JJ Maybank Imagines

Sick of Acting🤍

This is a small trigger warning.
This imagine touches on the topic of when a guy is just using you for your body. It also talks about how Y/n hasn't eaten in a while or slept. It doesn't really go into depth of the eating or sleeping thing but I just though I should warn ya'll because I wouldn't want someone to be uncomfortable. 
Also if you are in a situation like this PLEASE message me and we can talk anytime. Love you guys!

It's almost 1:00 AM. The text will probably come soon. He only texts me at night when he wants something. Why do I keep doing this to myself? I'm so sick of pretending that it's okay I just want to have a normal relationship. He just wants my body. He doesn't actually want me.

I pace back and forth in the chateau spare bedroom thinking of what I'm supposed to do. My heart drops when my phone dings and the screen lights up.

I can't keep doing this.

"Just fuck off already!" I practically yell at my phone. Maybe that was a bit too loud. I forgot about the Pogues sleeping over. It's fine they are all probably passed out by now. Besides they're on the couch anyway.

I stand still and glare at my phone that lays on the bed. Should I answer it? I know it's him.

"Y/n you okay?" A knock sounds from my bedroom door. JJ's voice is coming from the other side. I didn't mean to wake him.

"Yeah sorry I just-" What am I supposed to say? "Never mind." I sigh as I run my fingers through my hair.

"Can I come in?" He whispers.

"Yeah sure." The door knob twists and JJ walks in. He's wearing no shirt and only Grey sweat pants. His hair is a mess and he looks like he has been asleep for a billion years from how much he is squinting his eyes.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He questions one more time. I look at my phone before I look back at him. Every time someone asks me that question I feel like I'm going to break.

Please don't cry y/n, not in front of JJ. I want to cry so bad. I'm so sick of pretending.

JJ takes a step forward to see me better. "Hey, why do you look like you're about to cry?" He brings his hand up to my cheek and turns my head to make me look him in the eye. "What happened? You can tell me anything you know." Why does he care?

"I just-" I can't get the words out. A tear falls from my eyes and JJ is quick to wipe it away. He pulls me closer to him and wraps his arms around me in a hug. I haven't had a hug in a long time. It feels nice.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" He whispers with his cheek resting on the top of my head.

"He's just using me." I don't think I've ever talked to anyone about this before.

"Who? Who's using you?"

"Rafe." The name comes out in a really quiet whisper, as if I was scared to say it. Why does Rafe scare me?

"What did he do?" Why does he care so much? No one has ever cared this much. John B practically shut me out after dad went missing, he thinks I don't want to talk to him. But I want nothing more than to just talk to someone. Anyone.

"He texts me every night, only at night. Only when he wants attention. He asks me to send him pictures of my body and then ignores me after he gets them. And I can't do it anymore, it's fucking with my head JJ." It feels good just to let it all out. "He acts like he likes me, but he won't date me because he doesn't want to be in a committed relationship. He said he doesn't think he would be loyal." I can feel JJ's arms physically tense up the more I talk about it. Does this bother him? Should I even be saying this? "It's okay you don't have to worry. I'll just deal with it you can go back to sleep." I say, pulling out of the hug.