Dawn in Vancouver

Chapter 30: "No"

"Why can't you hold me in the street? Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor? I wish that it could be like that. Why can't it be like that? 'Cause I'm yours"

Fragment written by Camila Cabello

Camila was desperate to get there. The two hour drive had taken forever because she wanted so badly to hold Lauren for hours and kiss her. Her hands shook with anticipation, as her eyes closed as she leaned her face against the window careful not to damage the heavy bump from the night before that had caused part of her forehead to be covered in a purple color that was very unpleasant.

But the bump was the least of her problems. All she wanted was to be with the woman she loved. To see her beautiful green eyes and get lost in them. To lose herself in that world where they could be together. Where they could kiss on the street, on a dance floor. Where they could live their love without having to constantly lie. Love was such a pure feeling that it should not be hidden. Camila sighed as she touched her aching forehead trying to control her emotions. She needs Lauren.

"Lauren, I need you so much my love."

It had been a single day without her and she was going crazy. She was desperate to see her. And that feeling of need was scaring the hell out of her. Twenty-four hours and she was going crazy. What would happen when the three months came to an end and she would never see her again?

That thought was so terrifying that Camila erased it from her mind as the car moved forward and silence filled it.

"How much do you stare out the window and sigh," Jason asked dryly, "Did the blow make you dumber?" -He laughed softly and Camila just cringed in pain at his words.

"My head hurts," Camila said softly.

"I don't want you to even think of mentioning to anyone what happened. I'll just say that because you're so clumsy you fell down the stairs. I'm sure Ryan and Lauren won't ask questions because they won't doubt it."

Camila watched the trees with a sad look on her face. Lauren would ask her about the hit and she didn't want to lie to her. But the prospect of Lauren knowing that Jason was not only psychologically abusing her but physically abusing her was terrifying. Lauren would never keep quiet and would surely detest her for her cowardice. Camila didn't want to lose her.

"I hope Ryan is finally done," Jason said suddenly snapping Camila out of her thoughts.

"Done with what?" -she asked softly.

"He called me at the hotel asking if we could stay longer," Jason laughed. "Looks like the idiot got lucky with your singer friend last night. And he wanted to have more time with her."

Camila felt like she was being stabbed in the heart. Her mind hit her with images that made her heart start to break. Her hands shook. Not Lauren. Lauren was hers.

No, please don't.

"Got lucky?" -Camila asked, feeling her eyes fill with tears.

"Well, they probably spent hours doing it," Jason laughed. "Lauren looks like one of those women who likes sex day and night. From what I understood from Ryan, he wouldn't let her off his back."

Camila closed her eyes in horror as a wave of pain shot through her body. It was so strong that a small moan came from her throat causing Jason to turn to look at her for a few seconds. She was living a nightmare. A horrible nightmare where she was being told that the woman she adored had been with someone else. A person who could be with her without hiding. A person who had promised before an altar to be with her always. Her husband.

"Did he say that?" -Camila asked, her voice cracking.

"He didn't say it that way, stupid," Jason said in exasperation. "But that's what I understood"-Camila clenched her hands in helplessness. "But what can I expect you to understand about having good sex. While he's married to a famous woman, I have to put up with you, you're a good-for-nothing, no good at spreading her legs. Surely Lauren is good in bed with that body. I'm sure she lives with desire."