Innocence | Severus Snape x Reader

47 - Occlumency

I sat with Severus in his chambers. Neither of us were particularly tired, so we both read and drank tea. I wouldn't start packing for the Holiday until tomorrow. Severus and I agreed we'd go home for a few days this year and spend Christmas together, compared to the last few. I hadn't a clue what I'd get him. 

"I'm hoping that the holiday will give us an opportunity to relax," I said to Severus. 

"Hopefully it will. I want to be able to spend time with each other without any sort of concern or interruption. I want to be able to put all of my focus on you." I looked up to see that Severus hadn't even been looking at his book but at me. 

"You give me a lot of attention already Severus, don't sell yourself short," I said to him, putting my own book down. 

"Yes, but I want to make this Christmas special for you. You deserve a few days to relax, and to be treated." He explained, and I could tell he wasn't even being lovey-dovey he was being dead serious. 

"And you deserve the same," I said to him. 

"You've been through hell and back-" 

"As have you," 

"And I just want to give you a break," He continued to say, despite my interruption. 

Someone cleared their throat and I was confused, but Severus looked to the usually vacant canvas on the wall, which now has a person in it. It was a painting. 

"Dumbledore wishes to see the both of you." 

Severus and I made our way to Dumbledore's office. As we entered we looked around and saw Minerva, the Weasleys, Harry, and Dumbledore. 

"You wished to see me, headmaster?" Severus said after glancing over the room. I was glad neither of us had chosen to get into our pajamas yet. 

"Oh, Severus. I'm afraid we can't wait. Not even till morning." Dumbledore said, approaching us. "Otherwise, we'll all be vulnerable." 

"What happened?" I asked Harry as we left Dumbledore's office. 

"The snake... Mister Weasley, it attacked him, I saw it in my dream." Harry said, as Severus started dragging him by the arm down the stairs, I walked behind. "Except, I was the snake." 

"What do you mean you were the snake?" I asked. I wished Severus wasn't walking so damn fast.

"In the dream. I wasn't just watching it I... was attacking Mister Weasley." 

As we walked to Severus' office I let that settle in my mind. 

"Sit," Severus said to the boy. I didn't want to interfere, so I stood off to the side. 

"It appears there is a connection between the Dark Lord's mind and your own." He said as he got out his wand, "Whether he is, as of yet, aware of this connection is unclear. Pray he remains ignorant."

"You mean, if he knows about it then he'll be able to read my mind?" Harry asked. I could tell by his tone that there was a concern. 

"Read it, control it... unhinge it," Severus said, turning towards the boy. "In the past, it was often the Dark Lord's pleasure to invade the minds of his victim, creating visions designed to torture them into madness. Only after extracting the last exquisite ounce of agony, only when he had them literally begging for death, would he finally kill them." 

Severus, I could tell, was choosing words that would inspire further fear into Harry, I hoped as a method to inspire him into trying at this. 

It was an extremely challenging form of magic, that I hadn't even completely mastered yet. What of it I could do, I couldn't keep up for very long. Some of it I blamed on the fact that Severus was no doubt very strong. Which scared me, because I knew Voldemort was stronger. 

"Used properly, the power of Occlumency will help shield you from access or influence. In these lessons, I will attempt to penetrate your mind. You will attempt to resist. Prepare yourself." Severus got his wand at the ready and cast the spell. 

I could tell Potter didn't like the feeling. Nor did I the first time Severus had done it to me, though I had practically let Severus into my mind the first time he did it when giving me occlumency lessons. 

The first time he ever read my mind, I didn't even know because I had no guard up, and he didn't have to try. With the lessons, he more forced himself into my mind and for the moment I tried to resist, it was like a headache. I didn't have any stamina and practically let him in. 

"Concentrate, Harry, focus." I tried giving him gentle words of encouragement to combat Severus' harsher tone. 

Severus was being much more aggressive with Harry than he had been with me, and frankly, it almost upset me, but I couldn't interfere. I had to trust that everything Severus did had a reason. 

Watching Harry reminded me of my lessons this past summer. Whenever I wasn't sleeping, I was studying Runes, and if I was studying runes it was hours of lessons with Severus. He incrementally increased his strength. It was hard. 

He was touched that all of my fondest memories were of him. He went for those almost every time because it would stimulate would Voldemort would go for first, then he went for the memories of my parents, which often ended in me crying, and the lesson for the day concluding.