto his face, "hey kid. I've been waiting for you." I've been waiting for you.
Those words echoed in my head. "Waiting..for me?" I asked curious. Miche chucked, his laugh brought me a sense of comfort, he felt so familiar, like he was never gone. I looked around again, nothing had changed, "so Miche, where are we." Miche looked up and around, "I was going to ask you the same thing." I felt a cold sweat take over my body, "Miche.." I whispered, looking back at the man in front of me. He turned his attention back to me, "hm?" I built up the courage to ask what I've been needing to ask, "are you..dead?" Miche let out a deep, heavy sigh, "yea kid." I felt my guts clench, "does that mean we're both dead..is this what comes next?" Miche's face relaxed as he spoke, "no Rin, this isn't what comes next. But whether or not you choose to be dead, that's up to you."
Choose to be dead? So does that mean I have the option? That makes not sense, one can't come back from the dead or just will death upon them selves. I suppose I was thinking to hard because I jerked at the feeling of Miche pushing my shoulder and the sound of his laughter, "don't think so hard about it. Being dead is easier, but you are your father's kid, so I know you probably won't accept that." I looked down at my feet. I closed my eyes for a moment.
Everyone i love is dying, my friends, my family, they're all dying so gruesome, I got the easy way out. Should I really go back? Do I really want to be devoured by a titan? But what about my dad? What about my Jean? God Jean is probably freaking out. But still, it's so warm here, it feels like home. But my friends are out they're dying, Eren hasn't been rescued. Am I really OK with dying before finally knowing the secrets of
Walls? My really OK with letting my family put down their lives while I'm sitting here in the comfort of wherever the hell this is? I know what I have to do, but God am I not ready to let him go again.
I looked back up at Miche who raised an eyebrow, "I need to go home." Miche nodded, "I knew that's what you'd say," he placed a hand on my shoulder, I felt a tear roll down my face. Miche pulled my into his chest and I couldn't stop the tears from pouring out of my eyes. Miche sighed, "don't cry Rin. This isn't goodbye, it's just see you later. We're all gonna be here waiting. Go home, and do what needs to be done." I took a sniff of his smell, taking in the warmth of his hug one last time before pulling away. I put my fist to my chest, looking at the man who taught me how to fight, the man who I ate with, walked with, and the man who helped raise me. Miche put his fist to his chest, "dedicate your heart, soldier."
Goodbye. Miche.